That Chemo Brain

I haven’t posted anything in a while. Having thoughts, and getting them from my mind, to the page, is similar to herding cats. Being a writer, that loves to write? This was frustrating.

I’ve come to relax. It is safer for everyone I love. What used to flow from my heart through my hands, is now literally pecking one sentence, or thought, at a time. They call it Chemo Brain, and I fought it for a long time. I should be able to do, say, and think like I normally would before Chemo, right? Tomorrow will be my 10th treatment, so no. Everything is new.

I’ve attempted some crazy stuff during Chemo, like mowing my yard that sits in Texas. Tasks I took for granted became insurmountable. Being the poster child for Overthinkers Anonymous, I didn’t want Chemo Brain. If someone asks you what you want for dinner, and you can’t figure that out, you probably shouldn’t be operating machinery with sharp blades.

Be encouraged my warrior, because Chemo has it’s perks. Early on in this journey, I documented, “Things I Love (Thanks to Chemo).” You may be having toxins pumped into your body, but the outer shell is looking good. My eyes are bright, and clear, and that shower is down to 5 minutes. No more shaving because your body is hairless from head to toe.

You have this healthy glow, but I’m guessing it’s because my insides are glowing. One of the most difficult things for me to embrace, was the mindlessness. I’m quiet a lot. Mainly because the thoughts go by before I can converse. If they give me too much steroid with my treatment, you don’t wanna hear my thoughts. Steroids help fight the disease, but I have heard they turn me into an ass. You learn really quick who loves you the day after Chemo.

The best part is, this is only temporary. Everything my body is going through will pass. It’s all part of the fight. I saw a quote and posted it to my Letigocoach Facebook page. “The best cure for the body is a quiet mind.”-Napoleon Bonaparte. Well, my mind is pretty quiet, so heal away body. God will bring me through this better than before. For now, I can be quiet.

mescarf (135x240)

Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 16-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. She found out in March of this year that she has Breast Cancer. Going through Chemo, and believing God for a miracle is where she stands. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

2 thoughts on “That Chemo Brain

  1. Mary Ann says:

    One of my favorite verses is, “Be still and know that I am God”. Unfortunately I don’t listen to it like I should, however, this is your season for this verse. Rest, pray and know that you are loved by so many. Especially ME!!!!!

    Like

    • Letitgocoach says:

      Troy’s Mother gave me a bracelet for Christmas. It’s a silver bangle, and has that verse engraved in it. I wear it everyday. Thank you so much for being here, and for your love and prayers. I love you too!!!

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s