This Is Only A Test

If you read my Blog yesterday, you know, I’ve been on vacation in Colorado with limited Internet. The home we’re staying in didn’t have it, so we would drive into town to find it. This is my last day here and it was installed today.

First and foremost, kudos goes out to Mr. Smith. He has been so patient with me this week. When you consider, everything I do is conducted virtually, it was not pretty the first few days. He is in the kitchen right now, being who he is, a Chef. I’m in the same room I was yesterday, typing this Blog with the windows open, listening to the musical sound of the river. This time, I’m not typing a word document to copy and paste later in town. I am actually online.

We respect one another for who we are and what we do. While he is in the kitchen, no one enters. Oh, it’s tempting, but one look from him and I know better. He plays music very loudly, and it’s a mixture of everything. I can hear it echoing through the house, down the hallway to the room I’m in. He just popped his head in the door, and asked if I was going to stay in here all night. I won’t, but it is a struggle not to stop and close the door on some of that music.

lakeI have spent almost a week in Colorado and it’s been beautiful. When people tell you to drink plenty of water in high altitude, listen to them. I was in a world of pain from dehydration. Drinking my usual, coffee in the morning, hot tea in the evening, and sips of water during the day wasn’t enough. I spent all day yesterday drinking water and my body thanked me today.

I know my body pretty well, but had not felt anything like this before. Once we pinpointed it was the change in elevation, about 6,000 feet, I knew what to do. With no distraction from technology, I was able to hear from God quite often. God gave me insight into the future of my writing, coaching, work, this school year for my daughter, my relationships and Himself.

The repacking process will begin this evening, to head back to Texas. My daughter turns sweet sixteen this Saturday and I wouldn’t miss it. We haven’t seen one another in over a week and that’s been an adjustment as well. We are best friends and she is a light in my life.

This was definitely a week of tiny tests, and I hope I passed them. There were a lot of little things that occurred, too many to list here, that were lessons. Being here placed me in present moment to present moment as I listened and learned. Gratitude is running high, for the friends and family God has given me and the love I have in my life today.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 15 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a LetItgocoach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is working on her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

Do You Like The Person You’ve Become

Do you like the person you’ve become? A week ago, I would have answered yes to that question, but now I have cause to pause. I am on vacation in the Colorado mountains and there is no Internet.

It was all fine and good, riding toward our destination, looking at my phone with 4G and 5 bars. We hit a threshold in elevation and all these comforting lights on my phone just disappeared. The only light showing up was the battery charge light and this bothered me more than I wanted to admit.

blog12I had lost all communication with civilization. I couldn’t post a Blog, or check my Letitgocoach Facebook page. My daughter is vacationing with her Dad in Florida, but I’m pretty sure Florida has 4G, so she could text me but I couldn’t text her. I didn’t realize how much the connectivity had become a part of who I am. I wasn’t sure I liked who was staring at her phone in utter sadness.

Our car transitioned from pavement onto a dirt road and made it’s way across a wooden bridge. Driving from Texas, the temperature had dropped significantly and to me it felt cold. The movie, “Deliverance’ came to mind as we made our way through the woods as the road came to an end. There stood a lovely, Colorado style home made of wood, rock and windows, nestled alone in the forest. Stepping out of the car, I became aware of a loud, roaring noise.

Behind the house was a rushing river. It was very loud and was making itself known full force. I took a couple of pictures and made a note to post it on Facebook when we were in town. The river was so loud, you could hear it from inside the house with the windows shut. The house had doors that would seal shut upon closing and it blocked some of the noise, but several windows hung open.

It took me a few days to get acclimated to my new surroundings. I was amazed how this natural environment was such a contrast to what I was used to. This was how God made it to be. Cool, crisp air, and the sun pouring into the windows so brightly, you needed sunglasses to walk through the house. Feeling the warmth from a fire in the fireplace, and sleeping underneath a down comforter, in August.

I had become more connected virtually than to nature. For this natural environment to seem like Twilight Zone material is not natural. I shouldn’t feel more comfort looking at a phone screen lit up than the night sky. The sight and sound of a raging river should not be noise, it should be a soothing sound. I find it humorous now, that my first thought was to post a picture of it on Facebook, instead of enjoying it.

Wish Me Goodnight

I fell asleep texting Mr. Smith lastnight. We were talking and I dozed off and felt bad for doing that. Woke up in the middle of the night searching the bed for my phone. He knew what had happened, but he still wished me goodnight.

I have only had three long lasting relationships in my life. Some would say the first one doesn’t count because I was young and stupid. They all count and prepare you for what’s next. Each one gives you a sense of what is good for you.

blogI’ll be the first to admit, I’m not the easiest person to love. Being an independent woman and following God’s path, there is not a lot of needs. Maybe every man wants to feel needed, but I have learned to need God.

What I want and what God wants for me are two different things. The same applies to my relationship with Mr. Smith. He is not love on demand and he will Make Me Wait. What I want and what he thinks I need are two different things, just like between God and me. Mr. Smith is good for me.

I tease him frequently that he doesn’t treat me right and he watches while I have my fits. I have had many a fit before God too and He watches and waits for me to get done. Sometime I feel like the child in public putting on a show trying to get their way. This usually mean a big time out for me.

God and Mr. Smith have my best interests at heart. Mr. Smith can touch me through technology or in person. He knows the little things are important and even though I fell asleep, he still texted me our goodnight message. Waking up and seeing that filled my heart into this day. A full heart is what God wants and that’s good for Mr. Smith and me.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 15 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Let It Go Coach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is working on her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

Enjoy The Ride

I just got home and it feels good. Sitting here sipping tea and looking over the events of the day in my mind. My daughter is learning to drive and is a fabulous driver. It takes four hours to drive a two hour drive but it’s all good.

I started having a bit of a meltdown when I noticed it was almost 5 o’clock and we still weren’t home yet. Having spent most my of life in a hurry and years hurrying her, we are finally to the point where we don’t need to hurry. To allow God to lead and guide us through our day and enjoy every moment. We stop along the way at some of our favorite places. We may have left the house with a list and destination in mind, but it takes a while to get there.

I need to enjoy the ride because she will turn 16 in less than a month. In October, she will have her license and not need for me to ride with her anymore. I only have a little while longer to enjoy this and I’m gonna take it. I get to be in the truck with her, listen to all her favorite songs and she includes me in videos she sends to friends. We talk about everything and we share what’s going on in our lives. We include one another in every decision to do this life right.

sefieThis is one of my all time favorite moments right before one of our journeys. This is what I call ‘roll outta bed ready’ with our appearance. We were hoping in the truck and she grabbed me and yelled, “Selfie!” We seized the moment, blurry eyed and all. Stop, hug, smile and then go.

We get our work done in the morning, and get cleaned up after that. We cook brunch and sit at the table to plan the rest of the day. We have fun but are responsible, and always have an intention set for the day. For now, she will drive and I will ride and try to be patient. Enjoying these moments we get to share and especially during this long ride.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 15 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Let It Go Coach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is working on her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

It’s All Good

I write about beauty and this life God has given me. Something my sponsor would say to me when I complained was, “You want some cheese and crackers to go with that whine?” That caused me to stop whining and made me smile.

Sometimes I can be my own worst enemy. Overthinking any given phrase can cause me to pick apart a conversation. The handful of people I surround myself with would be better off if I would choose the correct role and stay there. My daughter wants a Mom and not a Coach. She will tell me often, “Stop coaching me.” It’s what I do, not who I am.

blog1The one thing I Coach about more than anything else is ‘happiness.’ I enjoy numerous levels of happiness, but some people have none. My passion is to help people find the right level for themselves. What is the biggest culprit of zero happiness? Other people. Yes, people happen.

It would be nice to stay in my own little pretty world, but I can’t bless others if I do that. God places people in my path wherever I go that need encouragement, even at the grocery store. They just gravitate toward me and I enjoy it very much. Sometimes it’s just to listen to their problems, or to assist them in unloading their cart. You know you have a person in desperate need when all they want is a hug.

It’s important to have at least one person in your life who knows and loves your authentic self. I can lose myself in what I do, but I have a friend in North Carolina who knows me very well. She finds it humorous that I am the woman who would not have one animal, and today, I am Sweeping Dog Hair. She gently reminds me of who I am, how far I’ve come and how God wants to use me. We need at least one person who believes in us. I am here and I believe in you.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 15 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Let It Go Coach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is working on her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

Your Beautiful Life

This morning, my daughter and I are sitting in one of our favorite shops. The owners are taking a much needed break and we are here for them. It’s a Vintage shop full of goodness, and we love being here. It’s a blessing in our lives.

I love walking though the shop and seeing everything that’s been added since my last visit. It’s one of those places you stroll through and look carefully in every nook and corner. Otherwise, you might miss something really sweet.

One of the first things I noticed was a book that looked very similar to what I have in mind. The size and how it feels in your hand, not the actual book. God has revealed what He wants me to write, but I didn’t have a feel until now.

blogThis was on my Facebook page this morning. Simple elegance is what I see and it resonated as a possible book cover. I love the acronym for SWEN, but what caught my attention foremost was the bottom left hand corner. It simply says, ‘Your Beautiful Life.’

I have been pondering this for most of this week. How beautiful life is. Going through the different phases of life, I am sitting in a sweet one. That doesn’t mean everything is perfect. I want everyone to see the beauty in life and relax into the knowing, it’s all God.

There is nothing I physically did to have what I have. God spent many years giving me a beautiful life, but it took time for me to see it. The more grateful I am, the more beautiful it becomes. Earning less money than ever before and happier than I could ever imagine.

As people walk into the shop, I smile and ask them about their day. My daughter is playing the piano beautifully and she doesn’t know how to play. Encouraging people is what I love to do and my daughter is musical. God will use us to bless others and that is what makes a beautiful life.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 15 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Let It Go Coach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is working on her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

Stealing My Joy

I had a revelation just now in the kitchen. Maybe my kitchen is the place to be because I seem to find revelation there daily. Yesterday, God showed me what my book is going to look like, just standing at the kitchen sink. Now it is clear.

I have had a page pulled up since early this morning to write this ‘Stealing My Joy’ series, and I had to just place it in drafts. God has shown me two things in the kitchen today, and one of those is…I can steal my own Joy. The other thing was, He has given me a beautiful life and that is what I can encourage others with. People want a pretty life!

blog2Every time I walked by, or sat down at my laptop, I saw the page waiting for me to type. Even though there is something right outside my door that is annoying, I don’t have to let it steal my Joy. I choose not to for now and will write about it once I have a conclusion. I want a happy ending first.

I have an extremely patient man in my life. He always lets me work. This week, I became engrossed in what I do and we lost touch.  Choosing to spend several hours with him today is just what I needed.  He brings pure goodness into my world and my life would not be as pretty without him.

My daughter is playing music and twirling like a ballerina in the den as I walk by. She asks, “Dance with me Mama?” I give her a look because she knows, I don’t dance. As I walk by her, she grabs me and gives me a hug instead. I held her tightly for a moment and just felt that moment. Our life is in constant motion, but we have to stop for these moments. These are precious moments that produce all that’s pretty.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 15 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Let It Go Coach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is working on her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com