A Better Life, Letting Go, Unbecoming 2016

To Be True

Life is beautiful, and we are taking time to cultivate it.

I saw the gradual movement of change. My daughter painted her room, and I fell in love with the feel. Walking into my own room, it didn’t give me that feel. Looking at paint colors, then testing samples, and voila! My room has that feel with completely different colors. How is that possible? We know what feels good, and both rooms do, but on different levels.

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I chose the true red over faded red, to remind myself to be true. The happiness sign hung over my bed, but I moved it to the opposite wall. When I wake up, I lay there for a moment, and ponder it’s meaning for the day. Each day holds different levels of happiness. To get good with that and just be.

I don’t have to jump out of bed anymore, and embrace the day. It’s best for me to travel through the day, and acknowledge uncertainty. People are walking in and out of my life, and I am letting them. Melody Beattie was referring to being in the middle of God’s will. We love God’s will, “but not usually while it’s working itself out.” This is true.

The place we pray to be in is uncomfortable to sit in.

Shades of PINK commented on one of my Facebook posts today with, “Perfect place to ‘BE.'” It was picture perfect. To just ‘be’ is not always how we picture it, or perfect.

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My daughter sent me that Meme. My feelings change from day to day, but God doesn’t change, and I know that to be true.

Present Moment, Quality of life

Taking A Break

I added something delightful to my mornings. After my quiet time, I curl up with my laptop, coffee in hand, and pull up my WordPress Reader. I love reading other writer’s work, and this has connected me with some Beautiful Souls. This community is a place of beauty.

I mowed my yard yesterday. That may not sound like much, or it may sound awful, but for me it was exhilarating. When it’s not 100 degrees outside, I enjoy walking behind a push mower. The last time I tried to mow was during Chemo. It didn’t end well because I almost passed out. It was one of the things I had to let go of, and let someone else step in and help.

Letting someone step in and help is a beautiful thing. I am taking a break from Social Media, but I have someone who will fill in during my absence. You will meet her soon, because she writes too. We give little pieces of ourselves throughout the day, especially doing what we love. I am reacquainting myself with the pieces of my life. To loosen my grip and see what stays.

I took a break from writing this to do a couple of things. I wanted to get to the post office before noon, to pay for my box rental. I thought they took their lunch at noon, but I soon found out, it’s 11:30. My order from Bath and Body Works had arrived, and that was sweet.

Lotion and lip gloss are my have to haves. All the lotions smell good, but I bought this one just for the name. On those day where I need a gentle reminder, I can look at this bottle.

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There was a lady standing in the Post Office going through a stack of junk mail, and we said, ‘Hello’. As I was walking out the door, she followed and said, “I want to invite you to something.”I stopped and looked at her inquisitively. Come to find out she is a martial arts instructor, and hosts self-defense classes for women, here in our little town. I am so excited!

My daughter has been wanting to take self-defense. I have been wanting some exercise other than mowing. This would be perfect! We exchanged information, and I am looking forward to the class this week. If I wouldn’t have taken a break when I did, I would have missed meeting her. God had our paths cross at His perfect timing. All I had to do was take a break.

I came home and put a chicken in the Crock Pot for dinner. Another thing of beauty.

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We will throw what’s leftover back into the Crock Pot, add water, and let it cook all night. In the morning I will have chicken stock. https://www.100daysofrealfood.com/recipe-the-best-whole-chicken-in-a-crock-pot

Taking a break can be as simple as sitting down on Numi’s level to receive dog kisses. That is one thing I won’t take a break from. To love and be loved.

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Barbara is a Writer, a Mom to her 17-year-old daughter, a recent Breast Cancer survivor, and she loves God. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Present Moment, Quality of life

When Things Happen

It’s interesting when things happen. I don’t know why, and I never know when, but they always do. I have learned to not make things happen. To not force that square peg into a round hole anymore. When things happen, I pause and know it’s going to be for my good.

Walking into Radiation this morning, I was feeling a lot of emotions. This is my last week, and I only have two more treatments. I didn’t choose this Cancer path, but it’s been an incredible journey. The people who have come into my life because of it will be forever in my heart. My technicians said they are happy for me, but will miss me. I feel the same.

It was a beautiful drive home. The sky was mesmerizing, and I was gazing at it thinking, “Only God could make a sky like that.” I made a mental note to stop at the post office to pick up a package that was delivered yesterday. It is a red, silicone honey dipper with a stainless steel handle. My daughter had bought a beautiful jar of honey a couple of weeks ago, not knowing this would be needed. One thing leads to another.

Pulling into the post office parking lot, I see my daughter’s car, and her getting out of it. We started laughing at the irony of both of us having the same idea. I backed out of the parking lot, and headed home. She pulled in a short amount of time afterwards, and I waited as she unloaded her car. First came Numi, who came galloping across the yard when she saw me. Then I watched my daughters arms and hands fill up holding mail and, and to my delight, our favorite coffee. She had gone to Lockhart before the post office.

She had already told me she was making brunch. Around here, we don’t do three meals a day. We do brunch, and graze on healthy snacks until dinner. Here is a pic of our brunch.

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We sit down and eat every meal together. It should look like a special occasion in my opinion, and each meal does. There has not been a paper napkin in our home in years.

My radiologists asked me this morning, “What are your plans for today?” I responded, “No plans. I’m just going to let things happen.” That within itself is a very good plan.

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Barbara is a Writer, a Mom to her 17-year-old daughter, and she loves God. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. She found out in March of 2016 that she had Breast Cancer. She has completed Chemo, and is going through Radiation. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

Present Moment, Quality of life

To Embrace Change

When I was a child, I would watch my Mother dust the bottom of our furniture. The legs of every chair, and up underneath the piece. It was very odd, and I swore I would never do that!

My daughter saved a baby lizard the other night from his doom. It was stuck up under a chair, so she released him, and took him outside. It was a mystery to me how he was stuck, and then she told me he was in a cobweb. That is when I remembered what Mother was doing. Dusting the cobwebs. Have you noticed they come around right before Halloween?

Just like the cobwebs are a sign of the changing season, I made a lot of changes to my environment over the past few days. My little dog wasn’t sure about them though. The first thing I noticed was his behavior around the furniture being moved in the den. His main concern was his rug was now moved. What’s funny is, I moved the rug with him in mind.

We have hard wood floors, which is another reason for the cobwebs. No carpet to hide in. My little dog Mochee doesn’t like laying on the hard wood, so he has always laid on the rug in front of the front door. This puts him far away from where my daughter and I usually are.

In our favorite chairs! When I rearranged the furniture, I put that rug in front of our chairs. Now, when we are in our chairs, he can lay in front of us. He was distraught when he saw that the rug was moved. He paced back and forth looking at the new design, but he just wasn’t sure. I watched him do this for quite a while. It doesn’t take much to entertain me.

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Then he got it. The room had changed, but the change had his best interests at heart. When we make a change, it will most likely effect someone else in our life. I enjoy change, and my daughter has grown to enjoy it too. They can see it makes life better, but it’s up to them to embrace it or not. Mochee laid down on the rug, but watched the front door from afar.

Once I rearranged the living area, I kept on moving stuff. I rearranged artwork, moved accessories to a new spot, and found better uses for things I had that were not being used well.  I was sorta concerned about my daughter getting home while I was out running errands. She might have walked in and thought she was at the wrong house. That’s change.

Embrace it. Don’t let your life get stale. Keep things moving, and in good working order. Use everything God has given you to the best of your ability, and above all, enjoy the beauty.

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Present Moment, Quality of life

Use Your Gifts

I love the little things God prompts me to write about. I don’t particularly enjoy telling on myself, but that is part of writing. To share what we see, and where we’ve been in hopes of encouraging others. I write about having a beautiful life, but God just whacked me with this.

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It was almost a month ago, my daughter gave me these gorgeous house shoes. They are so pretty, the brand name is, “Pretty You.” I was so excited to receive them, that I slid them on and walked across the room. They didn’t feel snug like my other house shoes. The bottoms were slippery, and they felt light and fluffy. I thanked her profusely, and sat them in my room.

I sat them on my vanity, where I could see them. Anytime I looked that way, I could enjoy how pretty they are. Like so many other things in my life, they were nice to look at. The only difference was they actually have a function. So, I moved them from the bedroom to the den.

We walk through, or sit in the den a good bit during the day. I even gave them their own chair to sit in, so they’d be off the floor. I was being pretty careful with them, as I tried to decide when to wear them. Do you ever know what you want to do, but it takes time to do it?

Well, today was that day. I slid my feet in and left them on.

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My daughter saw them sitting in the chair in the den and was concerned. We have this saying that, if you’re not using it, or it’s not bringing you joy, then give it away. It will bring someone else joy. She asked if she needed to return them, or give them away. I was obviously breaking our golden rule. They were so pretty to look at, but why couldn’t I use them?

They brought me joy just by looking at them across the room. I think we are a lot like that with the gifts God has given us. We’re perfectly happy just having the gift, or desire, but we’re leery of stepping out in faith and using it. I know I am guilty of keeping mine in the room, but not using them to the fullest extent. Stained glass is one that God is nudging me toward.

I fell in love with stained glass 20 years ago. A friend of mine had started making it, and what started out as a hobby, grew into a full blown workshop/studio. That was the day God planted the seed. I have not forgotten how it made me feel to see the light shining through the glass. It was so beautiful, and a spectacular way to bring beauty to other peoples lives.

A couple of years ago, I took a class on how to make it. My most favorite job ever was working in a custom frame shop, and cutting the glass made me feel alive! The sound of the glass cutter scoring the glass, and then breaking the excess glass away. There’s a vulnerability working with glass, knowing it could hurt you if you don’t respect it’s power.

Fast forward to today, and I have everything I need to make stained glass. It’s in a cabinet, and has been laid out many times and worked with, but back in the cabinet it goes. I have people around me that support my dream, but what is keeping me from using it? Because it’s new, somewhat uncomfortable, and I’m happy with knowing it’s in the cabinet.

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After I took a picture of my feet in the slippers, I flipped them over to look at the sole. This is where God just drilled it on home for me. Above the PY, for Pretty You, it says, “Love What You Do!” That is my mantra, “Do what you love and love what you do!” If that wasn’t enough, on the heel is a crown, and a heart. Two other things I preach about quite often.

I’m still wearing the slippers, and not sure when I’m going to take them off. They are starting to feel good now like they were made for me. What is God showing you today? Are your dreams in a cabinet? Are you gazing at the beauty in your life from across the room? We only get this one life, so if the shoe fits, wear it. Now I take the beauty with me wherever I go.

 

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Barbara is a God follower, a Writer, and Mom to her 17-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Part of her mission is to show people they can start over at 50. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

A Better Life, Present Moment, Quality of life

A Better Life~Day One

I was talking to a friend a while back about Letting Go. She still harbors some anger toward her ex-husband, so I offered assistance. She said, “I’m not sure I wanna let go! Sometimes I use it as fuel to get stuff done.” At first I laughed, but afterwards, I could totally relate.

The suggestion below is from the book, “A Better Way To Live“, by Og Mandino. This series is entitled, “A Better Life”, because to have ‘a better life’, you need, ‘a better way to live.’ There are 17 suggestions in this book. Hopefully, they will encourage, and cause ponder to the path we’re on. I will be writing about each one, which gives us roughly one a week until the end of the year.

Suggestion #1.

Count your blessings. Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play, and you will finally be able to move forward toward the life God intended for you…with grace, strength, courage, and confidence.

Do you know you are valuable?

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This is one of my favorite Memes. I love how it has a child displayed, instead of a grown person. We are supposed to have child-like faith, and know that we are valuable. We are the child of the one true King! He already says we are more valuable than the birds, (Matt. 6:26), and they are well taken care of everyday. Have you ever seen a stressed out bird? I haven’t.

My daughter reads my Blog usually before I publish it. She’s my Editor. She read the one I wrote earlier this week about, How to Have a Beautiful Life, and claimed it as one her favorites. When we devalue ourselves it should be disturbing. Otherwise we are settling for less than God’s very best for us. Your spirit should give you some signs to what this feels like.

For me, I feel a sadness in my heart. Like something is taking up space, but not fulfilling me anymore. At one time this was a welcome addition to my beautiful life, but now it adds no beauty or life. I remember what it feels like to get disturbed, and make a decision not to take it anymore. If you feel devalued, I give you permission right now to let it disturb you.

Once you make a decision to let it go, you will feel lighter. Everything that Og says in the suggestion above will occur. Some people are afraid to let go of what they have because it’s better than having nothing. In my experience, God always has better in store. By letting go of what we have that doesn’t bring us joy, we’re trusting God that He has more.

 

 

 

mescarf (135x240)Barbara is a God follower, a Writer, and Mom to her 17-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Part of her mission is to show people they can start over at 50. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

Quality of life

How To Have A Beautiful Life

I woke up this morning pondering how different my life is today, compared to a few years ago. Why is it so beautiful now? Why was it so miserable before? Here is what came to mind.

I believe we all have a beautiful life, filled with God’s goodness. Now, whether or not we can see it, is the question. I couldn’t see mine. The marriage I was in for 25 years, had taken a sharp turn after 15 years. I was sober. By taking the drink away, I was able to unbecome. Staying for 10 more years was a struggle between where I was, and where I knew I could be.

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Many of you have asked about the book I am writing. This is what it will be about. How to have a beautiful life. It took me until I was 50 to figure this out, so hopefully, some of you younger readers can get a clue quick. You already have a beautiful life. It’s just covered up.

Change your thinking and change your life. I thought I was doing what I was supposed to be doing. Staying in a marriage for the sake of the children. Well…hello…When your kids know you are miserable, and watch you live in sadness, does that give them a spectacular life? No.

I’ve listened to a lot of motivational CD’s over my lifetime. One day, some things I had heard over the years came to the forefront of my mind. Tony Robbins was one of them.

Tony said, “Get disturbed. You’re not going to stand it any longer”

“What disturbs you in your life?”

“What are you going to do about it today?”

I wasn’t disturbed anymore, even though my life was very disturbing! We become complacent, like it’s okay to live with the hand we are dealt. Well, I’m here to tell you, it’s not okay. I pondered if this was the very best God had planned for me. Where was God?

Oh, He was there, watching and waiting. This was not the life He had planned. This was the life I had created. Then Joyce Meyer’s words came to mind, right after Tony’s. I had heard on one of her CD’s, “Make a decision, so God can get in line and help you.” That was all I needed to hear. I needed to let my disturbing life actually disturb me, and make a decision.

 

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A Beautiful Soul sent me this Meme this morning. Thank you Danielle. It reminded me of the book, and being willing to admit what I went through to uncover the beauty in my life. It wasn’t pretty, but digging through the mess allows space for the beauty to breakthrough.

Get disturbed, and make a decision.

I had stopped getting angry. My husband was so angry about everything, you could feel it a mile away. So, I stayed calm because anger fuels more anger. He was miserable too, but didn’t know how to fix it. I did us both a favor the day I left even though he didn’t see it at first. Sometimes things do have to fall apart completely, so they can fall back together.

I believe we both have a beautiful life today, even though we’re apart. When Tony asked, “What disturbs you in your life?”, it was my whole life. I had to blow it up, and start all over again. It felt like I had lost everything that made life worth living, but I was still standing there, so, what was it time to do? Get disturbed, make a decision, and light the fuses.

 

mescarf (135x240)Barbara is a God follower, a Writer, and Mom to her 17-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Part of her mission is to show people they can start over at 50. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

Present Moment, Quality of life

Keep Fighting What

I backslid this morning and went down to the corner store for a cup of coffee. I’ve barely had any coffee with this round of Chemo. The trip to the store wasn’t about coffee after all.

Three days ago, I wrote a Blog and mentioned a song by Phillips, Craig, and Dean. Randy Phillips have been associated with a church in Austin, TX called Promiseland for years.  Standing at the counter of the store this morning, a lady walked up and started talking to me. I had met her before, and it was such a blessing just to take the time to catch up.

We walked outside, and she said something that quickly got my attention. She asked if I was familiar with Promisland Church Austin, and I told her yes. They are bringing a satellite church September 11th to Lockhart, TX. Literally 10 minutes from where I live. We exchanged phone numbers and made plans to go together. So glad I went for that coffee.

This is how God moves in my life.

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I saw this Meme earlier this week and saved it. Didn’t really know why at the time, but today, it makes sense. I noticed that this round of Chemo was trying to kick my butt. I’ve been on a vicious cycle of eating, and sleep the week of, and my quality of life was suffering.

My daughter was visiting a friend last weekend, and this gave me time to ponder who I wanted to be, versus who I was becoming. I was allowing my current circumstances to dictate my quality of life. This was crap. I am better than this, so Monday morning things changed. I made a list of what I wanted to accomplish and started working on the list.

I’ve acquired a new curiosity for life. The things I listed are things God has shown me, that I had put on the back burner due to lack of energy. It was time to look at what I wanted, who I wanted to be, and get to work. My body has been through hell, and I’ve been caring for the inside with good nutrition. It was time to show some care to the outer shell, so Yoga began.

I started doing Yoga 3 years ago and loved it. It makes my body happy, and I’m a firm believer in using your body to strengthen itself. This lead to reading more about it, and downloading some other books that I’ve been curious about. Strengthening the mind, and body so to speak. I got everything accomplished on my list, so today we have a new one.

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Rebuilding myself from where I am today. People have often said to me, “Keep fighting.” That sounded strange because it didn’t feel like a fight. The Chemo was fighting the Cancer, but I discovered what I was fighting for was my life. Not to get lost in the circumstances, and not to become my circumstances. I am not the same woman I was in March. I am better.

I said to someone yesterday, “This has been a remarkable journey.” He said, “I’ve never heard it described that way before.” That is probably true because it’s easy to let the Chemo become bigger than you. Get curious about life again. Muster up all the strength you have and use it to start over. This journey is coming to an end, but it took me straight to a new one.

 

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Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 17-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Part of her mission is to show people they can start over at 50. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

Present Moment, Quality of life

You’re Not Alone

My daughter went to visit a girlfriend Friday evening, and she’s coming home today. I was all alone, but I wasn’t lonely. There is nothing wrong with alone time, and sometimes it’s much needed. We are the only person we actually have in this world, so we need to like us.

I read a comment earlier by a lady on Facebook, and it took me back in time. She has been in an unhappy marriage, for 30 years, and just couldn’t take it anymore. I was in a marriage for 25 years, and I remember that feeling. Once I made the decision to leave, it was like everything lined up in the Universe, and it all fell into place. It wasn’t easy, but so worth it.

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I believe this Meme to be true. I couldn’t see any way out of that marriage. All I saw were roadblocks, and impossibilities. I had no money to speak of, and no family to help, but God had a way. The first thing on my list, was to find a place to live. My daughter found a house for rent an hour away from where we lived. It was like the owners were just waiting for us.

We moved in 30 days later, and my daughter and I relearned how to relax, and enjoy life.

That became part of my mission. To show people they can have a beautiful life after 50. I believe some think 50 years old is too late to start over, but it’s not. If anything it’s rather sweet to have all this life experience, and start your life over. I’ve done less stupid things.

Doing what I see possible, hands the baton to God to do the impossible.

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Stress is worrying God can’t do His job . When we depend on Him, and trust His plan, there is no stress. Unless we decide to stress ourselves out with the unknowing of it all. As I was sitting alone yesterday, I reminded myself, everything I need comes from God, not man. He promises to never leaves us, or forsake us, and I believe our part is to never leave Him.

Something else I thought of as I sat alone, was a song by Phillips, Craig and Dean. “You Are God Alone“, is the name of the song. I love the lyrics, and will share some of the with you.

You are not a god
Created by human hands
You are not a god
Dependent on any mortal man
You are not a god
In need of anything we can give
By Your plan, that’s just the way it is

[Chorus]
You are God alone
From before time began
You were on Your throne
Your are God alone
And right now
In the good times and bad
You are on Your throne
You are God alone

From before time began, God was God alone. He is not in need of anything from us, because He is God. I love the way it says, “That’s just the way it is.” No explanation needed. Even in my alone time, I am not alone. My hope is that you know, even if you feel alone, you’re not.

 

mescarf (135x240)

Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 17-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Part of her mission is to show people they can start over at 50. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

Present Moment, Quality of life

Them Three Days

This is the first time, in three days, I’ve turned on my laptop. I pulled back my bedroom drapes this morning, just to make sure there was still a world. I’ve been asleep for 3 days.

Before Chemo, this would never have happened. Oh sure, I could take a nap every now and then, but to allow my body to curl up and just sleep? A toothache was the culprit, but is getting better. I have heard that Chemo is hard on your teeth, but I wasn’t prepared for this.

I lit some of my favorite candles, and just went with it.

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My sponsor told me years ago, a lot can happen in 3 days. She would always suggest, waiting 3 days before making any monumental decisions, or taking action. Something would happen to give me a revelation, or the time would cause it’s importance to fall away.

One thing I wanted to accomplish this week was give my daughter a ‘Birthday week.’ I don’t believe I’ve ever done it before, maybe when she was little, but she turns 17, August 8th. So, I went around to different shops, and collected 7 little things I thought she would like. Little things to remind her of who she is, where we’ve been, and where we’re headed.

Even with this nasty toothache, God woke me up these last three days, to give her one.

I had the clarity of mind, to write a note about the item, which is all the writing I’ve done, up until now. I loved writing her the note more than anything, because the words just flowed from my heart to hers. She got choked up a couple of times, but there should be emotion in our writing. I’m so grateful to have been able to do that for her each day.

Today is Day 3, of her birthday week, and I’m having trouble deciding what to give her next. I’m thinking it will be the LED sign that says, “No Regrets.” I want her to know at this young age, to live a life of no regrets. That means doing things that scare you sometimes, like Chemo, but I can honestly say, I have no regrets in my life. Just keep living, loving, and learning.

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Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 16-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. She found out in March of this year that she has Breast Cancer. Going through Chemo, and believing God for a miracle is where she stands. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com