In Walk like Wind, I wrote about my hesitation of being tall. That’s what I was really getting at with yesterday’s post. Wearing the boots make me even taller, but I’m embracing it.
We are each uniquely made, so we don’t have to try and be different. We already are.
I came home to a vase full of sunflowers sitting on the table. I saw these the other day at the market and thought about buying them for my daughter. They have always been her favorite flower, but now that she’s 20, I thought she may have outgrown them and didn’t buy them.
Her father had the same idea, and he bought them for her. There’s still that little girl inside of her that loves them. Where’s that kid inside of you? What do they still want to be? You’re not too old and your time hasn’t passed.
It’s time to embrace that unique quality and you be you.
Yesterday, while writing Feel the Music, Lewis Capaldi began singing a cover of the Miley Cyrus song, The Climb. It’s one of my favorite songs and yes, I love Miley. She went through a major growth phase and being a celebrity, we got to watch.
To find our true selves, we need to peel back the layers of life we’ve accumulated. It’s a messy process, but I want to find that woman God wants me to be. She’s in there, on this journey with me.
How did I get to where I am today? I began months ago.
Since moving out of the country, and into civilization, there are endless opportunities to plug-in. I saw signs that God had me right where He wanted me, but oh, this little prayer!
“”What do I want to do?’ can be, “Dear God, what would you have me do?”
One thing leads to another. One conversation with the right person leads to another conversation with another person.
Stepping away from social media has me stepping out of my house each day.
This is my kinda midlife. Marianne Williamson writes,
“At midlife, you suddenly see an endgame where you used to see an endless stretch. You know now on a visceral level that this lifetime will not go on forever. There’s no more time for five-year detours. No more time for getting it wrong. No more time for relationships that don’t serve, or for staying in situations that aren’t authentically you.”
I was mopping earlier, and had a revelation. When you are focused on a task, He whispers. It used to happen while vacuuming, but this house has carpet in only one room. He knows it gonna take longer than one room for me to hear Him, so it’s while mopping.
Change starts from within. If you have a situation in your life that your gut, or instinct feels unease about, look in the mirror. How long do we allow it linger before addressing it? I purchased a couple of online courses this year, and didn’t complete them. These courses were offered on a donation basis, so there again, not a lot of money.
There was a time I thought you had to invest a lot of money for it to be meaningful, but I no longer believe that. The lesson is always worth the price, no matter how large, or how small. We just need to complete the lesson.
I saw a shift in my writing after we returned home from Missouri. It’s like I have this new, non Cancerous body, but God is still trying to get down to the good stuff.
My best guess as to why I didn’t complete those lessons is…I was uncomfortable. They hit something within that I wasn’t ready to see. So, I grabbed my planner, and wrote that in there. Complete the lessons! Then of course my mind was flooded with all the ‘what if’s.’
I’m going to stifle the ‘what if’s’ today, and roll in obedience to God. Whatever it is I wasn’t willing to see before, I am ready to see now. To begin any change, acceptance is a good place to start. I want to make sure to complete the lesson.
There is a reason it feels good to be loved when we are going through pain. That is why we go to a funeral home, to see the family of the deceased, to show them we care and help them through their loss.
I love the way SC Lourie writes. It’s like her very soul breathes and forms words on paper. Plus, she begins each writing with the word, ‘darling’, in the opening line. Being from Texas, I find that to be sweet.
Do you ever feel accused of changing?
We do change, but I believe it’s a peeling process. God creates us to be whole and promises that we are enough. The outside world comes at us and our being can become hidden. Do we allow the world to change us, which is stealing our natural state of being, or do we continually look inside and release new parts of what was already there?
I believe love is very healing. No matter what has happened in our past, if we can come to terms with who we really are, and love ourselves, healing begins. To let go of every negative feeling and thought, and what other people think and say about us. To get to know your one true self and be good with sitting in your own skin.
I look back at this journey I began a couple of years ago, and it’s miraculous seeing the life I have today. It’s not what I did so much as what I gave up. Letting go of past hurts, peoples words and opinions of me.
If they’re talking about the person they once knew, I’m not her anymore. I was in there all along, but time, love and patience is bringing her out to bloom. I had to stop being what others wanted me to be, and just be me.
I write about beauty and this life God has given me.
Sometimes I can be my own worst enemy. Overthinking any given phrase can cause me to pick apart a conversation. The handful of people I surround myself with would be better off if I would choose the correct role and stay there. My daughter wants a Mom and not a Coach. She will tell me often, “Stop coaching me.” It’s what I do, not who I am.
The one thing I Coach about more than anything else is ‘happiness.’ I enjoy numerous levels of happiness, but some people have none. My passion is to help people find the right level for themselves. What is the biggest culprit of zero happiness? Other people. Yes, people happen.
God places people in my path wherever I go that need encouragement, even at the grocery store. They just gravitate toward me and I enjoy it very much. Sometimes it’s just to listen to their problems, or to assist them in unloading their cart. You know you have a person in desperate need when all they want is a hug.
It’s important to have at least one person in your life who knows and loves your authentic self. I can lose myself in what I do, but I have a friend in North Carolina who knows me very well. She finds it humorous that I would not have one animal, and today, I am Sweeping Dog Hair.
She gently reminds me of who I am, how far I’ve come and how God wants to use me. We need at least one person who believes in us. Then it’s all good.