Timing and Expectations

My daughter has left to go visit her Father, so let the weekend begin! Let’s see how long it takes her to realize, she left her favorite CD’s in the CD player at home. Thank you Darling!

As she drove away, I turned on the stereo to listen to this song I’ve been bingeing on for a month. You can hear it on Feel the Music. This song soothes me even though it makes the house vibrate. Gotta love a good stereo, and sub woofer.

unplug

This weekend I am taking a social media fast. Social Media and I have had a long loved, and unloved relationship. It has been good for me, and not so good. Spending the weekends, doing whatever I wanna, the timing feels right to take this break. Will let you know next week what it taught me.

Life has a lot to do with timing, and expectations. They are our teachers. I have high expectations for myself, but realize everyone’s expectations vary. We can be our own worst enemy, so my weekends are spent being extra kind to myself.

Something social media has given me are Memes. Friends tease me about my life being one, big Meme. I love them, and will eventually make a Meme compiled with all my favorite quotes, but I almost allowed a complete stranger turn me against them altogether. This happened a year ago.

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Searching for Memes to post on Letitgocoach Facebook page, I was becoming burned out over seeing the same ones. There had to be better, and more, is what I felt in my heart. I found an online software that was free, and user-friendly, and began making my own, like the one above.

My heart was right, but I had no clue what I was doing. All I knew was, they should be pretty, and say something that you don’t see everyday. Looking for Memes to share, there were times the saying was almost what I wanted, but not quite. Or, I would find the perfect one, and it would have a typo in it.

This online software was not the best, or the most popular to use, but it was simple. It had limited choices for font, and pics. It didn’t stop me though. Between my daughter’s photography, and Google, I could find pics. The software provided freedom to share whatever I felt led to share, but they didn’t look like ordinary Memes. Here’s one of the first.

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One of my first Memes.

One of my favorite meditative readings is a book by Melodie Beattie entitled, “Journey to the Heart: Daily meditations on the Path to Freedom.” Googling quotes from the book, pulled up very few Memes, but that is what I wanted to share. It wasn’t going to change the world, but it could make a difference. Then, in walked the stranger with my lesson.

My Facebook page was growing, and this guy that owns a couple of pages decided he would help me out. He sent a message, and here it is copied and pasted in it’s original format. His personal info has been omitted for anonymity. “If I may suggest, your messages are great, just need to work little on your images. Use picmonkey for editing images Pixabay for images and pintrest for free fonts and quotes.”

I thanked him for his advice, and did more research. Was his comment discouraging, or encouraging? I saw it as both.

Having done research beforehand, I knew of his suggestions, and they were not what I wanted. The one I was using was simple, and had everything right there, it just needed to offer more. Recently, I went back to his pages to see if his style had changed, and it had. The Memes were all black and white.

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From SC Lourie’s journal, “How the Light Gets Out.”

One year later, and full circle. Looking through SC Lourie’s journal, and wanting to share. I pulled up the Meme software to see if they had made any changes, or if it still existed. There it was with many new enhancements. It just took time. They know they have a good thing going, but they also know it can always be better. The one above is for my new Blog.

It’s not about being perfect, or pleasing other people. It’s about what makes YOU happy. Learning to take constructive criticism is a work in progress, but it makes me want to do better, and be the best I can be. Making memes is fun, and it’s one of the best, and free ways to advertise who you are.

Just for grins, I Googled Letitgocoach, clicked on images, and there they are! A lot of what has been posted here, or used on Letitgocoach Facebook is displayed on Google. Even some of the early ones! (slight cringe) Well, here ya go Google. Latch onto one of my faves! Much love lovelies!

whatyoudeserve

God Uses Scraps

The saying, “Big Hot Mess”, has new meaning to me. I just watched a video by Steve Harvey, and he broke it down simply. Let’s see if I can do the same.

I like simple. There is nothing fancy about me, but I’m happy. I had fancy, but my life was not a happy life. I could walk through my home, and see pretty things, but I couldn’t look in a mirror.

You see, my then husband and I were living above our means. We were buying all these beautiful, expensive things, and putting them on credit cards. That will be in the book I’m writing, but I haven’t needed to use a credit card in 5 years. Lesson learned.

Steve Harvey used to work for Ford Motor Company. He was a foundry which builds the engine block. The block is the foundation of the engine. You have to have a solid block before adding pieces to the engine. It all begins with scraps. Twenty something years later, Steve is a spokesman for Ford.

Ford uses scrap metal to build their engine blocks. The scraps are laying in a junk yard, and look useless. Are you underneath a pile of junk? Like some of the things that are happening in your life right now feel overwhelming? You may be in the furnace being melted, so God can use you!

hotmessWhen I was willing to let all that stuff go. To walk out of the glass house I had built for myself, it was like God said, “Yay! There you are. Let’s get to work!!!”

You see, I was a mess. I felt like a car that had been wrecked. I was so tired of keeping up with the Jones’, and I didn’t even know anybody with the last name Jones!

All the pieces of my past. Everything I had been through were piling up. I was my own personal junkyard, and the pile was getting pretty intense! Then here comes God.

Steve Harvey showed a video of how an engine block is made. They would dump all that scrap metal into a fiery furnace, and it would melt down into liquid form. A machine would pour the liquid into a mold, and here comes my favorite part…A giant claw would come by and grab the mold! Have you been melted down, and then grabbed by God?

Well, hold on tight baby cuz this is where it gets good!!!

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Going through Breast Cancer last year changed me. I had been writing for three years, and felt like I was doing okay with it. Those three years were my ‘push ups’.

Can you do pushups? They start out small, but the more you do them, the better it gets. What starts out with 5 pushups, goes to 10 pretty soon, and as long as you keep doing it, (like writing, and publishing each Blog), you are at 100 before you know it.

Well, I had written over 350 posts, and found out I have Cancer. I wrote less last year, but when I could think, I wrote. God was refining me. He used what I was going through not only to encourage others, but to melt me down, and pour me into His mold for me.

When I first started writing, I was covered in junk. Writing has been a very healing process, but you see, I was choosing what to write. I was picking up a piece from the top of the pile, and writing about that. I would ask God to bless it and write it.

Then after doing so many pushups, I was getting stronger but not becoming more brave. I was not brave enough to share the really good stuff. The stuff that was painful to share. That is where Cancer came in. Through Cancer, God made me brave.

Steve mentions in the video that once the hot liquid becomes solid, his job was to hit it with a sledgehammer. Wait….I’m having a Pat Benatar moment.

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After about 3 weeks into Chemo, I would come home and pass out. It started off slow and was a gradual buildup of the toxins invading my body to kill that major toxin. Once I had more of the bad stuff in me, than good, God would hit me with his mighty hand.

Like a sledgehammer.

People would ask me what it felt like to have Chemo. I would sorta laugh and tell them, “It feels like being hit by something a lot bigger than me!” My God is big!

Steve would hit the block with a sledgehammer, to make sure it was solid. To make sure there were no air holes, or loose pieces. Then here comes the best part. If it passed the test….wait, did you get that? Let me write it in bold for ya….”If it passed the test…“, the block would continue down the conveyor belt and start receiving additional pieces.

Am I preachin good? We have to be solid before God will add anything else!!!

If you have made it this far into what I’ve been trying to share, you are a Badass! This is probably one of my longer ones, but it has been spirit led. I will not put any restraints on what God wants me to share. No more picking what to write from the top of the pile.

I know you have already spent a good chunk of your time with me, and I am grateful, but if you can spare 30 more minutes, here is the video by Steve Harvey. Be blessed.

Feel the Music

This song came to mind as I was driving to my mammogram appointment Thursday.

As I mentioned in “Test of Faith“, Seymour saw me as ‘suffering in silence’, during the Chemo part of my Breast Cancer Journey. I did get quiet during The Red Devil part, but I want to assure you, I saw every message, email, and text come into my phone. It was laying on the bed beside me, and would sometimes wake me up from the vibration of love.

My daughter’s bedroom is across the hall, and I heard her playing this song, as it floated across into my room. Those last two doses of Red Devil had me under a spell, and this song described exactly how I felt physically. In the song, he is talking about leaving/dying, which I knew I wasn’t, but I was thinking. “This is what it feels like when people die.”

It’s not that we want to be alone, and thanks to you, we don’t feel alone. I would pick up my phone, and look at it with one eye closed, trying to focus on the screen, but it hurt my eyes. I could see, and feel the love, but could not physically respond for several days.

Thank you for the love, as I laid there and let God fight my battle.

I dedicate this song to the loved ones that want to help, but don’t know how. Your presence is known, even if it’s not acknowledged. We’re just soggy from the Chemo.

PS. Twenty-One Pilots remade this song as a tribute to ‘My Chemical Romance’, who is the original artist.