Close the Door

This weekend my bedroom door fulfilled it’s purpose. I can count on one hand how many times this year I’ve closed my bedroom door. It’s been used, but not as a door.

I hang my winter robe on the top-left corner, so it’s readily available every morning as I walk through the door. The door handle is dripping with handbags that I’ve been wanting to sell or give away for months. Today the door stands clean and ready to be used as an actual door when needed.

Photo by Storiès on Unsplash

What prompted this revelation? Two dogs and a cat.

I first noticed it while responding to a friend’s Marco Polo. I get excited when I talk and my voice reflects it. While trying to record the Marco Polo, our cat would try to sit in my lap, or he would stalk me if I were walking while talking. It became a distraction and I’d lose my train of thought.

Over the weekend someone called and I was excited to hear their voice, but this time here comes two dogs and a cat, circling around my feet with excitement too! It reminded me of how kids know when you’re on the phone and will appear with the most urgent of need at that very moment.

These toddlers have four legs.

I retreated to my bedroom, but they came scurrying in. I grabbed everything hanging on the bedroom door and tossed it on the bed. Scooted their furry butts out of my room, and slowly shut the door. The door slid into place with a click, and a soft thump. I liked the sound it made when it shut. Click, thump and then silence. I’ll keep it cleared off so it can serve it’s purpose, and may we always know my darling when it’s time to close the door.

Writing gives us a place to say what we need to say, but also to hear what we need to hear.

Julia Cameron-A Right to Write

Stay the Path

I slept through the night. That in itself is a miracle.

I woke up thinking about a Blog I wrote lastnight before bed entitled, How to Fly. I wanted to pull it up, and delete it because I wasn’t happy with it. Since when is this Blog about me? I just write what’s on my heart.

It’s Tuesday, but I don’t have Chemo. Week two begins of the three week break. There is no feeling of dread this morning. No dark cloud following me around. It’s a new day full of possibilities, and more healing.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned about life it’s this. There is a reason, and a season for everything. God doesn’t reveal the reason for the season while you’re in it, but as you stay the path, it becomes more clear.

A season can last a long time.

I have a friend that has been battling Breast Cancer a lot longer than me. To look at her circumstances, it seems to be getting worse, and not better. Let me tell you that God gives His biggest battles, to His toughest soldiers.

When her battle is over, it’s going to be obvious that God did for her what she couldn’t do for herself.

I have another friend that is in a season of quiet. She doesn’t feel she is being used by God.

This woman has been used by God her entire life. She introduced me to a church that reconnected me to God, and she was my daughter’s Nanny for a short time. She brought joy and laughter to our lives, and years later, she still does.

When you are in a season of quiet, that stinkin’ Devil will walk in and make you doubt every aspect of your life.

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I have been in a season of quiet for a long time. Going through Chemo has made it challenging to write. The toxins alone mess with your mind and body, and give ample opportunity for the devil to kick you while you’re down.

I started questioning my mission, and pondered maybe I should stop writing. Am I reaching people, or helping them in any way? I have to believe that God will use this Blog to encourage others. Even if I just reach one.

That same friend that isn’t feeling used by God, took time to encourage me yesterday.

She said she’s encouraged by my Blog.

She has said in the past that she always gets something out of it, and sometimes it feels like it’s written specifically for her. Well my friend if you are reading this, let me assure you that God is still using you. This writer that was doubting her ability to keep writing, has just written another Blog.