That’s My God

It’s the little things in life that never cease to amuse me. Standing at my kitchen window after an hour’s worth of steady rain, looking at the plants I just watered yesterday. A smile came to my lips as I chuckled at the conversation I was having with God in my heart.

The weather forecast wasn’t calling for rain, but I can’t rely on weather predictions. The best way to know the weather around here is by noticing what it’s doing. God wants to be noticed and it was like He was saying, “If you’d waited Barb, you would have seen my plan for those plants.” We have conversations like that more than we should.

I depend on God in every situation, but sometimes I run ahead. One of my most spoken prayers is, “Here’s my life. I lay it at your feet. Your will be done, not mine.” Then I go on about my day with my plans and actions, so I’m grateful when God shows up with a similar plan, only better.

Life is amusing when it comes down to my plan versus God’s plan, and it’s instances like these that continue to amuse me. That’s my God.

Lose The Stuff

One of the most memorable lessons I’ve learned is, don’t let your happiness depend on something you may lose. When my ex-husbands company moved without him, we lost our home to foreclosure and the ship began to sink.

Money has always been important to him. Growing up without having much, caused him to be highly motivated to have more. There is a lot of time and money that goes into having more. I grew up without a lot of material things, but Mama gave all the love she had. She told me she loved me all the time and gave the best hugs. I was loved.

I missed a lot of moments back then. My son’s life was Polo outfits, private schools and video games. I didn’t see much of my daughter. She had a nanny her first year and I wasn’t sure what to do with her after that.

My son’s life involved my drinking and my daughter’s did not. I got sober before I found out I was pregnant. God took my desire to drink completely away and He was watching as I lost everything else. Just like my drinking, it was for my best.

God watched as I lost everything that we worked had so hard for, so I thought. He was there the day I walked out of my marriage too. God had allowed us to accumulate all that stuff, but when the means to pay for it was taken away, there went the stuff. This happened to a lot of people when the economic crisis set in.

I pray that you have let go of your stuff.

My ex still has most of the stuff, but it’s not being enjoyed. He has spent all these years trying to get back what was taken from him. God says He will restore all that, and He has in my life. You would have thought it would have been the material things, but I live a very simple life today and love it.

It’s the moments God restored. I get to be with my daughter everyday with very little stress. We live a beautiful life and everything we need. All we need is God and one another. He wants us to depend on Him for every little thing and today, I do. The only way to lose everything now is to stop following God and that, I’m not willing to lose.