Tag: disappointed


It doesn’t take much to keep me happy, or content. Recently I noticed myself walking through the house at night barefoot and felt gratefulness. I haven’t done that in years.

My daughter and I have lived in houses nestled atop farmland. With farmland comes critters and at night a scorpion would sometimes make it’s way into the house. We learned quickly not to walk to through the house barefoot at night and carrying a flashlight was a necessity. If you saw something move across the floor, scream for assistance.

I became good at determining the various intensities of “Mom?!!!” She would stand still keeping an eye on the critter, as I retrieved a glass to sit over it. Once our heartbeats resumed normalcy, we’d devise a plan. It was a Team effort walking through the house at night, but today it’s thrilling to walk barefoot and not have to stare at the floor.

I’ve learned quite a bit about gratefulness and it doesn’t always begin as a positive impact. It doesn’t come gushing into our hearts and lives like gratitude. Gratefulness for me normally disguises itself as disappointment. When we pause in that moment and peel back the layers for a more in-depth look, we will see that in the end it was all a part of a greater plan.

Last week, a friend of mine posted a Duster style jacket on Facebook that was for sale in her shop. It caught my eye, and I gave myself the weekend to think about it, but vowed to stop by on Monday knowing I’d be in that part of town. I was excited to see the Duster and envisioned myself taking it home. When I walked into her shop, I saw the display hanging on the wall, like in the picture, but the jacket didn’t look the same. Maybe the original jacket sold because the one on display wasn’t my taste at all.

I left the store jacketless, but right alongside it came gratefulness.

I Am Free

There’s a song the Newsboys came out with years ago called, I Am Free. I used to stand on my pier in the early morning and scream this song st the top of my lungs. Almost two years later, God reminded me of this song this morning and where I am today. God has brought me a long way, but I still have far to go.

free I hold high expectations for myself, and that’s okay. It’s when our expectations of self, fall onto others that we get disappointed. God showed me in the early hours of morning, that by expecting people to treat me a certain way, limits their actions. Today, I’m taking all limits off my life.

Joyce Meyer used to say, “I don’t expect much. That way if I don’t receive much, I’m not disappointed.” I recoiled from that statement thinking it was extremely negative. I expect great things and serve a great God, but I was getting disappointed. With God? No. With people? Yes.

God never disappoints us. We can disappoint ourselves, or allow the actions, or lack thereof, of others to disappoint us, but God won’t do it. He’s incapable. When people treat us a certain way, if we like it, we cling to it. It brings additional happiness to our lives and we all want that. The flip side is, that limits them in treating us with all their capabilities. If they treat us a little bit good, which may seem like a lot depending on how hungry we are for goodness, are they capable of more?

God is. I have a very sweet life today and if I don’t limit God, I’m sure He has a lot more in store. Today, it would be difficult for me to handle much more than He’s already given me, but that is one of the great things about God. He won’t give us more than we can handle. I need to open my heart and mind, expand my capacity to receive more of God’s goodness. What He has to offer is only limited by me. Today, I free myself from any and all expectations from people and God. I am free.