Honoring the Light

Some people walk into our lives and never really leave. They are the chosen few who make an impact and stake a claim to a piece of our heart.

His name is Coyote. Cool name, right? He’s a cool human. I met him in Fearless where he was largely in charge. He laid the groundwork for me to start working with Zen Habits, and taught me everything I needed to know up to a point. I loved people’s expressions when I’d tell them, “I work with Coyote,” so when he told me he was leaving Zen Habits, I was devastated.

I’m still not over it.

I believe that’s the point though. Some people create a space in your heart and when they leave there’s a void. There’s no replacing Coyote, so we keep in touch. Instead of mentor and student, we get to be friends. He hosts an online meditation twice a week and I show up for at least one of them. It’s my way of honoring who he is by showing up in his life and supporting what he lays his hand and heart to.

I’d love for you to join us. He begins the guided meditation at 9:00 am central time, every Thursday and Sunday, and it lasts 20 minutes. He’s even going to host it Thanksgiving morning, and I can’t really think of a better way to express Thanksgiving than by meditating. I’ll place the details below.

Coyote [he/his] hosts a meditation Thursday and Sunday mornings at 7am Pacific, 10am Eastern, 3pm London, or 4pm CET. Join in a few minutes before this time as we start right at the hour. Here’s the Zoom link: https://zoom.us/j/6505206774 You can sign up for email reminders, and/or listen to previously recorded meditations here: https://coyotejackson.com/meditations/

Join us in honoring the light.

Love Me Back

A member of Fearless Warrior reached out to me wanting to know my whole story. She had read the About page on my Blog and said, “There’s a gap between leaving your marriage and where you are now.”

I tried to summarize the woman she knows today on a Zoom. There’s over 800 published posts between where it began and what you’re reading now. With every click of the publish button, I left ‘that me’ on the page. Each new day brought a newer me, so I told her, “It’s all in the Blog.” Writing is my therapy.

About a week ago, I found this meme and it pretty much sums up my life. When we leave a broken marriage, unhealthy relationship, or anything that’s not suited for our needs, there’s going to be a gap. It’s up to us how we choose to fill the void.

The options are endless, but you know I like to keep things simple. Instead of pulling something or someone from the outside in, I poured what I already had on the inside out. When I chose everyday to love my life, one day life decided to turn around and love me right back.

Do Great Things

The commitment I made to my writing is to complete two writing practices a day, whether I want to or not. Most days it flows through the fingers, but today it didn’t. One practice is equal to 30 minutes which is comparatively a Pomodoro. If you’re not familiar with the Pomodoro technique, you can learn more about it here.

If you’re familiar with this plug-in already, my hope is you’re sharing it with everyone you know who sits in front of a computer the majority of the day. It wasn’t always a happy moment to pull up my browser window for work, but now I look forward to it. I see a breathtaking photo, and receive a poke of encouragement from my browser.

Google Chrome Momentum Plug-in

I posted this on our Fearless Slack channel as a mighty revelation! A man chimed in on the post saying he uses this on all his browsers. I wish he had shared this with us. Sometimes we assume everyone knows what we know, and we’re hesitant to share. I’ve received countless comments from the simplest of shares.

After the motivational phrase it says, ‘Good morning, afternoon or evening Barbara’, dependent upon the time of day it is. It asks what you want to focus on today, and if there’s a project that needs completion, I type that in as a reminder, but most days it’s on a more personal level like writing! A tiny box is over to the left, so at the end of the day I get to check it off and watch it receive a strikethrough.

Pay attention to the small things and let God handle the big ones. Out of all the tasks I do each day, keeping this commitment to my writing feels like a really great thing.

In My Corner

We’ve been talking about creating spaces. Whether it’s wide open for an upcoming project, which may mean dismantling something you love, or an outdoor space to soak up nature and be available to whomever passes by. This corner was one of the first spaces created and the inspiration came from a Team member of Fearless Warrior.

In this spot you feel at ease, and there’s very little thinking required as the space stirs up creativity itching to be released. Some mornings I walk by it several times telling myself I don’t have time to enjoy it, but I’ve learned if I don’t sit there, my day suffers from not taking the time.

Nothing fancy. It’s literally a corner of the room.

But, it’s mine.

The chair is one of my favorite pieces, and it’s comfy to sit in, but not relaxing. That’s important because I don’t want to dwell there for long. I pour a cup of coffee or tea, place it on the window ledge and then sit in the chair to reflect on possibilities of the day ahead.

It takes about 30 minutes, and it varies each day. Sometimes I need to read, or simply jot down a few ideas, and at other times it’s a full on page of journaling to empty the mind. The ottoman is used to spread out inspiration bubbling up from my artistic side.

Do you have a corner? If not, let me encourage you to create one. The quality of the day begins in my corner.

Fire and Rain

I cleaned up the firepit area and ordered curved, metal benches for seating. They were lost during shipment and never arrived. I received a refund for the benches and chalked it up to, God has a better plan, once again!

I’m still looking at benches, but in the meantime, I planted a ground cover around half of the pit. When it rains it gets muddy, so the ground cover is taking root and starting to spread. A few days ago, I noticed something while watering with the rain head. If I start at the top, the water cascades around the half circle and they water one another.

I purchased the fire pit two years ago and you can read about it here. Watering the ground cover was a reminder of the vision I have for creating this space. To sit around this fiery pit with whoever needs watering. Whether it’s a neighbor walking by I’ve never met, or a friend I’ve known for years, we can gather here to refresh.

The meme used as the feature photo in this post was published in the Fearless Mastery FB page. The people in that group are called Firestarter’s who continually light their lives on fire. I help manage the page for Zen Habits, and these souls encourage one another in a manner which mimics fanning each other’s flame.

It’s exciting to surround ourselves with the Firestarter’s of life, but every so often even the fire is required to sit with the rain.

Wide Open Spaces

I dismantled my coffee bar.

Didn’t see that coming did ya? Neither did I, and it all fell apart so gracefully. It’s was about a month ago when I began to feel a tug at my heart every time I walked by it, so I knew this was coming. It’s like God always gives me a heads up before anything big is going to happen, and I was pretty quick to follow suit this time.

I was asked to take on a project by my guys over at Zen Habits, and it was an overwhelming thought at first. They want me to assemble, pack up and mail 24 gift boxes for their Fearless Mastery program participants before the end of September. Our house is less than 1,000 square feet, but I’m a big believer in, ‘you have everything you need.’

The space was there, it was just being used as a coffee bar. I took a day and moved coffee paraphernalia piece by piece to it’s new location near the kitchen. How did I know this was divine intervention? Because it all fell together seamlessly, and it’s better than before.

Chemex Coffeemaker

We’ll find our creativity in wide open spaces.

To Be Found

In November 2020, I wrote down 3 things to keep in mind for 2021. One has come to pass, and I’m working on the second one, but that third one is a daily ‘wait and see’.

I’m not the easiest person to love. I douse my front porch with glitter, and was recently granted permission to do the same to my neighbors driveway, so Barb is glittering up the neighborhood. I noticed the other day, I was showering with soap in the shape and smell of birthday cake.

You may think I’m kidding, but nope.

Buff City Soap-Life of the Party

What was the third thing I wrote down? To fall in love.

Dating apps have become entertainment for me, and I poke fun at myself on FaceBook. Last week, a girlfriend of mine was cheering me on for still being in the dating arena. We chatted and she shared that she stopped looking about a year ago. I cannot leave the dating arena yet because I made this tiny little deal with God. For me to fall in love, I had to be willing to put myself out there to be found.

God realizes I live a fairytale lifestyle, but this is one time He told me ‘no’. I fully expected a man to walk up to my front door holding my favorite cup of coffee, but that hasn’t happened. I know in my heart there is a man for me, but the odds are he’s not going to knock on the door. However, I do catch myself checking out every delivery man just in case God changes His mind. That doesn’t happen either.

That was the first step, and it was a scary one, but I’m determined to be fearless in putting myself out there to be found.

The Scattered Words

My Fearless community adds value to my life. On our Team call, I recommended the Morning Pages to a Team member, because I used to do them and saw value in them. Then I asked myself, “Why did you stop writing them Barb?”

My Fearless Team member ran with the idea, and has 3 weeks under his belt. He’s doing so well with it, he inspired me to start writing them again. The main reason I stopped was out of frustration. I couldn’t complete the 3 pages of longhand Julia recommends, but then I heard her voice say, ‘Grab three pieces of paper.’

I’d been using a notebook to write the morning pages, and it was uncomfortable to write in. It was bulky and larger than a regular piece of notebook paper. Eyeing the stack of notebook paper from my daughter’s school stash, I grabbed three pieces of paper and laid them on the table. As I began to write I felt my hand glide across the page and noticed it was resting flat on the table, not elevated by the thickness of the notebook. After completing page one, I went on to page two and then three!

Morning pages are to be written first thing in the morning, and it’s different than Blogging. These are thoughts not fully formed in the mind and feel scattered. Pen to paper helps pull them together and smooth them out. They are not to be shared with anyone, so you can say whatever you darn well please. I do this before anything else, even coffee, so there’s a commitment.

As soon as your eyes open you’ll need:

Three pieces of paper.

Your favorite writing utensil.

Staring out a window helps gather thoughts.

What better place to scatter words than onto an empty page? Be happy and well loved. ~Barb