Stork and Me

Three years ago, I told God I wanted nothingness. Just put me in nothingness. Well, it’s true when they say, “Be careful what you ask for. You just might get it!” He plopped me on 40 acres, with my daughter, and a new beginning.

piermcdadeWhen I knew it was past time for me to leave my marriage of 25 years, I prayed the God would show us where to go. At first, I was hoping my daughter and I would be able to stay in our home, and that my husband would leave. He wasn’t leaving, and I guess he thought I wouldn’t either. He had another thing coming.

I was so hungry for more. Beauty, peace, joy, happiness, and a life reflecting His very best. I couldn’t really fathom what that would look like, because He is God, but I knew it had to be better than where I had allowed myself to be. It was that faithful day, I was standing outside, and my daughter walked up to me and said, “Mama? Are you ever gonna smile again?” It was time for a huge leap of faith.

If you want to read all about Stork, and what He’s meant in my life, you can do so here. I believe God will give us signs we are on the right path. Stork has been mine.

storkI didn’t know where to go. Where would be our new home? My daughter started looking, and found a house an hour away from where we were. We looked at several houses, but none of them seemed quite right. When she found this one, I asked, “Where the heck is McDade, TX?” We drove to find out.

After looking at numerous houses, I was ready for a sign. I asked God to make it crystal clear, if this was going to be our new home. Make it obscenely obvious, because sometimes I need that. We met the man that owned the little house, at the house, and he showed us around. I knew it was when Mr. Rick said the exact same words as I had asked God. He said, “What do you think? Is this your new home?” Knocked me over.

It was still a scary process, waking up out in the middle of nowhere. We were surrounded by 40 acres, and lots of wildlife. Mr. Rick, and his wife, Patricia, lived across the pond from us, so we weren’t completely alone. God has His Angels firmly planted. I still laugh when I think back at the first time I called them at 2:00 am, after hearing footsteps on the porch.I-know

No honey, those were hooves, not feet. We had our first encounter with wild boar. “Stay inside”, she said. “They are just as afraid of you, as you are of them.” I wasn’t so sure. We bought a shotgun, but never had to use it. God had our backs.

Stepping out onto the front porch of that little house for the first time, coffee in hand, it looked just like nothingness. I asked God, “If this is where we’re supposed to be…If we are on Your path, You gotta show me something please.”

My eyes were drawn down to the left, where a pond and a pier stood still. At the end of that pier, was the most beautiful Great Blue Heron! He was just standing there majestically, with complete confidence, which at the time I didn’t have. He looked at me as if to say, “Good morning Dear. God sent me to tell you. Welcome home.” It was absolutely beautiful!

That was years ago, but Stork is still in my life today. While visiting Mr. Smith, and his lake was newly recovering from the drought, I gazed out my writing room window, and spotted him. Same stance, same message as before.

He is still here today, and I love watching him fly in to catch his breakfast. He doesn’t stay long, but just a glimpse is all I desire. Jeremiah 29:11 says it all Beautiful Souls. He has a good plan. If you are sitting in nothingness, it just might be your new home. That house is where God healed me from all the hurt from my past. That is where I became a Letting Go Coach.

That leap of faith was the first step of a new life, and a life of beauty. I don’t know if I will ever know what God’s very best looks like, but I’m going to enjoy the journey, and the little glimpses He gives. I’m obviously on the right path.

 

 

The Seeds of Success by Og Mandino

In this season of thankfulness, I want to share this.

Letitgocoach

God, I thank you for this day.

 

I know I have not accomplished as yet all you expect of me, and if that is your reason for bathing me in the fresh dew of another dawn, I am most grateful.

 

I am prepared at last, to make you proud of me.

 

I will forget yesterday, with all it’s trial and tribulations, aggravations and setbacks. The past is already a dream from which I can neither retrieve a single word nor erase any foolish deeds.

 

I will resolve, however, that if I have injured anyone yesterday through my thoughtlessness, I will not let this day’s sun set before I make amends, and nothing I do today will be of greater importance.

 

I will not fret the future. My success and happiness does not depend on straining to see what lurks dimly on the horizon, but to…

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Just Be Held

Sitting at my desk early this morning, I heard the chickens by my window. That would mean they were in the front yard, instead of the side. They had jumped the fence, looking for me because they had a need. I walked them back through the gate, gave them food and made a note to replenish their water. Isn’t that how life should be?

To be cared for. The only being I have found that consistently cares for me is God. There are no strings attached, no ultimatums, no scenarios, just seek Him and He’ll care for me. He provides my every need and loves me flaws and all.

pathI was driving home the other day, and Casting Crowns came on the radio. Driving down the road, I listened closely to this song entitled, Just Be Held. It made perfect sense to me. I had been where the song is describing, and I’m there again now. The song says, “Stop holding on and just be held.” That sounds simple, but it’s not easy.

The rest of the chorus says, “Your world’s not falling apart it’s falling into place. I’m on the throne, stop holding on and just be held.” I love that. Do you feel like your world is falling apart? I think it has to fall apart a little to fall back into place better.

We ask His forgiveness, forgive whoever disappointed us and then forgive ourselves. He never stopped loving us; we just need to forgive and move forward. That is the kind of love I seek. The kind that will encourage me to grow when I feel strong and when I’m not, I can just be held. The arms of God will never let you go.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 16 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Letitgocoach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is writing her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

Box of Love

When I began Blogging, my thought was, this is for my daughter Bailey. To have a place to go and read about our journey together. What goes on the Internet, stays on the Internet, is our motto. I never want her to forget this day.

This guy in Missouri has been talking with her for a while now. His name is Brett, and he works at Starbucks for now. There are two thumbs up already. His name starts with a B, like all our family members, and he works at our favorite coffee shop. Brett bought Bailey a reusable cup from Starbucks. This one cup is how the box of love began.

He started dropping stuff in the cup when he came home from work. The items were random things he had laying around his room that he thought Bailey would like. Guitar picks and a cool guitar capo. The capo was so unusual; it took us a minute to figure out what it was. He wanted to tell her, ‘You Rock,’ so he taped a rock to a piece of paper and put it in the cup. There was more he wanted to send, so the cup went into a box, and he started adding to the box.

FullSizeRenderHe wrote messages on index cards. The cards were in a stack, as she went through and read each one, her smile growing larger all the while. I noticed how she pulled each item out and looked at it like a mysterious treasure. Knowing that his hand touched it, his thought was behind it, and the t-shirts smelled like his cologne. It was a box of love and light.

The joy that each item brought her was priceless, even though the only money he spent was on the postage. The box took some time, effort and thought, which is important to any relationship. Brett showed us you can put love in a box, and send it, but the secret is not to keep it in the box. Unpack it, feel it, give it back to the giver and everyone around you.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 16 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Letitgocoach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is writing her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

This Ain’t Easy

If you had $20 to your name, how would you spend it? Years ago, I would spend that money on diapers. Today, I would spend $13 on my favorite candle, and the rest would be a toss up between a Pumpkin Spice Latte, or actual food.

Does that sound silly? I try to be a good steward of everything God gives me, including money. I think He knows, there are a lot of small things I would rather buy before food. It’s just not that important to me. A home that smells like fall from an amazing candle? The moment of savoring my favorite fall coffee drink? Those are important to me.

faithIt’s not easy living in the calling God gives you. God put a desire in me to write and that is what I do. Is it perfect grammar? I’m from Texas, it ain’t gonna be perfect.

I know one of my God given gifts is an Encourager. God prompted me once my legal separation began to start writing publicly. I have always kept a journal, but He wanted to show people my life. Walking through alcoholism and a divorce wasn’t easy, but it was possible. That is all my daughter and I need. Possible.

It is all thanks to God. He gets all the glory for it and that is what I’m here to share.

I’ve had the life of get up, take kids to school, go to work, pick kids up, eat dinner, go to bed and start all over. When it was time for my son to attend high school, the thought horrified me. He was such a good kid, I was afraid he would be eaten alive, so I homeschooled him. Then my daughters school closed down after her 3rd grade year, and I chose to homeschool her. That was the beginning of quality of life for us.sky

When she was younger, I would take her to work with me. As she got older, employers started to frown upon that, so God opened a door for me to work from home. When she turned 13, the beginning of her teenage years, I worked virtually for a friend of mine in California and still do, part time. It was less hours and less money, but the rewards!

That was when I found it to be true that we can make better choices and have a better life. My daughter took this picture of the sky behind our house. She goes outside almost everyday between 6 and 7 pm. The time she goes out depends on the colors reflecting in the house from outside. It’s the beauty factor that gets her attention.

This morning, I was going through a file I have for her in my email. In it was an email she sent a year ago, wishing me a Happy Birthday. The words that jumped off the page this morning were, “I want to be like you when I grow up.” This humbled me as gratitude just spilled out for this beautiful life God has given us. Once again, this must be God.
 

I’m Drowning But Don’t Save Me

It has been raining this week for what seems like forever. I’m sure it was only two days, but here’s what my pond and pier look like. cockWhere are the steps? Lol

Looking out my window, this is what I see. Earlier today I was comparing this to God’s goodness. How He just loves to overflow in our lives. Later in the day what began as overflow, turned into drowning. Was it all God?

I don’t believe God wants to ‘drown’ us in goodness. We wouldn’t be worth much to Him in that capacity. He wants us to be usable so, gasping for air is not a pretty sight. Absorbing the occurrences throughout the day, I had to discern what was good and what was not so good. Was the not so good fixable? Yes. Sometimes we have to face the challenges and responsibilities of life to get to the goodness.

If I do my part and do the very best I can, God meets me there. If life hits too hard and fast, I’m learning to wait. God has taken so many problems out of my life just by waiting on Him and His timing. By continuing to give it to God, to lay it at His feet, He will take either take it, because it was a test of my faith, or use it to grow me up.

The picture of the flooded pond is a great example of my faith. Even though I cannot see the steps leading to the pier, I know they’re there. They are right below the surface, and by waiting for the water to recede, they will be revealed.

 

 

Change is Your Friend

myselfThis week has been a week of growth. What is that other word for growth? Oh yea…Change. Gearing up to host a Letting Go Workshop makes me reminiscent of the first time I went through one. Going through my lessons from a year ago, it’s encouraging and comforting to see continuous growth.

lifeMy life has changed into a life of beauty and wonder. The lessons in the Letting Go Project equipped me with tools to continue to use when needed. One of the many gifts it gave me was feeling the change start to happen from within. It’s an unsettling feeling at first, but if you sit with it long enough, revelation will appear. I’m grateful that I can feel change stirring from within and let it flow out as a beacon of light upon the path God has in store.

heart

It’s always better when change happens from within to move outward into your life, versus life hitting you from outside and being forced to make changes within. That’s not a good feeling. It causes stress and uncertainty. Once I was at peace with myself, and began to like the person I was becoming, my life began changing accordingly. I didn’t need others to feel good about myself, or depend on them for goodness in my life. Change from within. It’s been a phenomenal week!