Tag: #Google

One More Day

I am going to post two Blogs today. It doesn’t happen often, but I have another one in me. If you are reading this, you may want to read the one from this morning, “Which Way Home.” A change of events occurred after posting that one, and I got my one more day.

Note to self. Do not let the dog outside as you’re loading up your truck.

Mr. Smith has a Min Pin, (miniature Doberman Pincher), that decided to race out the door as soon as I opened it. I didn’t think too much about it because he usually comes back in a few minutes. Once I finished loading my truck, I noticed the time was moving closer to my Radiation appointment, and he hadn’t returned. I was going to have to go look for him.

My left breast has a deep burn going on after 21 treatments. I started putting pure Aloe Vera on it yesterday, and thought, it would be nice to have one more day to keep it covered in Aloe. Thanks to Mr. Smith’s dog, I got my one more day. He came home an hour later.

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There was one thing I wanted to do while Smith was at work. To clean up my room.

Smith gave me this room to enjoy as I write, and tinker with stained glass. It got covered up with boxes from Christmas, and the table was full. I love this room and the view! By taking one more day to soothe my soul, I would also have it to heal my burned boob. I took a shower, put on Aloe , my Yoga pants, a comfortable t-shirt, and walked into the room.

I tore down all the empty boxes, and have them ready to be picked up. Then it was time to organize all this glass. Smith’s grandmother used to work with glass, and I am blessed to have all her leftover pieces. The tool caddy needed to be put together completely, so I did that as well. While looking at what I had in the caddy, I realized two things I would need.

While doing a Google search for the items, I felt my heart prompting me to look through the box of glass. Pulling out all of the pieces, and getting down to the bottom of the box. There is where I found the items I needed. The tool caddy is complete, and the room is cleaned, and organized. Sometimes the body and soul just need that one more day.

Learning With Chemo

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“A writer needs to write”, they say.

This is true. I think of something to write about almost everyday, but it rarely ends up here. As a writer, I get focused on sounding eloquent,  or making sure there is true meaning to my words. They also say, “Write. Even if it doesn’t make any sense.” My life doesn’t make a lot of sense.

I have a sister who is ten years older than me. Ten years ago, she went through the same kind of Breast Cancer I have. It even occurred the same time of year. The doctors know more now, so my journey is easier than hers.

She started sharing a list of things not to do during Chemo. I just laughed and said, “Oh, I’ve already done all of that. Thanks though!”

*The sun is not your friend.

I used to love to soak up the sunshine, and just feel it penetrate my skin. I did that after one of my Chemo Treatments, and paid the price for two days. I felt really sick from the sun.

*Google is not your friend.

Do not Google your symptoms, or any side effects. I love Google, and use it all the time, but not for Chemo. They list every side effect imaginable, and there are some horror stories out there. I was terrified of the thought of Chemo, and then I read a comment, “Cancer doesn’t kill. Chemo does.” I was done with Google, and would call my doctor if needed.

I believe God has given me a relatively easy path through this, so I can share with others.

There will be things you need to modify. It’s all about your body, and what it’s going through. It’s time to listen to, and be kind to your body. Pretty much every little thing you did before Chemo, you will be grateful for afterwards. I have a lot of gratitude for what it has shown me, and you can read more about that here.

You will get through this, and be better for it.

It’s ‘body over mind’ time Beautiful Souls.

*No heavy lifting or strenuous work.

I drug my 50 lb. fully loaded trashcan down to the street just like before. Once was enough. I thought my heart would explode.

When your body says, “Stop”, just stop and stretch out across your bed. It needs to rest.

The main thing is to pour more goodness into the body, than poison. Chemo stays in your system for 48 hours, and then leaves, so be careful the day of, and two days after. Eat small meals of goodness. Fruit, veggies, good cheeses, with crackers. Do you buy those Goldfish crackers for your kids?

Eat them all. Parmesan Goldfish will be your best friend, and taste delightful right after Chemo.

I drink a ton of liquid nutrition. It has been my very best friend, and you can find that here.

If you, or someone you know is going down this Chemo path, please feel free to share. The path may not look beautiful at first, but this is one journey I won’t soon forget.

 

 

Barbie to Her

I have put off writing this because I’m still moving from the drive. I enjoy being in control, but when I ponder the past few weeks, there is no evidence of that. I wanted this month to be a time of reflection, but God had other plans.

I knew as soon as I saw her number come up on my phone. It was laying on my desk, next to my laptop, and I just stared at it while it was ringing. When I answered she was sobbing, and then I knew God had heard our plea for help.

Mama did not wake up that morning my sister conveyed. This had been a long ride for all, but especially my sister.

I loved my Mama. She was a kick butt, independent, strong minded woman that would hug the breath right outta ya.

Until she was diagnosed with Dementia. She labeled this piece for me to have because she knew she might not recall.

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I didn’t know what to do. All I knew was I had to get to my sister and make sure she was okay. The airline wants you to pay them in gold bricks the month of December, so driving it was. From me to her was 20 hours of driving time, and I had not driven that far before.

My sister’s ex husband heard the news, and posted his condolences on my Facebook page. He referred to me as Barbie, so my friends probably wondered, ‘Who is Barbie?”

That was my nickname growing up.

My full name is Barbara, so I guess my family thought it was cute to shorten it to Barbie. They are the only ones that call me Barbie. People have tried after finding out about it, but it doesn’t sound right. It’s one of those things you respond to from a family member because it fits. I am not her today.

My family still sees me as little Barbie which is humorous to me. They have no interest in changing their vision; they don’t know I write, and have not read this Blog. The last thing they heard was I got a divorce which was almost 3 years ago. They don’t know Barbara.

I miss my Mama, but I have missed her for years.

She is in heaven completely healed, and I’ll always be Barbie to her.

 

Learning To Fly

This morning, I am trying to find the right desk chair. It’s important to have a good chair when you type as much as me. The one I was using up until today, was making my back hurt because it had no back support. We need support.

It’s been a quiet morning, which is different from yesterday as well. Gus is behaving and the front porch arena is calm. I love my porch and the swing hanging from it. Up until a few minutes ago, I wasn’t sure how much I loved it.

happy friday quoteI found this picture while googling ‘Happy Friday’ quotes. It doesn’t say one word about Friday, but I thought it was pretty. The hardwood floor is what drew me in because I love my hardwood floor. It’s important to “Be still”, calm your mind, so you can see what is going on around you. Listen.

This picture eluded me to believe it was about Friday, just like these birds think my front porch is a barn. They are Barn Swallows and they were cute for about a week. This old farmhouse has a beautiful wood beam with a ledge framing the porch. It is similar to a barn structure, so they think.

They built nests in three corners of the porch. Why they built three, I am not sure, unless they have plans to expand. I love birds, but one nest on the porch is more than enough. They had babies in one and they have grown to the point of flying on their own. I love how the mothers scoots them out of the nest. She lines it with feathers when they are first born, and as they grow she removes the soft lining. The nest gets so uncomfortable, they are more apt to leave.

Isn’t that how it works? We are happy as long as we’re comfortable, but as soon as we start to feel discomfort, we freak out. The mother bird watches her babies learn to use their wings and swoops down to catch them if they are going to hit the ground. She throws them back up in the air to try again and again. Watching out for their safety.

This is one way God works in my life. He scoots me out of my comfort zone, so I will fly and trust Him to catch me.

I have a barn behind the house. Yesterday, when I sat in the swing to spend time with God, they started dive bombing my head. I guess they were still learning to fly and kinda clumsy. They seem to be doing better today, so they can stay for now. It’s if it  comes down to me sitting in the swing, enjoying some quiet, or them stealing my joy, they will be introduced to my barn. They are named Barn Swallows for a reason, and this is my home, not their barn.

 

blackandwhiteBarbara is a writer and loves being a Mom to her 15 year old daughter. It’s a dream come true for her to be a Let It Go Coach and help others enjoy their lives. She hosts Workshops, does one on one Coaching and is working on her first book.  You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com