For My Daughter

I woke  up very early this morning with a mind full of my daughter. She is sleeping in her room across the hall, but since this Blog began with her in mind, here’s one for you Bailey.

You have watched me your whole life and know my every mood. When you were around 12 years old, you saw me standing in the backyard, staring into the abyss. Walking up and sliding your hand into mine you asked, “Are you ever going to smile again.?” I wasn’t sure at the time if that was possible, but I knew something drastic was going to take place.

We had a farm called Hope Tree. You named it, drew the logo and we met with a graphic artist to bring it to life. We opened it up to the public and brought in families that have never held a chicken, or seen a baby pig. We educated them about farm life, the kids got dirty, and we went on to host birthday parties. Three years later, people still call wanting to visit.

We had ducks, and you took a Vet Science course, so we incubated their eggs. I still recall how mesmerized we were watching through the little window of the incubator as they broke free from their shell. Then we had a huge cardboard box full of baby ducks. That was the noisiest box ever, but a friend of mine saved us and took almost all of them to her farm.

That farm was the last good part of our life while married to your Dad. It got me through so much, and kept me sane as my marriage crumbled. I don’t know which broke my heart more. Finally walking out of the marriage, or saying goodbye to every animal, and leaving Hope Tree. The very best part of it all was taking you with me. God has led us through it all.

We knew it was past time to leave, but didn’t know where to go. Being homeschooled, we were not tied to any school district, so we could live anywhere. You found an ad for a house on 40 acres in McDade Texas. I looked at you in dazed confusion and asked, “Where the heck is McDade?” It was an hour away, and I’ll never forget the look on our faces as the road to the little house got smaller, more treacherous, and finally ran out of pavement onto a gravel driveway.

Mr. Rick was waiting to show us the little house. It was so beautiful out there, and I recall how everything was so green. Rick and his wife Patricia lived on the 40 acres as well, so it wasn’t like we would be alone. I had asked God to make it crystal clear if this was our new home. We had looked at quite a few, but nothing felt quite right. Mr. Rick was standing in the dining area, by the bay window, and looked at me and asked, “Is this your new home?”

My heart swells when I think of that little house. It was our new beginning.Walking this path of life together, with God at the lead, has been an amazing journey. Rick and Patricia were so sad when we left, but a year and a half later, we were ready to fly the nest, onto a little bit bigger one. It was like God has chosen them to watch over us, just like where we are now.

You found this house too, and again, a lovely couple own it. We downsized and moved to 5 acres, but Mr. Pete has his woodworking shop on the acreage, so we’re never alone. God always puts the right people in your path as just the right time. The house in McDade was a safe place for us to grow and learn how to depend on God for every little thing, but there were three things we yearned for. Things we took for granted before. Do you recall what they were?

The house was a one bedroom, but it was a massive room. We shared it which I wouldn’t have had it any other way. At the time, I don’t think we were willing to be separated by rooms. We were ready for our own bedroom, a bathtub to soak in, and a washer and dryer.

You learned the ins and outs of the laundromat for a year and a half. We were grateful, but tired of going every week. We had a shower, but no tub, and you couldn’t very well go hide in your room from me, because we shared it. This house on 5 acres has all that and more.

This is probably the longest Blog I have written in a long time, and I could go on and on, but I don’t need to. You remember it all, because you experienced it all with me. I am so grateful for you and how brave you have been your whole life, but especially these last 3 years. You are moving toward adulthood quickly, and I couldn’t be more pleased of who you’ve become.

Don’t ever forget your worth. You wrote about it here right after we moved into this house. You are beautiful inside and out, but way too hard on yourself. You get that honestly, but I hope you see me being kinder to myself and will follow suit. You have told me that “I’m your hero”, since you were 5, but what you may not know is, you are mine too. I love you.

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Know Your Worth by Bailey

This was written by my 15 year old daughter yesterday. She didn’t realize I was working on a Blog about worth to publish today. Our titles are even very similar and so are our souls. Love this girl and here are her views on worth.

Know Your Worth

In the world we live in today we are constantly being told that we are not “worthy” or we are not good enough.

It may be because you’re not popular at school or work.
Maybe it’s because you dress differently than the people you’re around.
Or maybe it’s because you are sheltered from things most people know or use.

Whatever the reason may be…. It’s not the truth.
No matter who you are, no matter where you come from, no matter what… There is no one in this world that can tell you what you are worth.

Only God knows your true worth and you are worth even more than you could imagine.

Proverbs 3:15 says,
She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her.”

You are worth more than rubies in God’s eyes.
The Maker of the universe created you beautifully, uniquely, and wonderfully.

Think about this…
There are roughly 7,322,077,700 people on this world (and counting) and even with of all these people no two human beings have the same finger prints.

Beautifully, uniquely, and wonderfully made.

We are not enough on our own. No person is “greater” than another.
But when we accept Jesus into our hearts… He makes us enough. He is more than enough and He will supply all of our needs if we just ask.

We are brothers and sisters in Christ all made in God’s image. And when Christ was hanging on that cross and He died for all of our sins …He knew your worth and my worth. He saved us instead of saving Himself. You’re worth it.

Own Your Worth

To be a good woman of Godly character in today’s world is work. Other people will try to show you, but that is by their vision, not God’s. Ladies, know your worth. Don’t allow others to define you. Know who you are and own it.

oneinamillionI have tried to please various people on various levels. People pleasing is one sure fire way to wear yourself out. Knowing I’m not responsible for anyone’s happiness, except my own, life becomes a whole lot simpler.

By being happy and well grounded, others can bask in the overflow. Knowing who I am, and what I desire is a balancing act. My desires change, but not my knowing who I am. Princess status in God’s eyes.

Before stepping into a relationship, be sure to have one with yourself first. Love the woman looking back at you in the mirror. It took a lot of letting go to reveal the woman God wanted me to see. She was there, but life had taken a toll. I had retreated to a box in the corner, but God sent a friend.

It’s my passion to help people, but kinda difficult from inside a box. Knowing my worth and showing it were two different things. Instead of pulling me out of the box, Mr. Smith climbed in with me. He laid down beside me and kicked it open. That’s what friend are for, and when I was the student, the teacher appeared. God always delivers.