Feel the Music

Feel the Music

In four more days, she will be 18. My darling daughter.

I’ve always thought of her as older, and wise beyond her years. It was 5 years ago that we ventured out on our own. What a brave little girl, to leave everything she knew, for the unknown. I hope she always leaves her comfort zone.

Do we give up a chunk of our lives for our children?

My daughter and I have shared our lives. She has watched her Mama grow up, just as I have watched her. She has big wings, but they are still developing. I believe this year has been the year of finding myself, so I am ready when she flies. I don’t worry about her, so she shouldn’t worry about me. When she sees me stepping off the path she says,

Is this what you gave up a 25 year marriage for?

We take care of one another, and this song makes us cry. My darling daughter, you are my life, but you have also given me yours. May we fly in sequence, but always find our way home.

 

Feel the Music, Letting Go

Feel the Music

Heard this song come on the radio this morning. It made me smile because I have learned this lesson.  The Don’t Wants.

Letting Go, Present Moment, Quality of life

Shades of Pink

Once my daughter painted her room, it prompted a change in mine. My bedroom is already a color, and it’s a pleasant neutral, so this is not a need. It’s been a slow burning want.

My favorite color has always been Red, but I surprised myself.

Walking into my room with two paint samples. One was a good, solid red, and the other was a pale version of red. After trying each on the wall, I chose the softer one. It feels good.

shadesofpink
Courtesy of Shades of Pink

This morning, this photo came up on my Facebook news feed.

It was posted by one of my favorite pages called Shades of Pink. I have settled into no social media apps on my phone. Checking it via laptop a couple of times a day is sufficient.

Melody Beattie’s words that resonated today are:

“Stay open to every opportunity.” (Doing that)

“If you’re tired, rest. If you’re sad, cry.” (Did that)

“Let destiny have it’s way with you.” (Thought-provoking)

Right before falling asleep lastnight, I read this. “Maybe that relationship that made you doubt yourself so much came along to help you learn to listen to and trust your inner voice.

I’m not bold Red. Presently, I am various Shades of Pink.

A Better Life, Quality of life

The Seeds of Success by Og Mandino

letting-seed-growGod, I thank you for this day.

I know I have not accomplished as yet all you expect of me, and if that is your reason for bathing me in the fresh dew of another dawn, I am most grateful.

I am prepared at last, to make you proud of me.

I will forget yesterday, with all it’s trial and tribulations, aggravations and setbacks. The past is already a dream from which I can neither retrieve a single word nor erase any foolish deeds.

I will resolve, however, that if I have injured anyone yesterday through my thoughtlessness, I will not let this day’s sun set before I make amends, and nothing I do today will be of greater importance.

I will not fret the future. My success and happiness does not depend on straining to see what lurks dimly on the horizon, but to do, this day, what lies clearly at hand.

I will treasure this day, for it is all I have. I know that’s it’s rushing hours cannot be accumulated or stored, like precious grain, for future use.

I will live as all good actors do when they are on stage-only in the moment. I cannot perform at my best today by regretting my previous act’s mistakes or worrying about the scene to come.

I will embrace today’s difficult tasks, take off my coat, and make dust in the world. I will remember that the more productive I am, the less harm I am apt to suffer, the tastier will be my food, the sweeter my sleep, and the better satisfied I will be with my place in the world.

I will free myself today from slavery to the clock and calendar. Although I will plan this day in order to conserve my steps and energy, I will begin to measure my life in deeds, not years, in thoughts, not seasons.

I will remain aware of how little it takes to make this a happy day. Never will I pursue happiness, because it is not a goal, just a by-product, and there is no happiness in having or in getting, only in giving.

I will run from no danger I might encounter today, because I am certain that nothing will happen to me that I am not equipped to handle with your help. Just as any gem is polished by friction, I am certain to become more valuable through this day’s adversities, and if you close one door, you always open another for me.

I will live this day as if it were Christmas. I will be a giver of gifts and deliver to my enemies the gift of forgiveness, my opponents, tolerance, my friends, a smile, my children, a good example, and every gift will be wrapped with unconditional love.

I will waste not even a precious second today in anger or hate or jealousy or selfishness. I know that the seeds I sow will harvest, because every action, good or bad, is always followed by and equal reaction. I will plant only good seeds today.

I will treat today as a priceless violin. One may draw harmony from it an another, discord, yet no one will blame the instrument. Life is the same, and if I play it correctly, it will give forth beauty, but if I play it ignorantly, it will produce ugliness.

I will condition myself to look on every problem I encounter today as no more than a pebble in my shoe. I remember the pain, so harsh I could hardly walk, and recall my surprise when I removed my shoe and found only a grain of sand.

I will work convinced that nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm. To do anything today that is truly worth doing, I must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in with gusto and scramble through as well as I can.

I will face the world with goals set for this day, but they will be attainable ones, not the vague, impossible variety declared by those who make a career of failure. I realize that you always try me a little first, to see what I would do with a lot.

I will never hide my talents. If I am silent, I am forgotten, if I do not advance, I will fall back. If I walk away from any challenge today, my self-esteem will be forever scarred, and if I cease to grow, even a little, I will become smaller. I reject the stationary position because it is always the beginning of the end.

I will keep a smile on my face and in my heart even when it hurts today. I know that the world is a looking-glass and gives back to me the reflection of my own soul. Now I understand the secret of correcting the attitude of others and that is to correct my own.

I will turn away from any temptation today that might cause me to break my word or lose my self-respect. I am positive that the only thing I possess more valuable than my life is my honor.

I will work this day with all my strength, content in the knowledge that life does not consist of wallowing in the past or peering anxiously at the future. It is appalling to contemplate the great number of painful steps by which one arrives at a truth so old, so obvious, and so frequently expressed. Whatever it offers, little or much, my life is now.

I will pause whenever I am feeling sorry for myself today, and remember that this is the only day I have and must play it to the fullest. What my part may signify in the great whole. I may not recognize, but I am here to play it and now is the time.

I will remember that those who have fewest regrets are those who take each moment as it comes for all that it’s worth.

This is my day!

These are my seeds.

Thank you, God, for this precious garden of time.

Present Moment, Quality of life

Live and Learn

Today will be spent painting the wood trim in my daughter’s bedroom. Since she recently painted the walls a light color, the trim looks like a gross white, instead of bright white.

To some, this may not sound like fun, but I love it.

I’m no painter, but there is something about holding a good trim brush, and paint. You become one with the tools in hand. Make it a meditative stance, instead of a chore. When my daughter comes home, her room will have a lighter, brighter feel, and I will have a feeling of accomplishment.

sunday.png

You can do anything you want to do, if you want to enough.

My daughter and I consider our bedrooms our havens.

I really appreciated this mindset during Chemo for Breast Cancer. Once the Chemo Treatment was complete. my daughter would drive us home, and I would fall onto my bed. I would lay there for a couple of days, allowing my body time to do what was needed. It made me grateful I had bought a new bed the previous year. It felt good to my body, and soul.

Be inspired today Lovelies. Do something for your soul.

Talking with a friend yesterday, she asked if I had any vacation plans for the summer. That is something I rarely think about. My life feels like a vacation everyday, so I told her, “I’ve created a life I don’t need a vacation from.” She gasped and said, “I want to do that!” I assured her she could.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

 

A Better Life, Letting Go, Moving On

Dream While Awake

I haven’t written a Blog in three weeks. This was not intentional. It was like giving myself permission ‘not to’ if it wasn’t inspired. Not long ago, I felt this need to Blog almost every day, but letting go of that ‘need’ is freeing.

My last post entitled, Time and Talents, caused me to ponder what I really wanted my life to be. God has given my daughter and me a beautiful life, but there is always more in store with God. Looking at everything I’ve laid my hand to, and asking myself, “Is this God’s very best? Do I see any fruit from my labor? Do I want to continue everything I’ve been doing the past 3 years?” Comfortable feels good doesn’t it?

The last few weeks I have been preparing my nest, and myself for more. Making room by de-cluttering my mind, home, and even washing my truck. Taking care of everything God has given me, and looking to see if it still fits in my life. My mission is still to reveal the beauty of everyday life, but how beautiful is my life? Can it be even more beautiful?

Loosen the grip on the seen, and make room for the unseen.

heisable

A couple of weeks ago, I was lying in bed getting ready to go to sleep. Before I drifted off, a slide show began rolling through my mind. It was a recap of the past 5 years, and I could see how far God had brought me. The slide show brought me up to the present moment, and I could see my current surroundings, but it slowly rolled for a glimpse more.

I was still lying in my bed, but the bedroom looked different. It was lighter, and brighter. My current light fixture attached to the ceiling was replaced by a dainty, crystal chandelier.

Imagine your most beautiful life. What does it look like?

God has even better in store. It’s far more than we can see.

We have dreams in our hearts, and God knows our heart.

beach

This is my dream. To sit on the beach at any given moment. What that looks like specifically, I am not sure, but this picture has been sitting on my laptop for quite some time.

Will I live at the beach, or have a vacation home there?

To watch the sunset over the sea, and drift off to sleep with a window open listening to the waves. To walk along the beach at sunrise, breathing in the salty air. There will be a loft in the house with a magnificent view for writing, painting, building stained glass, and whatever else lies deep in my heart. A lot is unknown, and unseen, but this is my dream.

God’s timing is impeccable, but also unpredictable. To believe in my heart for God’s very best as I did 5 years ago. You may be thinking, “Sounds good Barb, but how are you going to get from point A to point B?” My love for people, networking, helping others achieve their dreams, and my adoration for ‘pretty’, has led me to new career opportunity.

A new passion? No…God has renewed the passion I had 20 years ago. It will take stepping out into the unknown again, and trusting Him in a big way. Thank you to all the souls who have taught me to wait, and wait well. To be unsettled where I am, and be able to utilize what God has taught me up to this point, because there’s more. Is there WiFi on the beach?

Letting Go, Quality of life

The Sweet Spot

I am sitting firmly in my sweet spot. Where I feel a flood of light and love in my life. It’s mornings like this I used to look out my window and gaze at Stork as I wrote this Blog. My new house doesn’t have a pond, so there is no Stork.

thankfulI miss Stork, but I love our new home. Sometimes we haveta pull away from what we once loved to love again even more. Letting go of one home to move into another was bittersweet, but the rewards have been endless. Everyday I notice little things that this house has that I’ve always wanted. Just little things that are there waiting for me to use. I wanted to hang my two flower baskets up on the porch, but only saw one hanger. Looking more closely, there was a second hook already in place, patiently waiting.

My daughter and I are going to have a busy weekend! Preparing the email to send her father, letting him know his time with her will be different days, used to stress me out. I’m looking at it today as doing the next right thing. Making him aware of a change in schedule is a courtesy. Just because I couldn’t love him as a wife, doesn’t mean he’s not a good father.

whoyouallowWalking away from a 25 year marriage was the hardest decision I ever had to make. In a few weeks, it will have been two years since the U haul went from one home to the next. The hardest decisions are always the best.

That was the last hard decision I had to make. There have been important decisions everyday, but nothing quite so life altering. People and situations simply flow in and out of my life. Everything happens for a reason, for the greater good and God’s glory. Allow what you wish to keep.

I have learned and loved these past two years. None of it has been painful enough to scar me, but it has changed me. Being grateful or thankful is the key to my happiness. I love my life today, and my life loves me. Let it flow.

 

 

A Better Life, Quality of life

The Seeds of Success by Og Mandino

God, I thank you for this day.

I know I have not accomplished as yet all you expect of me, and if that is your reason for bathing me in the fresh dew of another dawn, I am most grateful.

I am prepared at last, to make you proud of me.

I will forget yesterday, with all it’s trial and tribulations, aggravations and setbacks. The past is already a dream from which I can neither retrieve a single word nor erase any foolish deeds.

I will resolve, however, that if I have injured anyone yesterday through my thoughtlessness, I will not let this day’s sun set before I make amends, and nothing I do today will be of greater importance.

I will not fret the future. My success and happiness does not depend on straining to see what lurks dimly on the horizon, but to do, this day, what lies clearly at hand.

I will treasure this day, for it is all I have. I know that’s it’s rushing hours cannot be accumulated or stored, like precious grain, for future use.

I will live as all good actors do when they are on stage-only in the moment. I cannot perform at my best today by regretting my previous act’s mistakes or worrying about the scene to come.

I will embrace today’s difficult tasks, take off my coat, and make dust in the world. I will remember that the more productive I am, the less harm I am apt to suffer, the tastier will be my food, the sweeter my sleep, and the better satisfied I will be with my place in the world.

I will free myself today from slavery to the clock and calendar. Although I will plan this day in order to conserve my steps and energy, I will begin to measure my life in deeds, not years, in thoughts, not seasons.

I will remain aware of how little it takes to make this a happy day. Never will I pursue happiness, because it is not a goal, just a by-product, and there is no happiness in having or in getting, only in giving.

I will run from no danger I might encounter today, because I am certain that nothing will happen to me that I am not equipped to handle with your help. Just as any gem is polished by friction, I am certain to become more valuable through this day’s adversities, and if you close one door, you always open another for me.

I will live this day as if it were Christmas. I will be a giver of gifts and deliver to my enemies the gift of forgiveness, my opponents, tolerance, my friends, a smile, my children, a good example, and every gift will be wrapped with unconditional love.

I will waste not even a precious second today in anger or hate or jealousy or selfishness. I know that the seeds I sow will harvest, because every action, good or bad, is always followed by and equal reaction. I will plant only good seeds today.

I will treat today as a priceless violin. One may draw harmony from it an another, discord, yet no one will blame the instrument. Life is the same, and if I play it correctly, it will give forth beauty, but if I play it ignorantly, it will produce ugliness.

I will condition myself to look on every problem I encounter today as no more than a pebble in my shoe. I remember the pain, so harsh I could hardly walk, and recall my surprise when I removed my shoe and found only a grain of sand.

I will work convinced that nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm. To do anything today that is truly worth doing, I must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in with gusto and scramble through as well as I can.

I will face the world with goals set for this day, but they will be attainable ones, not the vague, impossible variety declared by those who make a career of failure. I realize that you always try me a little first, to see what I would do with a lot.

I will never hide my talents. If I am silent, I am forgotten, if I do not advance, I will fall back. If I walk away from any challenge today, my self-esteem will be forever scarred, and if I cease to grow, even a little, I will become smaller. I reject the stationary position because it is always the beginning of the end.

I will keep a smile on my face and in my heart even when it hurts today. I know that the world is a looking glass and gives back to me the reflection of my own soul. Now I understand the secret of correcting the attitude of others and that is to correct my own.

I will turn away from any temptation today that might cause me to break my word or lose my self-respect. I am positive that the only thing I possess more valuable than my life is my honor.

I will work this day with all my strength, content in the knowledge that life does not consist of wallowing in the past or peering anxiously at the future. It is appalling to contemplate the great number of painful steps by which one arrives at a truth so old, so obvious, and so frequently expressed. Whatever it offers, little or much, my life is now.

I will pause whenever I am feeling sorry for myself today, and remember that this is the only day I have and must play it to the fullest. What my part may signify in the great whole. I may not recognize, but I am here to play it and now is the time.

I will remember that those who have fewest regrets are those who take each moment as it comes for all that it’s worth.

This is my day!

These are my seeds.

Thank you, God, for this precious garden of time.