Tag: #listening

Feel the Music

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My daughter: “You haven’t done a Feel the Music in a while.”

Me: I don’t drive that much anymore.” I hear most of these songs for Feel the Music while driving, but I wasn’t prepared for this song to start playing as soon as I started my truck. It just started playing like it was queued up and ready, but I wasn’t.

The hard to listen to songs. The ones that bring back memories of a love gone sideways, or swept up by crashing waves and drug out to the middle of the ocean. You see, I’ve been listening to the hard songs all year, but at some point you have to dance to it.

Photo by Seth Doyle on Unsplash

This song is sang by Cody Johnson. Mr. Smith told me about Cody and I have his CD in my truck. I enjoy his music, but the first song on the CD is the one I share with you today. It’s the hard to listen to song I usually skip over, but today I was able to listen.

Just try to quit smokin’ and reel back the drinkin’
Don’t always tell her everything you’re thinkin’
And dance her when she needs dancin’

It’s bittersweet because there are parts of the song that Smith nailed, but there are also parts he didn’t. He couldn’t quit smoking, even though it was important to me. I wanted him to be around another 50 years. Smith shared at the beginning of our relationship that he knew how to dance, and was good at it.

I’ve always wanted to be good at dancing, and have a partner who would show me. He didn’t dance me when I needed dancing.

Photo by Akemy Mory on Unsplash

The part of the song he was always good at was listening. Smith never tried to fix me, but would offer suggestions on how we could fix my world when it cracked. When I would get upset I’d go sit in the middle of the bed. He’d give me some time, but eventually come in and lay on the bed as an open invitation to talk.

I wasn’t good at sharing what was wrong because I was always concerned he would laugh, or it think it was silly. That wasn’t the point though, he just wanted me to spill it.

Crawl up in that bed right next to her and listen
Instead of having all the answers

It’s a simple country song, and the name of it is, “Ain’t Nothin’ to It”, but obviously there is something to it. To the couples who have made it through the years it takes to solidify a relationship, go grab your partner and dance them like they need dancing.

My guess would be that’s all they really need.

Let them Unload

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Listening is an act of kindness.

Acts of kindness are sometimes intentional. I really have to stop and think, “What can I do today to extend kindness?” Who knew it takes thought!? 😂

I was running errands yesterday, and felt led to stop by the pizza place. I knew Boss man would be there alone preparing for another day of business, but I also knew, he’s had a rough week.

I walked in and found him sitting at a table, so I sat down beside him, touched his arm and asked, “How’s your heartbeat? Unload your week?”

That’s all it took for the floodgates to open.

heart

I just sat and listened.

I didn’t offer my opinion or any advice. I gently touched his arm when he shared something painful, just to reassure him of my presence.

Twenty minutes later, he was unburdened. He began laughing and joking with me as he walked into the kitchen to start lunch. He was a little more free to enjoy his day.

As I was leaving he thanked me for stopping by, but I didn’t really feel like I did anything. All I did was listen, but that’s all he needed. Let them unload.

Feel the Music

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I made a note of this song weeks ago.

This came to my attention just now.

So my dahlings, someone out there needs to hear this, and better yet, believe this. We tend to believe what other people say about us too quickly. What does God say about us? Which is more important?

Over all the other voices, sometimes including my own, I choose to believe You God, and what You say.

Get Really Dirty

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I don’t know if my fingernails will ever be the same after today. They are compacted with dirt.

In this phase of life I embrace it.

Living near small towns, I have experts in every field nearby. The hardware store has a garden area where I go in search of Megan. She educates me.

My front yard has lots of rocks. They are on top of the earth and deep underneath. To plant flowers I need to make dirt since digging holes are fruitless.

Megan showed me two bags of what I need to make really good dirt for happy flowers. I would need to mix the two bags half and half in a large bucket.

“Fill the bucket halfway with one and then the other. Dig your hands in all the way up to your elbows and mix it by hand.”

The look on my face was priceless I’m sure, but Megan never leads me astray. What she says works.

I took her guidance to heart and dug in.

flowers

Looks like a trail of happiness to me.

But first, I had to dig in and get really dirty.

It’s All Good

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I write about beauty and this life God has given me.

Sometimes I can be my own worst enemy. Overthinking any given phrase can cause me to pick apart a conversation. The handful of people I surround myself with would be better off if I would choose the correct role and stay there. My daughter wants a Mom and not a Coach. She will tell me often, “Stop coaching me.” It’s what I do, not who I am.

The one thing I Coach about more than anything else is ‘happiness.’ I enjoy numerous levels of happiness, but some people have none. My passion is to help people find the right level for themselves. What is the biggest culprit of zero happiness? Other people. Yes, people happen.

God places people in my path wherever I go that need encouragement, even at the grocery store. They just gravitate toward me and I enjoy it very much. Sometimes it’s just to listen to their problems, or to assist them in unloading their cart. You know you have a person in desperate need when all they want is a hug.

It’s important to have at least one person in your life who knows and loves your authentic self. I can lose myself in what I do, but I have a friend in North Carolina who knows me very well. She finds it humorous that I would not have one animal, and today, I am Sweeping Dog Hair.

She gently reminds me of who I am, how far I’ve come and how God wants to use me. We need at least one person who believes in us. Then it’s all good.

Let it Fall

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My life has come so far in a rather short amount of time. Being in the middle of it, makes it difficult to see. My daughter told me, “I don’t think you realize how far you’ve come.” I was having a pity party, but it didn’t last long.

good

Being a coach is not about giving advice. For me, it’s about listening to someone talk, until they find their own answers. We all know what to do. Being an adult should give you the knowledge of what’s right and wrong. Knowing and doing are two different things. Knowing comes easy but doing is when it gets tough.

Listening to someone talk, and then repeating things they say to you is all it takes. We have the answers, they just get buried underneath the circumstances. Saying them out loud, instead of letting them roll around inside us is healthy. Mama always said, “There’s more room out than there is in”, and that holds true.

When life is falling apart around you, let it fall.

We try so hard to hold everything together, but I have found that is only a temporary fix. Pull yourself together and do the next right thing. Start sorting through what is wrong in your life and get to what’s right. What is right for you will be good for others. Go through the debris to reveal the beauty.