Letting Go, Present Moment, Quality of life

Shades of Pink

Once my daughter painted her room, it prompted a change in mine. My bedroom is already a color, and it’s a pleasant neutral, so this is not a need. It’s been a slow burning want.

My favorite color has always been Red, but I surprised myself.

Walking into my room with two paint samples. One was a good, solid red, and the other was a pale version of red. After trying each on the wall, I chose the softer one. It feels good.

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Courtesy of Shades of Pink

This morning, this photo came up on my Facebook news feed.

It was posted by one of my favorite pages called Shades of Pink. I have settled into no social media apps on my phone. Checking it via laptop a couple of times a day is sufficient.

Melody Beattie’s words that resonated today are:

“Stay open to every opportunity.” (Doing that)

“If you’re tired, rest. If you’re sad, cry.” (Did that)

“Let destiny have it’s way with you.” (Thought-provoking)

Right before falling asleep lastnight, I read this. “Maybe that relationship that made you doubt yourself so much came along to help you learn to listen to and trust your inner voice.

I’m not bold Red. Presently, I am various Shades of Pink.

Letting Go, Moving On, Unbecoming 2016

I Planted Weeds

Earlier this week, I went to see my friend Stephanie.

She gave me the courage to try my hand at plants again.

I took one look at her wrought iron fencing, and fell in love.

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It’s a weed, but look at how delicate the greenery is. It has tiny red flowers that bloom in the shape of a trumpet. Walking into the shop, I found Stephanie and asked her about it. She said it comes up every year, but this was my first time seeing it. She saw the look in my eyes, and said, “Come on! Lemme get the water hose, and I’ll dig you some up!”

She gave me plenty to bring home and plant, and I planted it along the fence facing the bedroom windows. I am not sure how I went from nurturing and growing plants, to planting weeds, but I like it. To lay across my bed, and gaze out the window at it will be peaceful. It just needs to take root to grow. Her’s were growing under rocks, so they are tough.

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I’ve been reading Melody Beattie a lot lately. She is ahead of me on this journey of finding yourself, but we have similar hearts. Here are some of her words that resonated with me.

“Be still and know that I am God. Stillness is a place. Become familiar with stillness. Take time to learn it’s power.” Stillness is found when being still, and becoming present in that moment.

“Find a balance that is right for you.”

“Become sensitive to your needs.”

“Inhale, receive. Exhale, give back.”

“Clear resentments from your heart.”

“Learn to be calm.”

“All you have to do about your feelings is feel them.”

“Embrace each cycle of your life.” This is where she talks about aging. I agree with Melody, that when you hit 50, you begin the second half of your life. Let’s see what that looks like.

“The answers are in your heart. Go back~think~when was your heart it’s happiest? Go back to your heart. It will always lead you home.” Home is where the heart is. I’m going home.

Present Moment, Quality of life, Unbecoming 2016

Trust the Process

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It was early morning as I was sat in the front porch swing, pondering my sobriety. November 10th will mark 19 years sober. It’s scary getting close to the 20 year mark because you want to keep it. God spoke to my heart and said, “What are you doing to protect it?” I had lost track of that piece of me. It was time to go back and visit Alcoholics Anonymous.

Walking into a meeting the topic was ‘Unity.’ That felt good.

Sitting, listening to people share, and gathering up wisdom from the room. I was taking notes for later, and my pen started writing without a thought. Looking at the page it read, “I don’t need an intimate relationship, but I do need/want love.” The date was Sunday, July 2nd, which was right before I Bled Out, and then came, You are Good.

I’ve been reading Melody Beattie. My heart is tender now, and I want to keep it. To keep a tender heart you have to douse yourself with the tender-hearted. Like the ferns on the porch that get drenched everyday, I’m going to trust the process.

 

Present Moment, Quality of life

The Perfect Day

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I am yearning for more. I am grateful for where I am, and what I have, but my heart, and soul are telling me there is so much more in store. Ephesians 3:20 says, “Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.” I’m a thinker, and I ask a lot from God, but He says more than I could ask or think.

I’m reading a book by Melody Beattie, and want to share this simple meditation to help set your intention for the day. Yes, I do believe what you pray and meditate on, will eventually come to pass.

♥…♥…♥…♥…♥…♥…♥…♥…♥…♥…♥

“Create the perfect day each day. In the morning, before you get out of bed, or while you’re drinking your coffee or tea, spend a moment thinking about what the perfect day would be like for you. No, we’re not in control, but we can help create enthusiasm, excitement, and passion in our lives. Projecting positive thoughts, and images can be important part of our prayers.”

“Touch for a moment on some ideas that would be meaningful for you throughout the day. What would feel good? What would make your heart happy? Then, surrender control.”

“See what life has in store. Enter fully into each experience, and emotion that comes your way. At the end of the day-whether what you projected happened or not-take time to thank God for giving you the perfect day.”

Excerpt from, “Finding Your Way Home: A Soul Survival Kit,” by Melody Beattie

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Give It Time

Time reveals all. We have talked about time, patience and waiting patiently, but I am learning, time does reveal all. The big challenge for me is, don’t jump in and start doing. Just be present.

Something interesting happened because of the ‘Box of Love’, this week. This guy taking up space in my daughters heart and mind, sent a couple of his favorite t-shirts in the box. She wore one yesterday, and that evening, she came over to sit beside me in the swing. She said, “You know what sucks about wearing this shirt? It smells like him and makes me really miss him.”

gratefulMy heart hurt for her because I know that pain. I don’t enjoy missing people. It’s normal, but when it causes more pain than goodness in my life, it’s time to re-access.

Today, I am seeing that every person has a reason and a season in my life. I’m not afraid of being hurt because I know it will make me better. Letting Go is a must to keep growing.

Pain can be healthy if we allow it to do it’s job and then let it go. Don’t take is so personally.

Are you familiar with The Four Agreements? I have been pondering them this week, and they have reaffirmed a few of my beliefs. They are #1. Be impeccable with your word. #2. Don’t take anything personally. #3. Don’t make assumptions. #4. Always do your best.

Don’t take anything personally and don’t make assumptions. Those alone are life changers.

Melody Beattie says, “We will be guided into understanding what we need to do to take care of ourselves. We will begin to trust our instincts, our feelings, our thoughts. We will know when to go, to stop, to wait. We will learn a great truth; the plan will happen in spite of us, not because of us.” Thank you God in advance for Your plan and not mine. Be present and give it time.