Love and Light

Today is her birthday and she turned 21.

She’s not here though. She’s in England.

It’s an odd feeling for both of us. We were texting the other night about her turning 21, and she said, “I wish I were five.” Well, my darling. I remember five, and wondered if I’d do anything different? Then she said, “We have a beautiful life.”

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Here she is at 5 years old.

She is the reason I started this Blog.

Just because I’m  taking a break from Blogging, doesn’t mean I cannot celebrate this day with you. The meaningful work-To serve the people I care about by writing another chapter. Let’s write more chapters.

One of my favorite pictures of us was right after we moved into our first home together. It was a tiny house situated on 40 acres of land. I kept her hook baited, while she fished from the pier. That pier is where I stood with God every morning before dawn. That was also the house that taught us how to kill scorpions.

We were walking to the truck, and you grabbed me for a selfie. We weren’t wearing any makeup, and I had forgotten to use eye drops that morning, but it was a moment. Even blurry-eyed, we have that ‘deep in your heart’ happiness. Our life felt groundless, as the only thing we knew we had was God, and He has us.

2014
March 2014

We’ve had chickens, kittens, dogs, and a baby duck live with us. You think it’s normal to hang a disco ball in an old oak tree. When we decided to move, I had to leave it there because it was infested with ants, but you bought a new one for here.

The light from the disco ball dances across the kitchen table where you sit, but today even though your chair is empty, the light is still there. Our life is made of love and light.

I’m here to wish you a spectacular birthday! It’s a new chapter and you’re holding the pen. Touch it to the paper my darling, and make it what you want. Feel and see the love and light.

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The Velvet Timberland’s

Me: Would you like a cup of coffee? (watching the Chemex complete it’s cycle.)

Her: I just made a cup of tea.

Me: You can have both. (said with ease)

Her: What a beautiful world we live in when I can have both.

Our life is beautiful, and I think sometimes people become weary of hearing ‘all good things’ over here, but that’s what I choose to see and write about my darling.

I’m not negative and whining doesn’t suit me. I had a sponsor that I’d call and whine to and she’d call me out immediately. “Shall I fix a plate of cheese and crackers to go with that whine”, she’d retort.

So after posting Wednesday’s post with my Unicorns and Rainbows philosophy, I scraped dog poop out of the heel of my daughter’s Timberland’s. Yep. You read that correctly. Right after clicking ‘publish’, I grabbed her Tim’s, found a sink and a toothbrush and began scraping dog poop out of the ridges of the heel.

The outcome was picture worthy.

tims

My daughter was thrilled over the clean heel, and thanked me for doing it. I told her I was going to write about it, and she laughed. Knowing my Blog titles consist of three words, she suggested ‘The Shit Shoes’. That is how she saw them pre-cleaning. It’s funny how we saw them differently.

To me they have always been The Velvet Timberland’s. I still remember the first day we say them and squealed over the velvet trim, but after she stepped in dog poop, they became The Shit Shoes.

The toothbrush worked for a bit during the cleaning, but I eventually had to break out a knife. That’s how it is my darling. Hold back nothing to scrape it off and get back to the beauty.

Now, we both see them once again, as the velvet Timberland’s.

Inhale. Exhale. Dream.

I washed our bath robes today.

My daughter has so much going on in her life, the best way I can help is doing little things around the house, so her home life remains calm.

I was putting her robe in the dryer and paused to look at the label. I couldn’t recall if it was the same brand as mine. The waffle weave is similar.

It’s not the same brand, but I love what it says.

robe

That’s exactly where I stand today.

When our hearts are open, life will show us what we need to see.

When her heart needs confirmation I hope she pauses before sliding on that robe, sees the label and breathes in these three words…

Inhale. Exhale. Dream.

Hand Her Chocolate

We’re in high vibration mode this week.

My daughter is studying for finals, which she will take Saturday morning. Then Saturday afternoon, her beau arrives from England. I’ve been sitting at the kitchen table with her as she speaks strongly to her laptop screen. Challenging the competency of the practice quiz in a high pitched voice.

Then in the stillness I hear this soft, sweet voice say, “Can you hand me a piece of chocolate?”

As her Mom it’s all I knew to do for her today. I bought her favorite chocolate and placed it in a pretty dish. The dish belonged to my Mother, so it has Grammy mojo about it. She saw me walking toward the kitchen table with the dish and said, “No! Not on the kitchen table!”

I did it anyway, but not within reach.

If it helps her get through this week, I am happy to sit with her and hand her chocolate.

candydish1

The Rainbow Kitchen

My daughter and I cook and eat together.

Sometimes it’s one of us or the other depending on our week, but we enjoy doing both.

I bought this prism and hung it in one of the kitchen windows. The sun hits it just right around the time we cook dinner. Now we know when it’s time to meet in the kitchen. When it’s full of rainbows.

prism

When she’s not here I cook for myself.

I’m really into ‘bowls’ right now, so here are two recipes that are simply delicious.

Roasted Sweet Potato Black Bean Salad.

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Photo cred: Jar of Lemons.

I cut every ingredient in half to make it for just me. If you don’t have any black beans, no worries. You won’t miss them, or substitute another bean.

If you want something a little more labor intense, but well worth the effort, try The Budda Bowl.

buddabowl
Photo cred: Modern Honey

Everything cuts in half nicely for one. The Pistachio Pesto in this recipe is my most recent fave.

My daughter has tagged our kitchen, ‘The Rainbow Kitchen.’ Patiently waiting for the Unicorn. 🙂

Don’t Shrink Yourself

I awoke by what sounded like a blender.

Then that familiar scent entered my room.

My WordPress friend, Still a Dreamer, gets this moment. She refers to it as the Nectar of the Gods. Yes my darling, I woke up to the smell of a freshly brewed Chemex! Life doesn’t get any better!

chemex

My daughter is a master of the Chemex.

She taught me how to make one, but mine are never as good as hers. She has it down to a science. She has class this morning, but took time to make one knowing it would be a beautiful way to begin this day. I was giddy holding this cup of magical brew.

Yes lovely, happiness is really that simple.

As my daughter was getting ready for class, she couldn’t decide what shoes to wear. She wanted to wear her new boots, but I could sense reluctance, so I questioned her quandary. Her response wasn’t what I thought it would be. It wasn’t so much about the boots, but how tall they made her look.

She is giving a presentation in front of her class. She is 5′ 8″ tall, just a little shorter than me. As she slid on her Converse sneakers I gave her a word of advice. You see, I felt the same way at her age.

I was taller than all the boys in school and wearing heels makes me look even taller. She doesn’t want to bring attention to herself, but today I know this…

shrink

Boots on my darling. Don’t shrink yourself.

Cookies and Chemex

I’m getting the hang of this emptying nest.

My daughter has not been home this week. She has a friend visiting and they’re spending time together.

She texted me yesterday before they came by for a visit. It was nice to see them and be included in her life, but it wasn’t sad to see them leave. We do life together, but we have also acquired our own lives.

Today was yet another milestone.

My daughter and I love these little seasonal cookies made by Pillsbury. Yes, they are pure sugar and yes, they are made by a machine, but we cook and eat real food, so this is our splurge.

As I was pondering my choices for breakfast, I remembered the Easter cookies unopened in the fridge. I took one look at the doggos and said, “We’re having cookies and Chemex.”

cookies
I know they’re gross, but we love them.

This was a fine way to begin the day of this emptying nest. Cookies and Chemex.

We Are Experienced

My daughter was getting ready for school and yelled, “I’m looking in your closet!” I thought she would just borrow a t-shirt. We share those sometimes, but nope. She walked out of my room wearing a top I haven’t even worn yet!

I looked at her with curiosity and asked…

“Is that my new sleeveless mock turtleneck?”

She had chosen a classic Ralph Lauren sweater jacket to keep her arms warm. I’ve had that jacket for years, and it was broken in just right.

As I was cutting the tags off the top, I couldn’t help but grin. How cool is it that my 20 year old daughter asks to wear my clothes? I borrow hers too.

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I’m going to modify a quote from a Blog I read this week. “I feel 30 years old with 24 years experience!”

We are not old, lovely. We are experienced. 🙂

You Are Priceless

My daughter’s words are now a meme. 🙂

Baymeme

Chasing the Sunset

I’ve started my morning over twice so far.

The taste of my coffee wasn’t pleasing, so I made a Chemex. I hadn’t made one in so long, it didn’t drain completely, but this is how I felt regardless.

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Photo by Devin Avery on Unsplash

Did it not drain, or did I not give it time?

♥ ♥ ♥

This morning I recalled teaching my daughter to drive. It was a scary experience. Not teaching her to drive, but that she was learning with my truck!

When it was time for her to learn, it was time for us to move. We were living in the country on 40 acres, and the road to our house was treacherous to say the least. It had sharp curves and made of dirt.

The next house we found had straight highway running to it. The first time she went 65 mph she exclaimed, “This is exhilarating!”

I sat in the passenger seat, drinking in the excitement on her face. You want that look to last, but soon after she learned to drive she began adulting. Then you hope they remember the moments which caused that look.

♥ ♥ ♥

One time we were driving home, and she turned off the main road. It was late in the day and the Texas sky was pink and gold. Her favorite time of day. I didn’t know where she was taking us, as she turned down one road, and then the next.

She parked the truck and stared straight ahead. She had run out of road trying to get close to the sunset.

She said, “I was chasing the sunset.”

We sat in silence watching the sun go down.

Chasing that sunset was exhilarating for her, even though it was out of reach. I was happy she tried without worrying what the end result may be.

I hope you never stop chasing the sunset.

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Photo by Sapan Patel on Unsplash