Feel the Music

I tell my daughter to look for windows.

It’s not always a door God will open.

I’ve sang this song in my heart for her since she was small. Today, we sing it for one another.

Stop Feeling Guilty

Yesterday, I slept for a solid 15 hours.

When I fell asleep it was daylight, and when I awoke it was daylight. There are no regrets.

My body was tired, and today it feels more human.

When deciding what to wear for the day, I chose a t-shirt that says, “100% Human”, on the little front pocket, just as a mental note of what I need to be.

I yearned for simple pleasures today. I wanted to wash my clothes in perfume, but my bottle of Nu Wash was empty. The hardware store I went.

Being away from home for several days, there was not much food in the house, but I opted for the grocery store next to the hardware store. Simply stocked with less distractions and minimal driving.

My initial thought was the frozen organic food section for something to pop in the oven. Something pre-made, but I don’t do a lot of pre-made food. If it has more than 5 ingredients listed, I need to recognize every ingredient. I’m just weird that way.

As an example, I bought some pasta, and saw a container of Alfredo sauce. It was a good brand, but had chemicals listed. Butter, flour, cream and Parmesan equal cream sauce, and I had everything at home but the cream, so I bought some cream.

Standing in the checkout of the store, there was a conversation going on between cashier and customer. The customer was buying a reusable K-Cup. She was telling the cashier it would save her money on coffee. The cashier told her a bag of coffee would last him a year. I was having trouble comprehending this conversation, and felt guilty.

Save money on coffee? Out of all the things you can save money on you’re going to choose coffee?

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Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

It would probably shock you to know how much I spend on a bag of coffee, but seeing the picture above become reality at a moments notice is priceless. I don’t own a TV, or have a cable bill.

I’d rather have good coffee, and perfumed clothes.

Love me, love my coffee, or in the least don’t object.

Stop feeling guilty for living a life worth living.

Ready to Bloom

healI was on my way to an AA meeting yesterday, and stopped by to see Stephanie. She is my plant Guru. I’m not sure she realizes the magnificent healing she has brought to my life through these plants she encouraged me to bring home. It was time to buy my first one that would bloom. I spotted a pot that made me smile, and the plant we chose is big!

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Yes. I blew my Saturday budget on a pot and plant. No regrets.

She told me it is a good plastic one, but it looked real!

On the way home, I stopped at a small Farmer’s Market.

There is something about people sitting in 100 degree heat, that deserve our attention. A young lady was sitting at a table filled with bottles of honey. We began talking, and she invited me to her church. I listened as she told me more.

What made my ears perk was a study they have on Wednesday nights. It’s by Beth Moore, entitled, “Believing God.” I did this study years ago, and it was enlightening.

Believing God is what I’ve been doing, but it would be nice to do the study again. She is going to text me a reminder, but I was standing there because of the label on her honey.

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Aren’t we supposed to Bee Love? I believe so.

As I was walking away she said, “I am looking for a mentor! A Godly woman I can model my life after.” I didn’t respond, but Wednesday night I will be at that study. I hear you God.

This journey  began with my daughter wanting Boston Ferns.

As I was leaving Stephanie’s, she said the main thing people ask her is how to grow a Boston Fern. The thought intimidated me too, but they are huge now! I told her about mine, and she said, “If you can grow a Boston Fern, you are the bomb!” All I did was care. I hugged Stephanie and said, “You make my life more beautiful.” She exclaimed, “That made my day!” She helped give me my beautiful life back.

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Double bloom Pink Hibiscus and Mochee.

God knows when we are ready to bloom. Can you feel it?.

Them Three Days

This is the first time, in three days, I’ve turned on my laptop. I pulled back my bedroom drapes this morning, just to make sure there was still a world. I’ve been asleep for 3 days.

Before Chemo, this would never have happened. Oh sure, I could take a nap every now and then, but to allow my body to curl up and just sleep? A toothache was the culprit, but is getting better. I have heard that Chemo is hard on your teeth, but I wasn’t prepared for this.

I lit some of my favorite candles, and just went with it.

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My sponsor told me years ago, a lot can happen in 3 days. She would always suggest, waiting 3 days before making any monumental decisions, or taking action. Something would happen to give me a revelation, or the time would cause it’s importance to fall away.

One thing I wanted to accomplish this week was give my daughter a ‘Birthday week.’ I don’t believe I’ve ever done it before, maybe when she was little, but she turns 17, August 8th. So, I went around to different shops, and collected 7 little things I thought she would like. Little things to remind her of who she is, where we’ve been, and where we’re headed.

Even with this nasty toothache, God woke me up these last three days, to give her one.

I had the clarity of mind, to write a note about the item, which is all the writing I’ve done, up until now. I loved writing her the note more than anything, because the words just flowed from my heart to hers. She got choked up a couple of times, but there should be emotion in our writing. I’m so grateful to have been able to do that for her each day.

Today is Day 3, of her birthday week, and I’m having trouble deciding what to give her next. I’m thinking it will be the LED sign that says, “No Regrets.” I want her to know at this young age, to live a life of no regrets. That means doing things that scare you sometimes, like Chemo, but I can honestly say, I have no regrets in my life. Just keep living, loving, and learning.

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Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 16-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. She found out in March of this year that she has Breast Cancer. Going through Chemo, and believing God for a miracle is where she stands. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

I’m Ready Now

Driving down the road this afternoon, to pick up my daughter, this song came on the radio. It’s by Plumb, and she always pierces my soul. I listened intently to the words, and discovered they describe this path I’m on. I just wanted to share this with you here.

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Being a Letitgocoach, the first few words caught my attention quick. I’ve heard this song before, but today it was like she was singing it for me. Do you have days like that?

The next verse that spoke to me was, “I ran away from you, and I did what I wanted to, but I don’t want to let you down. Lord, I’m ready now.” It was difficult not to cry while driving.

I don’t believe I run away from God anymore. Oh yes…I used to quite often. He always positioned me just so, and what was in front of me seemed insurmountable. What I didn’t realize then was, everything we go through prepares us for what’s ahead. I was ready for what He gave me, but I allowed fear to set in.

So, there I would go down a bunny trail, and do what I wanted to do. There were missed opportunities I’m sure, but I have no regrets. God is patient, and kind. He would wait for me to get done doing my thing, and give me another chance. No more letting Him down.

He has given me a beautiful life. Even though the path I’m on has a good deal of uncertainty, I can trust Him. Looking over the past year alone, I can see where everything up to this point, has prepared me for where I am. I have moments of fear of what lies ahead, but I’m not alone. Today, I can finally say, Lord, I’m ready now. Let’s do this thing.

 

Let It Go Coach

It can be tough being a coach. People expect you to behave like one. My daughter tells me every now and then, “I think someone wrote a Blog about how you’re acting right now.” Mr. Smith laughs and says, “You need to let it go!” So what happens when I need to have a big ‘ol fit? I wait till everyone leaves… go outside on the porch and have at it!

Let-go-life-amazing-hd-wallpapre-with-quoteThis was the question I started asking myself a while back and continue to do so today. “How would my life be different if I learned to let go of things that have already let go of me?” I was legally married for 25 years. Ten years into it, I had a spiritual awakening and stopped drinking. God completely took the desire away from me. The marriage was okay for another five and then we told ourselves we would stay together for the children. Our parents did the same, but I refused. The children knew we were miserable and here I am. I let go of who had let me go.

I still do this today and by God’s grace I’ve gotten quicker! The letting go process has been huge in helping me let go in all areas of my life. When I wake up filled with peace, I know I’m living a clean and healthy life. If I wake up feeling uneasy, God is trying to show me something I need to change, or warning me before a mild storm. The storms are a lot less intense than they once were. Either they are smaller or I have become stronger and more secure in who I am.

There are days when the handful of people I allow into my personal life, enjoy picking on me. They tell me I need to Let It Go Coach! That’s okay though. I know they love me and I get to fully love them. That is the beauty of Let It Go.

biopicBarb is a writer and Mom to her 15 year old daughter, Bailey. She has been an Entrepreneur for 25 years and has ran several successful businesses. She gave up that life to write and become a Let It Go Coach. Barb has experience, strength and hope to share, and wants others to enjoy their lives. She hosts a Virtual Workshop every other month. The sessions last 8 weeks and were instrumental in giving Barb the beautiful life she enjoys today. You may connect with her via email for more info. Letitgocoach@gmail.com