Tag: #singlemom

Follow Your Heart

My daughter left me a note of advice.

Reading this part makes me feel like I did something right. How many 19-year-old’s say this?

“Take this time while I’m gone to do things that fill you up and make your heart smile.”

This morning, I woke up feeling guilty about recent purchases. Does that ever happen to you?

I’m over it now because without even realizing it, I took her advice and acted on it.

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Photo Credit: Scott Stabile

As you see in A Doggo’s Life, our doggo’s are sharing a dog bed. I wanted our new puppo to have her own bed, so went in search of the perfect dog bed. In my mind I pictured exactly what it should look like, but 4 stores later didn’t result in that bed.

That was my mind, but what did my heart say?

Step One.

Back before Thanksgiving, my daughter and I were in a store where everything is pretty, but reasonably priced. I saw a rug that made my heart smile. My daughter saw my face light up, but she also knew we were setting aside all extra money for England.

Guess what? She’s in England and I still have money. Glory to God!

Yesterday, I went back to that store see if the rug was still there. It had been months, so what were the odds? Would it be on sale after Christmas?

It was in the rug bin along with one other rug.

It wasn’t on sale, but I had a price in mind that I was willing to pay. I found a sales lady, and inquired about the price of the rug. Full price was too much, but I’d walk out of there with it if she took $50 off.

Step Two.

The sales lady found an online coupon she could apply to meet my price! Then it became confusing.

She asked, “Is that the color you want? We have another one in the back that’s grey.”

The rug standing in the bin is a light color, which I gravitate toward, and it has pale gold shimmers running through it, but my daughter loves grey!

They grey one was equally pretty, and I knew my daughter would love it. What did I do? Like any good Mother, I loaded the grey one in my truck.

Score one for the mind.

Step Three.

I sat in front of the store staring at the rug laying across the backseat. The sales lady told me if it wasn’t right, to bring it back and get the other one, but I wanted to know in my heart what to do.

I found myself walking back into the store swapping the grey for the one I wanted. I followed my heart all the way through. My daughter will be happy.

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Looks like we found the perfect dog bed after all.

Taking Her Advice

She followed her heart, and so shall I.

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Photo Cred: Simply Semloh Eiffel Tower lastnight.

The Queen B

My daughter is still in England, but will be on her way to Paris to celebrate New Years.

I’m home making changes to the house.

I read a Blog where one Mom has a stack of shower curtains. She changes them out seasonally, which I thought was a sweet idea. My daughter and I don’t have room to store things plus, I love my shower curtain, but could see room for improvement.

Our shower curtain hooks are plastic.

We’ve had them a long time, and they’re beginning to break. I spotted these on Etsy and fell in love.

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My daughter’s nickname is “Queen B.’

The choices we make snowball over time.

Three years ago, my daughter would not be in England for three weeks. I wasn’t sure it was possible a year ago, because when she told me her plan, I saw dollar signs floating through the air.

By the grace of God, she’s on a trip of a lifetime.

I could have bought a new shower curtain, but opted for bee rings. It’s the small choices over a period of time that add up to a beautiful life.

All hail to the Queen! xx

Be the Mama

I try not to rush anymore, but recently I found myself getting sucked into life’s frenzy.

This morning it was time to stop.

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Photo by Riccardo Bresciani on Pexels.com

I’ve been watching my daughter.

At 19 years old she has wisdom and discernment, and makes sound decisions. I’ve stepped back to let her practice running her own life. Watching how she manages it, and giving her plenty of space. She’s been adulting very well except for this one thing….

She’s exhausted.

Mentally and physically.

Time For a Change

I took a long look at how busy she has been. We both have, but I could also feel a disconnect. We are more than roommates. We actually do this life together, but when she came home Monday from her Dad’s, she sat down and fell asleep in her chair.

Her visits with her Dad haven’t changed since the move, even though the distance has.  He’s only ten minutes away now instead of an hour, but she still packs her duffel bag every Friday, and heads to his home. Stays the weekend and comes back here on Monday. She has three days before doing it all again.

I’m Still the Mama

She communicates with her Dad, and they make their own plans, until this morning. While she slept, I texted him and told him she is staying home this weekend. It was time to step in and be the Mama.

When she awoke, I told her what I did, and she looked mortified that I had stepped in, but you know what else I saw? Relief. And a slight smile.

This weekend she doesn’t have to be an adult. We will spend time together doing whatever we choose.

Today was a good day to step in and be the Mama.

That’s True Love

My daughter will be gone most of the day, but we begin each day together. She makes a Chemex, because she has it down to a science, whereas I do not. I sit in the den anticipating that magical cup of brew.

This morning she did something so special. She has this coffee cup she knows I love. It’s just the right size, and I use it when she’s not here.  When she is here, she usually uses the cup, but not this morning.

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Blue bottle coffee cup.

She sat the cup on my side of the table.

This was a special moment to receive this cup from her. It was a small gesture, and maybe to some go unnoticed, but it’s how we show our love and care.

The smallest of things create magical moments.

While she is out and about adulting, I began thinking what I could do for her. We have this inside joke now that she is almost 20 years old. I tell her she doesn’t need me nearly as much as she thinks she does, but there is this one thing she loves for me to do. Wash her sheets in perfume wash.

She’s jokingly asked if I will come and change her sheets the rest of my life. Well darling, maybe not every week, but when time allows, I will do that. It was 32 degrees this morning, so her favorite flannel sheets are being washed in perfume for her bed.

For me, it was getting to use her cup in her presence, but for her it will be these sheets.

That’s true love.

So Many Firsts

My daughter is at the eye doctor today.

She called and made an appointment yesterday to have her eyes checked. What an adult thing to do.

Earlier this week she made a GoFundMe page. That was a gutsy move. She must have heard me say, “No guts, no glory.” I’m in awe watching her set her sails.

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Photo by Vaibhav Kashyap on Pexels.com

We raise them to the best of our ability, and then watch them as they go.

I’m not going to try and catch you up on what all has happened. I will let her do that in her own words. She has changed/grown so much this year.

I feel like today, we hit a milestone. The beginning of the ‘Mission accomplished’ phase of the journey.

The day I left her father, she saw me truly follow my heart, and she’s been watching me do so ever since. It didn’t surprise me one bit when she said, “I want to spend Christmas in England this year.” It will be the first Christmas we didn’t celebrate together.

My daughter writes. Photography is her love, but her words add life to each photo. Here is the link to her Blog. Thank you for sitting here with me today as the grand list begins of so many firsts.

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My daughter as of yesterday. Her shirt says, “I’m the Daddy.”

The Clean Spot

Recently, my daughter told me something that I could have taken the wrong way. She said something to the affect of, “I’m not sure you taught me good things growing up.” Here is her example.

While she was growing up, I didn’t want to get upset over a spill, or if she dropped something on the floor, and it made a mess. I enjoyed showing her the proper way to clean up the mess. Life can get messy, and it was my job to show her what to do if it did.

I’m her Mama, not her lifetime repair woman.

To make light of the situation, I would tell her, “After you clean up that mess, it will be the cleanest spot in the house!”, and that became our motto.

She was at a friends house helping them do laundry.

She spilled some laundry detergent on the carpet.

The detergent was blue, and the carpet was white.

She said as she was down on her hands and knees, scrubbing the carpet, she was shaking her head and laughing at my voice in her head! She said out loud, “This is going to be one heck of a clean spot!”

She had heard those words many times before.

We were newly on our own, and standing in the check out line of a grocery store. The check out line was always a stressful moment because she was hoping I had enough money to pay for the purchases. What she didn’t know was, I had already tallied them up in my head to avoid embarrassment.

She wanted to be helpful, and insisted on carrying the milk to the car. She looked so small, holding that gallon of milk. It was gathering condensation being out of the cooler, and was slippery. She was trying to hold onto it, but it didn’t take long for it to slip from her hands, and go crashing to the floor.

She was sure everyone in the store was looking.

The gallon of spilled milk looked more like a lake.

The cashier sympathized, and called for a clean up.

I placed my arm around my daughter’s shoulders and guided her mortified body to the exit saying, “That’s gonna be one heck of a clean spot.”