Get to Growing

This meme resonated with me and has been sitting on my desktop all year.

raining

For months, it feels like there’s been more rain than sunshine in Texas. I’ve written about blooming, but today I’m wondering if that’s the easy part. Like an exhalation.

The part of the bloom worth remembering is everything leading up to it. Wind, rain and cooler temperatures anyone?

We grow through what we go through.

This has helped me see the rainy days in a whole new light. Maybe blooming is the easy part. Growth happens with the rain.

Let it rain and get to growing.

Here and Now

Today is one of those rare days where I feel I’m right where I need to be. I spent the better part of yesterday cleaning my home, and rearranging items to make them more eye pleasing. I bought a lamp.

I’ve always been drawn to light.

I didn’t need a lamp, but this lamp replaced one that wasn’t giving off the right light for the space it was in. I had gone to this store to find a storage container when I saw the lamp. I walked out of the store carrying the lamp and no storage container. 🙂

lamp
Shout our to Little Fears for Lucy hanging in the background.

I love the streams of light.

♥ ♥ ♥

When my daughter and I moved out of the country and into this sleepy little lake town, I wasn’t sure it was the right move. It took time for it to feel right.

One year later, I’m working part time at the local pizza place. A young couple sitting at a table asked, “Why are you here?”, like I looked out of place.

My response was, “To bless others.”

He quoted a scripture and we began talking about God and what He is doing in our lives. I mentioned this Blog and my hope to bless others through writing. He told me this town I live in is for writers.

He began telling me some of the history of the town and it used to be considered a haven for writers. His neighbor rents his house to writers throughout the year when they need a quiet space for inspiration.

♥ ♥ ♥

When I first began at the pizza place, I asked God, “Why?” Three months later I’m able to relax and have meaningful conversations with patrons. They bless me just as much as I bless them.

God puts us in places that makes us wonder ‘why’, but we need to trust it’s part of a greater plan.

It may not make sense, and it will be uncomfortable at first, but today I know we’re right where we need to be.

Feel the Music

When we got in the car he hit Bluetooth and said, “Listen to this. Cody Johnson has a new album.”

Cody is a good ‘ol Texas boy, so you’ll need to have ears for country music, otherwise they may bleed. 🙂

When we decide to sign that piece of paper to make what we have legal, this song will play at our wedding.

I Love Lucy

My daughter is spending time this week with one of her best friends. Her friend goes to college in Florida, so they haven’t seen one another in years. She came to Texas to celebrate my daughter’s birthday, which was Wednesday.

Yesterday, I checked the mail, and it was stuffed with all kinds of goodness. I had ordered film for my daughter’s Instamatic camera, and it came in. We weren’t sure the film was going to arrive in time for her to use it during her friend’s visit, but God took care of it. My package from the UK was there as well, and I squealed with excitement!

Lucy was here!

lucy
Lucy from Little Fears.

Peter Edwards writes a Blog entitled, Little Fears.

He showed up on my Blog during my Cancer Journey.

Peter has always been an encouragement to me, and I admire his passion for what he does. I believe we have numerous opportunities as a community of Bloggers to encourage one another. Purchasing Lucy was my way of giving Peter a little bit of encouragement.

There is something about this scary looking creature, holding a heart that makes me smile. I can’t tell if she is offering it, or taking it.

My daughter and her friend stopped by yesterday just to give hugs. She saw Lucy displayed in the frame we had chosen for her together. I was beaming with love over Lucy, and my daughter shouted, “I love Lucy!”

Thank you Peter for helping us face our Little Fears.

From the Heart

Do you ever feel led to buy something, and not sure why?

I was in an antique book shoppe, and found a copy of one of my favorite books. It was beautiful, and I wanted it, but I already owned a copy. So, I left the shop without it.

Not getting the book bothered me for weeks, but I didn’t need it. Then God revealed it wasn’t for me, I was just supposed to buy it. It was to be mailed to one of my dearest friends. I called the shop, thinking it might be gone by now, but it was still there, and has been mailed to my friend.

This happens to my daughter too. She was in a coffee shop in Austin, TX, and saw a newly released book about brewing the perfect coffee, at home. She felt led to buy it, but we know how to brew coffee in numerous ways, so it wasn’t for us. She brought it home, laid it under the Christmas tree, and waited for God to reveal who it was for.

Our favorite coffee shop is Chaparral Coffeein Lockhart. It’s right down the road from our house, and we go there frequently. The coffee is excellent, but we love the people who work there. They take such good care of us, and we feel loved. The book was to be given to the owner, Austin.

You never know what day and time he works, but we trusted that today was the day! God had it all lined up.

We walked in with the book, and there he stood behind the counter. We ordered our drinks, and he made them in our favorite house mugs. I paid for the Chai Lattes before giving him the book. I didn’t want him to feel obligated to give us our drinks. He loved the book, and was very thankful.

We had just caught him before his shift ended, but as he was leaving, he walked over, and stood between us, as we sat on stools. Wrapping an arm around our shoulders, he squeezed us and said, “Merry Christmas girls! Take those cups with you.” We were stunned, but hugged him back.

mugs

 

You just can’t out give God when you give from the heart.

Dear Sober Me

It’s been raining this week in Texas. The sun broke through the clouds this morning, beamed through the front windows, and filled my home with light. The air outside was cool, but the warmth of the sun felt fabulous. Now it’s cloudy again, but that is only the weather.

I am grateful every morning I wake up, but even more grateful to wake up sober. Today marks 18 years of sobriety for this chick. So, even though the weather is cloudy, my mind is not, and neither are my eyes. There is a lot on my mind at the moment, but my eyes are shining bright! Asking God for His help 18 years ago, was the best decision I ever made.

I just returned form a very long appointment with a Radiologist. Just to check my level of patience, they had me waiting from the very beginning. I went yesterday, which living in the woods, is a 45 minute drive to see them, one way. They had me scheduled with the wrong doctor, and asked me to come back today. So I did, and there was more waiting.

A nurse came in and asked me lots of questions. Once they were answered, another lady came in that is the doctor’s assistant. She liked to talk, and I sat there listening to her describe every aspect of radiation. By the third time I looked down at my lap and zoned out, she got the message and stopped talking. I just wanted to see the doctor and leave.

The doctor eventually came in and went over the same information as she. It was like they were trying to talk me into it or something, so I said, “What are my next steps, and when do we start?” They said their goodbye’s, and told me to expect a phone call this week, or next, about scheduling a scan of my breast.

Two weeks after the scan, they will start treatment.

sobriety

It’s a good day to be sober. I cannot imagine following this Breast Cancer Journey hungover.

God took my desire to drink completely away when I asked. I can’t recall a craving in all these years, but the thought of a drink has crossed my mind. Fortunately, I learned very well that a glass of wine, or ten, does not fix anything. The circumstance I was drinking over was waiting on me the next day, along with whatever chaos I caused while drinking.

I was hoping my Breast Cancer Journey would be over by the end of the year. Radiation will begin sometime in December, and be 5 days a week, for six weeks. The journey will fall into the new year. My sponsor would ask me, “Would you like some cheese with that whine?” I have nothing to whine about. We will continue the journey as planned, and stay sober me.

This Ain’t Easy

If you had $20 to your name, how would you spend it? Years ago, I would spend that money on diapers. Today, I would spend $13 on my favorite candle, and the rest would be a toss up between a Pumpkin Spice Latte, or actual food.

Does that sound silly? I try to be a good steward of everything God gives me, including money. I think He knows, there are a lot of small things I would rather buy before food. It’s just not that important to me. A home that smells like fall from an amazing candle? The moment of savoring my favorite fall coffee drink? Those are important to me.

faithIt’s not easy living in the calling God gives you. God put a desire in me to write and that is what I do. Is it perfect grammar? I’m from Texas, it ain’t gonna be perfect.

I know one of my God given gifts is an Encourager. God prompted me once my legal separation began to start writing publicly. I have always kept a journal, but He wanted to show people my life. Walking through alcoholism and a divorce wasn’t easy, but it was possible. That is all my daughter and I need. Possible.

It is all thanks to God. He gets all the glory for it and that is what I’m here to share.

I’ve had the life of get up, take kids to school, go to work, pick kids up, eat dinner, go to bed and start all over. When it was time for my son to attend high school, the thought horrified me. He was such a good kid, I was afraid he would be eaten alive, so I homeschooled him. Then my daughters school closed down after her 3rd grade year, and I chose to homeschool her. That was the beginning of quality of life for us.sky

When she was younger, I would take her to work with me. As she got older, employers started to frown upon that, so God opened a door for me to work from home. When she turned 13, the beginning of her teenage years, I worked virtually for a friend of mine in California and still do, part time. It was less hours and less money, but the rewards!

That was when I found it to be true that we can make better choices and have a better life. My daughter took this picture of the sky behind our house. She goes outside almost everyday between 6 and 7 pm. The time she goes out depends on the colors reflecting in the house from outside. It’s the beauty factor that gets her attention.

This morning, I was going through a file I have for her in my email. In it was an email she sent a year ago, wishing me a Happy Birthday. The words that jumped off the page this morning were, “I want to be like you when I grow up.” This humbled me as gratitude just spilled out for this beautiful life God has given us. Once again, this must be God.
 

Catch a Grenade

It’s early morning and all is quiet. A gnawing noise wakes me from a deep and peaceful slumber. It sounded like a mouse chewing on wood nearby.

To my further investigation I found our cat, Marsha, at the foot of my bed, on the floor eating a mouse. I was grateful she caught it, but really? Out of all the rooms to choose from she had to choose mine?

She had no regrets. She knows her worth and did a good job catching that mouse. Wanting to show me a job well done and knowing where I was that time of morning all makes sense. By the look on my face she knew it was time to take her treasure and leave. I went back to sleep.

If you live in Texas you’re going to encounter Scorpions. Bailey and I have become a pro at killing these vicious creatures. My faithful dog, Mochee was on the front porch with me yesterday evening. He was looking at me, tail wagging, happy to be in my presence, when I spotted a scorpion.

He saw it and jumped out of the way but not before it stung him on his paw. He started howling and jumping around in pain! The scorpion ran away, so Mochee did his job. I scooped him up and comforted him as he licked the injury.

It reminded me of that Bruno Mars song, Grenade and I went to look it up. My animals love their people so much! I woke up this morning assessing if the people in my life do. I am a woman of valor and deserve the very best God has for me. He gives me His best so I can share it with others. This morning, I have realized I need to make wiser choices.

Two weeks ago, our cat Marsha had kittens.

She gave birth in her kennel and they lived there for a while. Bailey and I looked in one day and they were gone. She had moved them to a basket of blankets tucked in a corner of the mud room. I hear a ruckus and walk in to find her moving them from the basket, to under the water heater. It doesn’t look like the safest place to me, but I will trust her judgement.

She will obviously catch a grenade for them too.

Gunpowder and Lace

There may come a time where we need to let go of our dream so someone else can have theirs. We work tirelessly at what seems to be something we want to achieve, but it’s like rolling a boulder uphill using our noses.

A friend of mine recently gave up her dream shop after struggling with it for as long as she could. Moving out of her dream shop, opened the door to somebody else’s.

ganl

Welcome to Bastrop Texas. I love this town and the people in it. One our favorite shop’s to visit was Gunpowder and Lace. It wasn’t so much the shop, which was unique in its own way, but the woman who owned it. She had started her business on Main Street, and moved around the corner to a rustic location.

It has a massive front porch, with a wooden swing in the corner. You could sit in the swing and watch people enter Bastrop Brewhouse, now Neighbors Kitchen and Yard, and Larryland Music. My daughter and I sat there many a time, eating Gelato and enjoying the moment. The Colorado River runs behind these businesses and is tranquil just like this town.

My friend, has decided to close the doors of Gunpowder and Lace. To this location anyway. Once you have a dream in your heart, it doesn’t leave, but it will move. She was moving to the next town over and I know she is following God. She must be because she answered the prayers of one couple in particular.

This lady had been praying for 3 years for the right location for her husband and her to open their own shop. It would be eclectic, vintage and just anything and everything they loved and wanted to share. They pulled down a side street in Bastrop, TX, and she saw Robin’s shop, Gunpowder and Lace.

She looked at her husband and said, “That’s our shop! That is the shop we’ve been praying for!”

Little did they know, Robin was on her way out in another direction. Long story short, I had the pleasure of walking into this shop Friday evening and feel the warmth, love and life of this old building renewed. They are opening their doors Valentine’s Day weekend, and we are so excited for them and Robin. Where one dream moved on, another dream began.