The In Between

Since publishing All or Nothing, I’ve been practicing holding the pose in that ‘in between’ area of life. Walking the ‘fine line’, between all or nothing.

Monday, I was driving to get a haircut and the CD player switched CD’s to a teaching I hadn’t heard in years. I didn’t remember having preacher/teacher CD’s loaded in the player, so I listened while I drove. He was talking about the ‘eventually’s’, and how the dreams in our heart come to pass eventually. It’s always God’s timing and not ours, so therein lies the in between.

I was asked to partake in a new position with one of my jobs, and went through some of the training videos to prepare for it. Then, December rolled around which is the busiest time of year for most, and the training stopped. The new position is just hanging in mid air waiting for the man I work with to pop it back into my court. If the position is meant for me, it’ll come back around, but sometimes God will test our willingness to walk in a different direction.

Show me a direction and I’ll show you a decision has been made.

It’s still warm here in Texas, but I’m keeping an eye on the Hibiscus. It’s sitting outside blooming in December, but will come indoors if the temps drops below 50 degrees Fahrenheit and remain there. This plant has taught me a lot this year and I want to protect it to learn more from it next year. You’d think full bloom would be my favorite part of this plant, but recently it’s been the in between. The bud begins to open then decides to enjoy the space of halfway there.

As you can see my darling, there is beauty in the in between.

To Be Found

In November 2020, I wrote down 3 things to keep in mind for 2021. One has come to pass, and I’m working on the second one, but that third one is a daily ‘wait and see’.

I’m not the easiest person to love. I douse my front porch with glitter, and was recently granted permission to do the same to my neighbors driveway, so Barb is glittering up the neighborhood. I noticed the other day, I was showering with soap in the shape and smell of birthday cake.

You may think I’m kidding, but nope.

Buff City Soap-Life of the Party

What was the third thing I wrote down? To fall in love.

Dating apps have become entertainment for me, and I poke fun at myself on FaceBook. Last week, a girlfriend of mine was cheering me on for still being in the dating arena. We chatted and she shared that she stopped looking about a year ago. I cannot leave the dating arena yet because I made this tiny little deal with God. For me to fall in love, I had to be willing to put myself out there to be found.

God realizes I live a fairytale lifestyle, but this a time He told me ‘no’. I fully expected my person to walk up to my front door holding my favorite cup of coffee, but that hasn’t happened. I know in my heart there is someone for me, but the odds are they’re not going to knock on the door. However, I do catch myself checking out every delivery person, just in case.

That was the first step, and it was a scary one, but I’m determined to be fearless in putting myself out there to be found.