Feel the Music

Feel the Music

My daughter received a stereo for Christmas from her Dad. This monster, is a dream come true for most. She hooked it up herself, but there was one piece she missed.

The sub-woofer.

My daughter is all about the bass. She will hear a song, and say, “Dat bass thoooo!!!” She got the cord she needed from her Dad, and hooked it up right before she left on Friday.

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You will note this sound system is against an outside wall. I walked into the kitchen after she left, and that entire wall, all the way past the kitchen was vibrating! Dat bass thoooo!

The house was literally thumpin! (My dog is getting used to it.)

To feel the music. This song just came on, and it has a lot of bass, so here ya go! The Mac says it best. “I feel it in my heart, I feel it in my soul. That’s how I know.” This is one of our favorite videos too. We would so do this. Tell me what you know!

Present Moment, Quality of life

The First Sentence

I opened a letter from the imaging center where I had my most recent mammogram. The words filled the entire page, but after that first sentence, I didn’t need to read anymore.

“We are pleased to inform you that the results of your recent breast imaging exam(s) show no signs of Breast Cancer.” This last letter was the opposite of the first one I received exactly one year ago. The first letter told me the exam saw Cancer, and the last one said, “End of story.” There was a beginning, and an end, but my story is far from over.

Some of the journey is documented here, but who you see today is the woman on the other side. How did I survive? Through love, and God. That is also what you read about here.

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In the same way the first sentence of that letter caught my attention, so will the first sentence of a Blog. I’ve been reading a lot of Blogs recently, and they show me who I used to be. I’ve had the privilege of being a lot of what I read. The Entrepreneur, Motivational Speaker, Stepford Wife, Preacher/Teacher, and those roles helped create who I am today.

Even though I may not fully see her yet, I know where she’s been. I don’t write long Blogs, because after about 500 words, I lose interest, and imagine you would too.

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Do you ever wonder why you’re here? I have been thinking about that a lot, and I don’t really know why. All I know is, God opened this door three years ago, and here I stand.

I love to write, and am working on two books to be published. I want to give you something to hold in your hands, write in, and highlight different colors. Using a Kindle, or tablet is all fine and good, but it’s not the same highlighting a screen, as it is a paper page.

Seeing who you’re not anymore, helps you along the path of who you want to be. Every circumstance has strengthened my character, and my relationship with God. Sitting here I am reminded of the first sentence of an Ed Sheeran song. “I gave all my oxygen to people that could breathe.” Been there done that. Today, I can tell you how good it feels to breathe.

meBarbara is a Writer, a Mom to her 17-year-old daughter, a recent Breast Cancer survivor, and she loves God. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

Present Moment, Quality of life

Leap of Faith

My daughter is back home from a long weekend at ACL. Her boyfriend is back in Missouri safe and sound. She is exhausted, and a feeling a bit under the weather. This gives me the chance to take care of her, like she has me for months. It feels good to be able to give back.

There is a Meme I’ll be sharing at the end of this Blog, that has been on my mind ever since I saw it a week ago. It gave me great comfort in knowing it is true. There have been many a time in my life where I went down a side trail, and off God’s path. He’s a patient God, and stands there waiting for my return. He also watches just to make sure I don’t hurt myself.

I took a minute from typing, and pulled up Facebook. TobyMac had posted this, and it was right in front of me, as I went back to typing. I take it as a sign from God that what I did today was okay with Him. You see, God showed me something a couple of months ago, and I didn’t do it. I talked myself out of it because I didn’t feel qualified to go through with it.

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Have you ever done that?

God lays something right in front of you, and you say, “No thank you God. I can’t do that.”

I believe that is the idea. There is no way I could write, without God. Oh, I have tried! They all end up in the trash. Pretty awful stuff, but if I wait on God to prompt me what to write, that is what you get to read. That is why there is not a consistent schedule with my posts.

I wait. Sometimes waiting is good, but other times it’s disobedience to Him if it’s out of fear. Today, I did what He showed me a couple of months ago. I joined Patreon. My account is on hold while they check me out, so I can’t share it with you yet. It is a site where you can donate on a monthly basis to the creative of your choice. To be a part of adding fruit to their labor.

To receive financial support for what God has called me to do. A leap of faith is always scary. For me, it’s God calling me out of my comfort zone, into bigger and better things.

The only way to know if it’s from God, and to see if it will even work, it to just do it. So, we will see! I know these things take time and patience, which is not a problem for me. I also know God wants me to write a book, and that is what Patreon will help me do. Not only financially, but it will hold me accountable to you, as I write it. You will become my fuel.

So, back to the Meme I promised at the beginning of this Blog. Here it is Beautiful Souls, and I pray that you will look at your leap of faith today, and just do it. Even if you’re afraid.

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Barbara is a God follower, a Writer, and Mom to her 17-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Part of her mission is to show people they can start over at 50. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

Breast Cancer Journey, Present Moment

Cry It Out

I just needed to write. There is something about it that pulls all the frazzled ends back into my tapestry of life. I should probably stop thinking, and just write.

waitingThis is one of my favorite pictures, and I used it in a Blog written one year ago. To think of it today reminds me, this has been my year of waiting. I don’t mind waiting. God has given me plenty of practice, so I’ve become relatively good at it. It helps when you know what you’re waiting for. This week it was a call.

A week ago Monday, I had a call from my breast surgeon to see when I wanted to schedule the lumpectomy. We talked about Chemo, how I was doing, and when was my last treatment scheduled.

It felt like two doses of The Red Devil had been harder on me than the first 12 weeks combined. I still had two more doses to go, and in all honesty I wasn’t sure my body could take it. She said, “Maybe we can go ahead and do surgery then.” A light came on at the end of the tunnel.

She had to talk with my doctor, but she felt confident the lump was plenty small enough by now to be removed. So, the waiting began. I didn’t expect it to take this long, but 10 days later I received the verdict from my doctor. He said, “No.” That was when I had to cry it out.

I don’t know what God’s plan is, but it broke my heart when He said, “No”, to that plan.

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Did I mention the part where I got so pissed off, I called and left a message with my nurse that I wasn’t coming to Chemo next week? I was nice, but it happened, and it got her attention! She called me right back, so I didn’t have to wait long at all on that call.

So, I’ve gotten disappointed, angry, and cried, all within two hours time. I’m over it.

I try not to let my emotions get the best of me. I have always tried to keep it all under control, and let things like this just roll down my back. It normally works because I know a large part of life is a test. If I can look at it as a test, and God as my teacher, it really inspires me to pass that test. I felt like I was failing the test, but then I realized, this test isn’t over.

I will know it’s over when God gets the glory from this journey. He gets the glory every morning when I wake up, but He is a Master at showing off in my life. He knows I love spectacular endings, so that is what I’m waiting for. I don’t see it yet, but I know its there.

 

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Breast Cancer Journey, Present Moment, Quality of life

Back to Chemo

I fell asleep early lastnight. Netflix continually lost the audio of the show I was trying to watch, so I just gave up, and shut everything down, including me. Perks of adulthood.

I woke up around 3:30 am, and remembered what day it is. My three week break from Chemo is coming to an end. Today is the Monday before Chemo Tuesday. There are so many feelings that go along with that thought. My first thought was, this is #2, out of four, so I’m almost halfway done. I am learning so much along this path, and one thing is, God is big.

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I have been sitting on this Meme for a while now. Just pondering it’s meaning, and today I see what it means to me in so many ways. There are no surprises to God. He knows our life story, because He is the Author, so me going through Chemo is no big shocker for Him.

Looking back, I can see how everything just fell into place. My daughter and I have lived on our own, with God’s guidance, for almost 4 years. It was my job to keep her safe, and care for her the best way I knew how. Living life together, one day at a time, has brought me an extreme amount of joy. Today, it would seem, our roles have reversed thanks to Chemo.

I didn’t know I would be battling Breast Cancer this year, but God did. It gives me great comfort knowing He has already gone before me to fight this battle, and God always wins.

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John 13:7 says, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”

My daughter started driving the day she got her permit. We were leaving the DMV, and she asked, “Can I drive?” That was about a year ago. She learned to drive with my Ford F150, and I told her, “If you can drive this truck, you can drive almost anything.” It was hard for me to sit in the passenger seat at times, but she never put a scratch on it. She’s an excellent driver.

Daddy stepped in at Christmas, and gave her a car. Actually, he bought her two. The first one he bought, was her dream machine. A canary yellow, 2010, Chevy Camaro SS. I was amazed, and told him, “Uh, No.” She had been dreaming about this car, and he had searched the ends of the earth to find it. It was the hardest thing ever for me to say no.

He then bought her a more sensible car. Still sporty, but safer. Great gas mileage, and a thumpin’  sound system which is vital to her. He still has the Camaro parked behind his office. I am sure she drives it every chance she gets, but she now sees why it was a no. It’s way too much car for her at this time. Knowing her, she will grow into it, and it will be hers.

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IF she hadn’t started driving when she did, I wouldn’t have a live in driver to Chemo.

What started out as something that had to be done, has turned into something she wants to do. She wants to drive me, and care for me in this way. It was very difficult for me to allow this to happen, but I knew I couldn’t drive myself. Chemo has helped me surrender to areas of my life that I couldn’t before. Sometimes, I have to tell myself no, and let people care for me.

Today, I will clean house, and restock the fridge. Even though I don’t know how I will feel after Tuesday, I can prepare. Healthy snacks are a must after Chemo. I think I’ll buy flowers too. The last time I encountered The Red Devil, which is A/C’s nickname, I slept for 3 days. It took another 2 days to feel somewhat human again, and 6 days to have a clear thought.

You may not hear much from me this week. I know what to do after Chemo, which is not a lot. Letting my body and mind rest is all I know to do. I may not know much of God’s plan, but I know He has one. I would have never imagined Chemo would be a part of it, but this path is only temporary. He is teaching me patience, because we are nowhere near done yet.

 

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Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 16-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. She found out in March of this year that she has Breast Cancer. Going through Chemo, and believing God for a miracle is where she stands. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

Bailey being blessed, Flying Free, Moving On, Quality of life

Flying the Nest

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Stepping out on my front porch this morning, I looked up at the bird’s nest that has housed four baby birds, and saw only two. They have grown up so fast! Just a few weeks ago, I saw four bald heads up there. They had a few, small random hairs on their heads. I could relate!

I have raised my daughter to the best of my ability, and trusted God to do the rest. I have not said ‘No’ to her very much because I trust her judgement. I would rather her learn everything she can, while she’s still in the nest, so when she flies, she will know what to expect. I want her to have strong wings, like the eagle, but watching her learn to fly sucks.

She is going to a concert tonight without me. I have always told her, “I trust you. It’s just the people around you I have a problem with.” The band is Twenty-one Pilots. She was introduced to this band by a boy that came into her life a year ago via social media. This boy was in a world of pain, and she was there to listen. It was hard to watch, and she got hurt, but she learned a lot from that boy. God’s grace was upon her, and He healed her ruptured heart.

I prayed for God to send the right person to accompany her to this concert. I wanted her to go with someone I felt would protect her from the crowd. One of her very best friends is a guy she doesn’t get to see very often. One time they were hanging out together, and she asked to ride his skateboard. He handed it to her, and she hopped on. When he saw she was going to crash, he dove toward her and landed between her and the pavement. He is going.

Yesterday, I did something completely illegal. She received a letter from her boyfriend, that lives in Missouri, and she wrote him right back. He had gone on a mission trip, and didn’t have his phone for 10 days, so her wrote her a letter. The good ol’ days right? She wanted to mail her letter to him immediately, so I sat still and told her, “Go ahead. You know how to drive.”

She has been driving since January with a permit, and will have her license in a couple of weeks. She is an excellent driver. Better than most adults I know. She drives me to Chemo once a week, and I usually sleep on the ride home. That is how confident I am in her ability to drive. I believe she has been uneasy about driving alone, so she has lingered getting her license.

I saw this letter as a good opportunity to let her fly. She hopped in her car, and drove off to the Post Office. We live in a very small town, so the Post office is less than a mile away. The only thing you have to worry about here, is a cow, or tractor, stepping out in front of you. When I first learned of my Breast Cancer, she drove me in and out of downtown Austin, so this was cake.

After she had left, I stepped out on the porch, and leaned against one of the large posts. I was filled with peace, and knowing that God had this. Now with this concert, I have to believe, God will protect my daughter from the world around her. There is a prayer I have been praying over her since she was tiny. It has saved my sanity as a parent, and gives me strength.

Prayer of Protection for Your Family by Kellie Copeland Kutz

Allowing her to be a part of this world, but not of this world is rough. She knows more about what’s going on in the world, than I do. We talk about everything, and she shares with me all the crazy stuff she sees on social media. It’s a scary world out there, and I’m not excited about letting her go into it without me. Mama’s…Do your best, and let God do the rest.

In honor of @twentyonepilots tomorrow and my impeccable driving

A post shared by Bailey Holmes (@christiannbay) on

A footnote: Right after I finished writing this, I stepped out onto the porch to get some air. The bird’s nest is now empty, and they are flying around the front yard. Exactly as planned.

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Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 16-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. She found out in March of this year that she has Breast Cancer. Going through Chemo, and believing God for a miracle is where she stands. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

Letting Go, Love, Moving On, Quality of life

Soft and Strong

I woke up early this morning, and was able to think. There is a distinct difference between thinking, and having thoughts. Thank you Chemo for teaching me that difference.

A lot of thoughts came rushing in, once I had my coffee. Most of them were pictures of my past, and mainly my Mother. Pieces of the path that helped make me who I am today. She was such a strong woman. I don’t recall seeing her sit much, and if she was napping, it meant she had worn herself out. The same with crying. She would hide somewhere and weep, and if my siblings, or myself, heard her weeping, something was big time wrong. My daughter sees me cry quite often, and I’m glad.

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My Mother grew up as an only child. Her Mother was of small stature; maybe 5 feet tall. Her Father was a big man, and stood soundly at over 6 feet tall. My Mother was built like her Father, so this ain’t good. She was told, her birth was so traumatic on her Mother’s body, her Mother couldn’t have anymore kids. She grew up believing it was her fault she was an only child.

What a burden to carry. I think because of this, she thought she had to be everything to everybody. I’ve seen a lot of similarities between my Mother, and me, over the years. The first time I went through the ‘Letting Go’ process, I looked at what I learned growing up, and if that served me today. I loved my Mother, but I saw areas in me that needed to change.

My Father was an alcoholic, and so am I. My Grandmother, Mother, and Sister all had Breast Cancer, and so do I. Some traits we inherit, or call it genetics. We might not can change that, but we can change what continues. God is a master at breaking chains, and strongholds, so through Him, we can choose what is good to pass on to our generation.

Do I really want or need to be that strong? Not today Satan. Not today.

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I didn’t quit. I stopped it dead in it’s tracks.

My Mother waited until all four of us kids were grown, and then she left my Dad. He bought her a beautiful house, with everything we didn’t have growing up. Air conditioning was one of those things, and this new house had that. Her walking away pissed me off in more ways than one. This new house had everything she could ever want, but it didn’t have that one thing she craved. It still lacked love, and acceptance of who she wanted to be. She was tired.

I can relate to Mother because I stayed in a marriage that fell out of love, and became for the kids.

I was the same age as her when I walked out of mine. That was my first clue that something needed to change, and it was probably me. Mother stayed strong, and stubborn till her death, but I wanted a different ending to my story. I wanted a story filled with love, and goodness. I refused to allow my daughter to grow up, and not see her Mama truly loved.

Strong will get you through, but soft will get you more. I walked into the bathroom this morning, and noticed a package of toilet paper sitting on the counter. It was being advertised as ‘Soft and Strong.’ I thought, “Well heck! If a roll of toilet paper can be that, then surely I can too!” I am hoping God sees me as more than something we use to wipe with.

I mean really? You gonna one up me toilet paper?

I will fast forward to the end. My Mother’s funeral. I believe she gave of herself her whole life. She was always busy, and helped anyone at the drop of a hat. She gave, but she sucked at receiving. From the simplest compliment, all the way to, “I can do this myself’ mentality. The people that came to her funeral, were the people that felt indebted to her.

We need to receive as much as we give. This is what fuels our flame, and gives us even more to give. Maya Angelou said, ‘I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.’ I hope a lot of people are at my funeral, and not because of what I did, or who I was, but how I made them feel.

It’s gonna be lit fam!

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Barbara is a Writer, Certified Letting Go Coach, and Mom to her 16-year-old daughter. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was the name that stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. She found out in March of this year that she has Breast Cancer. Going through Chemo, and believing God for a miracle is where she stands. Her life is beautiful, and an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

Breast Cancer Journey

Better Than Good

Kudos to my landlord, Pete, for dousing the perimeter of the outside of our home with poison. Haven’t seen a Scorpion in days. I guess they got the message, they were at the wrong house. I am grateful.

I caught Pete this morning taking the trash down to the street. Pete is happily married, and he and his wife, treat me like a daughter. It’s nice, you know? He takes care of all the manly stuff around here, and then goes home to his wife. I like it.

He asked how I was feeling, and I just beamed and told him, “Great!” He looked so perplexed, and said, “You are handling this whole thing so well.” (The Breast Cancer thingy) I just looked at him, laughed, and said, “Oh no, it’s not me. It’s all God!”

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I haven’t kept it much of a secret that I have breast cancer. It was my little secret for a while. I ignored the symptoms for months, and self diagnosed continuously. Reaching for some other conclusion besides the big “C.” How can God get the glory for the miracle in store if nobody knows? I am sharing this journey in hopes of encouraging others through.

My purpose is to show people they can have a beautiful life. An ordinary woman, walking into the second half of her life with a daughter, a few of my favorite things, and God. If I can do it, so can you. How was I going to continue this mission with Cancer? For me, it was an ugly word, so how was there going to be beauty? Because God is a master at beauty.

God knows I am stubborn. He knows it’s going to take time to get me where I need to be. The best way to get my attention is physical pain. God doesn’t cause pain, but He will use it.

I was in a lot of pain. It took time, but it got to the point where I dreaded going to bed at night. I knew it was going to hurt when I laid down. I didn’t share this with anyone. Only the few people who saw me, could tell I was in a world of pain. They watched and waited.

They knew it was going to have to be my decision to go see a doctor. Finally, I surrendered.

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Do you know, the day I left that doctor’s office, my pain subsided? That night was the first night in months, I slept all night with no pain. By surrendering, and taking that first step into the doctor, and onto this path, God was pleased. I was terrified, but God was happy.

At first, I didn’t want anyone to know, or anyone to pity me. Being an Alcoholic with 17 years sobriety, I knew a pity pot was not for me. There is a difference between pity and sympathy. When I wrote the initial Blog about it, some friends were taken aback, and not sure what to say, so I just let them be. Others embraced it, and stood up as Prayer Warriors immediately.

I continued to try and post uplifting messages on my Letitgocoach Facebook page. Knowing that God was going to do something good with this, even though I couldn’t see it right then.

Well…It’s been a little over a month since this journey began, and I have a list of His goodness through this. That will have to be another Blog, because I have learned so much!

Most of the people on my Facebook page don’t even know my name. They call me Coach.

These are the people I didn’t want to disappoint. What if I didn’t sound encouraging enough? The beautiful life was not gonna be so pretty anymore. All these fears crept in, and you should see that page today. I have paused posting so many Memes, and started sharing the beauty of my still beautiful life. It seems more beautiful recently than ever before, or maybe I am seeing it through eyes of no pain. Whatever it is, it’s so much better than good.

Barbara is a writer, Entrepreneur and Mom to her 16-year-old daughter. She loves dipping cookies in her coffee in the morning and has a pretty healthy obsession for chocolate. When she started this Blog in 2014 Letitgocoach was what stuck. She enjoys helping people Let Go of what is holding them back from having a beautiful life. Her life today is an example of Letting Go and Letting God. You may connect with her via email. Letitgocoach@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Breast Cancer Journey, Quality of life

Permission to Rest

I love living in the country, but don’t like all the critters. My daughter found a Scorpion clinging to her bedroom curtain last night right before bed. I caught it, and killed it, which we learned that skill three years ago. Then she walked in my room, and saw one crawl under my bed, right as I was going to sleep. I jumped outta bed, and then it just pissed me off.

To sleep or not to sleep?

I started praying, and asked angels to stand around us as we slept. It was my second Chemo treatment yesterday, and I was determined to get some rest. I knew I was going to have to lay down, in my comfortable bed, and trust God to protect me. He has for years, and I’ve only been stung once by those nasty creatures, and that was during the day. I had to trust.

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I slept for five hours, which was better than none. My Chemo was scheduled for Tuesday of this week. I had a full weekend, and then drove into town to pick up my daughter on Monday. I was not looking forward to driving back into town, an hour away, on Tuesday.

It has been pouring rain here in Texas, so that made the thought of driving even more daunting. I called to see if I could have one more day. That is all I wanted, and they obliged. It was rescheduled for Wednesday. Just having that one day, Tuesday, made all the difference for me. I got things done, and prepared myself mentally, and spiritually for Chemo. I was not backing out of this path I’m on. I just wanted a little more time for me.

blog2I posted this on my Letitgocoach Facebook page a couple of weeks ago, and it got a lot of shares, and likes. If we’re going to move some mountains, we have to get some rest.

This is something I learned with letting go. I had not given myself permission to rest, until a couple of years ago. Before my divorce, I always felt guilty if I took a nap. There were a million things that needed my attention, or so I thought. What I learned is, those things will wait. My health and well being are priority today. Just a 30 minute nap, and I will move mountains.

I have always been healthy. I love Yoga, buy food from local Farmer’s, drink plenty of water, and take my liquid nutritional product. We live in a toxic world, so we need to pour good things into our bodies. When I found the lump in my breast, I knew I had forgotten my core for a while. Slaying my way through a divorce, putting life and it’s happenings before me.

Our body is our temple, and God only gave us one. Today, I take care of it, and give it permission to rest.

 

 

 

Breast Cancer Journey

While I Wait

They say it’s Cancer, but they don’t know my God. I sit and listen as they tell me what they see, but I can’t assimilate all the words at once. I’m a writer, so I love words. Just not these.

whileiwaitThe Insurance kicked in March 1st, and one week later I saw my doctor. She sent me straight to Austin, TX for the mammogram, and a few days later, I was having the biopsy.

The biopsy was Friday, and Monday afternoon my doctor called me in to talk. That is never good. She said the ‘C’ word, and said I have ‘Infiltrating Ductal Carcinoma.’ It’s the most common type of breast cancer in 80% of women, and typically hits the more mature woman of 50 or over. My grandmother, mother and sister had it. I thought I would break the cycle.

I woke up this morning more grateful than a week ago. The Cancer Specialist cannot see me for another week. My doctor had to call four places before she could find one to take me in. Our Cancer centers are overflowing with people with a similar situation as me. That is sad.

So, I have a week to wait and see a doctor’s plan for treatment. God has been in front of me on this journey. He has moved swiftly up until now. He’s not done teaching me how to wait.

God is working while I wait.

He needs time to line up the next part of this journey. What that looks like, I don’t know, but He has a plan. My first thought during this was, “How can God get the glory for this?”

Well, I can write about it, and hopefully encourage someone else with what I’m going through. God has given me a beautiful life. The last three years have been exceptionally beautiful. I’m not sure this is going to be pretty, but He promises to turn everything around for His good and His glory. He has already proved that His plan is always better than mine.

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There is a song by Colton Dixon, Through All Of It. I have no regrets, like he mentions in the song. God sees what we’re going through. He has seen every tear I have shed over this. My favorite part of the song is…But Oh…You have been my God through all of this!

There are no surprises.

Not for God. He’s on the throne mighty as ever.

So, while I wait to see the next doctor, I see the beauty in life a little bit more. The pace of life has slowed, and what I thought was important is not so important anymore. I hug my daughter every chance I get, and tell people ‘I love you’ more than before. My laughter still shakes a room, and I take time to notice what other’s may be going through while they wait.

Sometimes life feels like one big waiting room. I told my friend in North Carolina. “I’m just waiting to see how God get’s the glory.” Like we say in the country, “Hey! Watch this!”