Tag: #trustinggod

The Right Time

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To change as gracefully as the seasons.

I had to smile at myself as I was trying to make the bedroom blinds hang level. Gently releasing the left cord and then the right, back and forth until it fell into a level edge. I thought, “Wow Barb. If only you could do that in real life.”

Just by pulling the right cord.

My circumstances are changing, but it’s not happening fast enough for me. The first glimpse was last Christmas and it was like God whispered, “Get ready. It’s coming.”

I know I’m being ridiculous. We don’t end a day in Winter and wake up to an immediate Spring. (We sorta do in Texas, but you catch my drift) It happens gradually my darling. Each day and night becomes a little bit warmer, until we arrive in a new season.

I made this comment to my daughter. “By the end of March my life will look totally different.” It just fell out of my mouth and I don’t know whether to be excited, or scared.

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It’s not my job to hurry change or slow it down, but today I want to. Just like the blinds, I wanted to hold one cord in each hand to feel that sense of control with this change. I wanted to see the sun streaming in instead of looking at the clouds.

I want, I want, I want, is not how it works, thankfully. I’m not in charge and today I can be grateful for that. Have Faith in what you know. The sun is still shining above the clouds. I don’t have to see it to know.

The dominoes are lining up, and a gentle breeze will begin their fall, at the right time.

Here and Now

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Today is one of those rare days where I feel I’m right where I need to be. I spent the better part of yesterday cleaning my home, and rearranging items to make them more eye pleasing. I bought a lamp.

I’ve always been drawn to light.

I didn’t need a lamp, but this lamp replaced one that wasn’t giving off the right light for the space it was in. I had gone to this store to find a storage container when I saw the lamp. I walked out of the store carrying the lamp and no storage container. 🙂

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Shout our to Little Fears for Lucy hanging in the background.

I love the streams of light.

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When my daughter and I moved out of the country and into this sleepy little lake town, I wasn’t sure it was the right move. It took time for it to feel right.

One year later, I’m working part time at the local pizza place. A young couple sitting at a table asked, “Why are you here?”, like I looked out of place.

My response was, “To bless others.”

He quoted a scripture and we began talking about God and what He is doing in our lives. I mentioned this Blog and my hope to bless others through writing. He told me this town I live in is for writers.

He began telling me some of the history of the town and it used to be considered a haven for writers. His neighbor rents his house to writers throughout the year when they need a quiet space for inspiration.

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When I first began at the pizza place, I asked God, “Why?” Three months later I’m able to relax and have meaningful conversations with patrons. They bless me just as much as I bless them.

God puts us in places that makes us wonder ‘why’, but we need to trust it’s part of a greater plan.

It may not make sense, and it will be uncomfortable at first, but today I know we’re right where we need to be.

Trust the Wait

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I didn’t do my Morning Pages this morning. I spent time with my daughter before she left for her college classes. Wednesday’s are like that.

I’m still haunted by yesterday’s Morning Pages.

It was basically three pages of questions. Then later in the day I saw these words, “Choose uncertainty over unhappiness.” That is what I chose to do. 

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Every thought turned into a question mark.

I envisioned scooping the question marks off the page and into my hand. Then I threw them up in the air as if saying, “Let it all go and see what stays.”

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This morning I came across a Blog I posted four years ago, and re-posted two years later. What’s funny is I cannot recall what was happening in my life at the time of the post. Reading it gave me the feeling of staring up at a giant while holding a slingshot. Whatever it was is no longer here, and wasn’t memorable. You can read the post here.

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It’s a change of season and with that uncertainty can visit. That doesn’t mean it has permission to drag us over into unhappiness.

Today my lovely, just trust the wait.

The End Result

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My daughter and I went to Houston this week, and saw Noah Gundersen. It was a lovely venue, and Noah is not very well-known yet, so the crowd was small and intimate. Getting there was a struggle. We exited the interstate, were stopped by a red light in a major intersection in downtown Houston, and the car stopped running. It completely died.

She starting crying, but I remained calm, and called AAA.

I was grateful to be with her. God does this all the time in our lives. When one is weak, the other is strong. When she is having a low day, I am on top of the world, and vice versa.

Our circumstances didn’t look very good, but God is faithful. He gives us the tools we need to get out of any situation we’re in. A man pulled up beside us, got out of his van putting himself in danger, wanting to push her car out of the busy intersection. AAA showed up at that point, got us out of the intersection, and the man went back to the safety of his van. We had to stay calm and trust the journey.

Today’s reading in Jesus Calling says, “Put more energy into trusting Me, and enjoying my presence. Don’t let your well-being depend on your circumstances. Instead, connect your joy to My precious promises.” November 5th.

The car was towed to a mechanic, and there was a lady there having her tires checked. She noticed us stepping out of the cab of the tow truck, and asked if she could give us a ride to the hotel. She was a delight, and it surprised her when I gave her a big hug for the rescue. I don’t believe she was accustomed to being hugged, so this small act of kindness caught her off guard. I was grateful for her, and to be standing safely in front of the hotel. It was beautiful!

It took longer to get through our circumstances than it did to drive to Houston. Our hotel was 5 miles away from where the car broke down, but we couldn’t leave. Plus, the Astros had won the World Series the night before, so it was chaotic! What we face may look daunting, but give it a little wink, and trust the journey. The end result is worth it.

noah
Front and center with Noah.

Feel the Music

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I know I have been sharing a lot of Christian music recently, but that is what I have been listening to.

Music was not a part of my life for a season.

Four years ago, I had this phone I absolutely loved, and it had free music on it. You may recall, it’s the phone I used to play my praise and worship music on the pier in Praise Him Anyway. 

My phone carrier stopped offering the free music feature. When my daughter received a stereo for Christmas, music was back in our home. God wants us to hear, and feel the music.

Psalm 95:1 says, “Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.” This week, I have been singing so much, and so loudly, my throat is sore.

It all started when my daughter hooked up the sub-woofer. It was more than just hearing it like before. I could feel it.

This is song number three this week, but every time it comes on the radio, I jump up and start singing along with it. I’ve danced so much, my dog tries to dance along with me. If my 12-year-old dog gets excited, my hope is God does too.

Through this song, God is saying, “If you could only let your guard down. You could learn to trust me somehow. I swear, that I won’t let you go.”

I’m finally to the point of not letting Him go either.

A Better Life

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I was talking to a friend a while back about Letting Go. She still harbors some anger toward her ex-husband, so I offered assistance. She said, “I’m not sure I wanna let go! Sometimes I use it as fuel to get stuff done.” At first I laughed, but afterwards, I could relate.

The quote below is from the book, “A Better Way To Live“, by Og Mandino. This post is entitled, “A Better Life”, because to have ‘a better life’, you need, ‘a better way to live.’

Count your blessings. Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play, and you will finally be able to move forward toward the life God intended for you…with grace, strength, courage, and confidence.

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This is one of my favorite Memes. I love how it has a child displayed, instead of a grownup. We are supposed to have child-like faith, and know that we are valuable.

We are a child of the one true King.

He already says we are more valuable than the birds, (Matt. 6:26), and they are well taken care of everyday. Have you ever seen a stressed out bird? I haven’t.

My daughter reads my Blog usually before I publish it. She read the one I wrote earlier this week about, How to Have a Beautiful Life, and claimed it as one her favorites.

When we devalue ourselves it should be disturbing. Otherwise we are settling for less than God’s very best for us. Your spirit should give you some signs. You are valuable.

For me, it’s like something is taking up space in my heart, but not fulfilling me anymore. At one time this was a welcome addition to my beautiful life, but now it adds no beauty or life. I remember what it feels like to get disturbed, and make a decision not to take it anymore. If you feel devalued, I give you permission right now to let it disturb you.

Once you make a decision to let it go, you will feel lighter. Everything that Og says in the suggestion above will occur. Some people are afraid to let go of what they have because it’s better than having nothing.

In my experience, God always has better in store. By letting go of what we have that doesn’t bring us joy, we’re trusting Him to bring us into a better life.