Pieces of Me

letitallgo

Last year, I let it all go, to see what stayed.

I believe a lot of people are trying to decide what they want to do with their life. I asked a friend, “What were you doing, and at what point in your life were you doing it, that made your heart happy?” We can go back and see what’s there.

My most favorite job was working in a custom frame shop.

It was my first real job, in my 20’s, and I loved cutting glass.

In my 30’s, I was visiting a friend, and she took me on a tour of her stained glass studio. She has just begun making it, and had a few pieces hanging in her home. I loved the way the light came through, and became colored light.

She was a good bit older than me, and her kids were grown.

I admired her for doing this later in life, like there were no rules on when to begin. Visiting with her that day planted a seed in my heart. Now, some twenty years later, I have taken my first stained glass class. It was a basic cutting class, and there I was, loving the sound of the glass being scored. Breaking it into desired the pieces.

The teacher strolled by and said, “You are a natural at this.”

There was a next level class to take, but it had a waiting list. The teacher put my name on the list, but I didn’t think much about it. As life would have it, I forgot about it until they called with an opening, asking if I was interested.

The class starts next week, so I went in yesterday to choose a pattern of what to make. This class walks you through from start to finish. There are four classes total. One a week, with practice in between. I get to practice breaking things.

Letting go of the pieces of me that have accumulated over the years, revealed a piece lost, and forgotten. Here’s to making something beautiful with the broken pieces.

 

Set it free

beamoflight

One of the things I love about this house, is it’s light.

reflection

Light dances on my bedroom wall in the morning.

Light plays an intricate role in our well-being. I can feel the difference on a rainy day, verses a clear one. It doesn’t have to be a full blaze of sunshine type day, but I do need light.

The front door of this house had been mistreated.

It’s a metal door with windows at the top, designed to let light in. I didn’t notice on the initial walk through, but the windows looked to be sprayed painted over. I asked the landlord if he had another door we could use to replace this one, but he did not. This was one of those moments to embrace what you have, and make the very best of it.

light1

Before

My best guess is, when the painter sprayed the ceiling, he didn’t cover the windows of the door. They had some type of over-spray on them that blocked the light from coming in. I grabbed a straight edge razor, and began scraping.

It came off easy enough with the razor, but it made me wonder how many people would go to these lengths for light? Was it over-spray, or did someone spray paint it on purpose? It obviously didn’t bother the previous tenant.

light2

After

Now clean, those small windows make a big difference.

Sometimes, the light will naturally flow in and find us.

Other times, we need to unmask the blockage, and set it free.

Before it Breaks

I enjoy fixing things, but have my limits.

I’ll begin with the shower from our previous home as an example. The spout didn’t function to the best of its ability.

This happened over time. When you turned the water on, it came out of the spout, and into the tub. The little knob you pull up, to send the water to the shower head had a problem. It has been used for years, and began to break under pressure. It was falling apart, and couldn’t completely stop the water from flowing out of the spout. The shower head couldn’t receive the full flow potential.

There was water spewing from the spout, and trickling from the shower head. It was like it couldn’t decide how much it wanted to give me, and from where. It wasn’t fun.

My landlord’s helper stopped by to complete an unfinished task, and I showed him the shower. He knew exactly what to do, and within the hour, had installed a new spout. Now the lever could stop all the trickling from the spout, and give a full force shower! The ginormous rain head, rained!

My landlord had no idea it was broken. He said, “You need to tell me these things before it breaks.”

spout

When we moved into our new home, I found it ironic this shower had the same issue. It was like a test to see how long it would take for me to say something was wrong.

I quickly snapped a pic, and sent it to my landlord, asking him to please fix this. He sent his handyman to replace the spout, but once complete, he felt bad because the finishes didn’t match. I told him, ‘It doesn’t have to look perfect. As long as it works, and offers up it’s very best, we’re good.”

 

These Three Gates

The privacy fence around the backyard has four gates.

One is at the end of the driveway. It has a vine growing along the fence, and up a small arbor, waiting to bloom.

I haven’t discovered yet, where the other three lead.

gate

Gate to driveway.

Whoever built the house, and fence, had a reason, but it’s a mystery to me. I have a neighbor on each side, and one behind me, and a gate opens into each of their backyards. This fence was probably built before social media replaced human interaction. I haven’t had a neighbor in 5 years!

I haven’t written much about the effects social media had on my life, but it wasn’t healthy. God started working on me last year, after ‘I Bled Out‘, and I found myself bucking the trend of social media. There are still no social media apps on my phone, and I rarely take my phone when I leave the house.

This from a woman who spent years promoting a Blog, and encouraging others via social media.

A couple of weeks ago, I disconnected this Blog from all social media outlets. It doesn’t automatically post, once published. It sits right here in the WordPress world.

dwell-as-near-as-possible

I want to dwell as near as possible to where life flows.

I will let you know what is on the other side of these three gates.

Sow Some Seeds (Part 7)

Here are the last of our seeds.

My hope is they are planted in your heart, and you will reap a harvest of goodness now, and in the coming year.

Here are today’s seeds:

I will pause whenever I am feeling sorry for myself today, and remember that this is the only day I have and must play it to the fullest. What my part may signify in the great whole, I may not recognize, but I am here to play it and now is the time.

I will remember that those who have fewest regrets are those who take each moment as it comes for all that it’s worth.

Live in the now. Play it to the fullest! Have no regrets.

This is my day!

These are my seeds.

Thank you, God, for this precious garden of time.

Wishing you a beautiful Christmas, and a New Year filled with God’s very best! Much love, Barb and Bay. xx

Parts of this Blog are taken from The Seeds of Success, by Og Mandino.

If you would like to be a part of my work, click here.

Let It Snow

It’s snowing on WordPress, and in my home.

My daughter loves Christmas. It’s the most beautiful time of the year! A couple of years ago, I took a picture of a Vintage Shoppe’s window display of snow. It was so cute, I showed it my daughter this week. Well…..she ran with the idea.

Once we figured out how it was made, she ran to the store for fishing line, and cotton balls. She fluffed each cotton ball, and cut a strand of fishing line to her desired length. She passed the line through an eye of a needle, and stuck the needle through the ball. It fell down the line and stopped at the knot. She tied another knot where she wanted the next cotton ball to land, and continued on.

letitsnow

Photo cred Semloh Photography

She found it very soothing to make, and I find snowballs hanging in the windows a soothing addition to our home.

This picture displays only one window she did. Yep…every window in out home will have snow by the time she’s done.

We are moving into a new home at the end of the year, so while I’m wrapping my mind around what needs to leave this house, she is adding more to it. This would stress some people out, but I’m gonna let her have at it, and let it snow.

Be More Clear

I ran into a friend yesterday, and she asked, “Are you okay?” She had a look of concern on her face, and I assured her that I was. She had read my Blog about the Cancer scare, and wanted to make sure I was all good. She is not the only friend that wasn’t sure, so let’s see if I can be more clear.

A lot of what we go through in life is a test of some sort.

strong

I don’t believe there is Cancer in my breast. The technician wasn’t sure what she was seeing during the sonogram, so I had the films sent to my Oncologist who knows my history. He didn’t see anything concerning, but wants to see my next film in six months. I’m not worried, so don’t you be either!

God used that situation to reach the right people, and I now have really good health insurance! WooHoo!

In March, or April of next year, I will have another mammogram, and have faith for God’s best. Since walking out of the imaging center a month ago, I have made life changes, and am still making them. When God shows me His best, I want to give Him my best in return. The entire incident brought this to the forefront of my mind. “What do I want my life to look in six months? Am I living God’s best?”

The End Result

My daughter and I went to Houston this week, and saw Noah Gundersen. It was a lovely venue, and Noah is not very well-known yet, so the crowd was small and intimate. Getting there was a struggle. We exited the interstate, were stopped by a red light in a major intersection in downtown Houston, and the car stopped running. It completely died.

She starting crying, but I remained calm, and called AAA.

I was grateful to be with her. God does this all the time in our lives. When one is weak, the other is strong. When she is having a low day, I am on top of the world, and vice versa.

Our circumstances didn’t look very good, but God is faithful. He gives us the tools we need to get out of any situation we’re in. A man pulled up beside us, got out of his van putting himself in danger, wanting to push her car out of the busy intersection. AAA showed up at that point, got us out of the intersection, and the man went back to the safety of his van. We had to stay calm and trust the journey.

Today’s reading in Jesus Calling says, “Put more energy into trusting Me, and enjoying my presence. Don’t let your well-being depend on your circumstances. Instead, connect your joy to My precious promises.” November 5th.

The car was towed to a mechanic, and there was a lady there having her tires checked. She noticed us stepping out of the cab of the tow truck, and asked if she could give us a ride to the hotel. She was a delight, and it surprised her when I gave her a big hug for the rescue. I don’t believe she was accustomed to being hugged, so this small act of kindness caught her off guard. I was grateful for her, and to be standing safely in front of the hotel. It was beautiful!

It took longer to get through our circumstances than it did to drive to Houston. Our hotel was 5 miles away from where the car broke down, but we couldn’t leave. Plus, the Astros had won the World Series the night before, so it was chaotic! What we face may look daunting, but give it a little wink, and trust the journey. The end result is worth it.

noah

Front and center with Noah.

In Six Months

Once you have Cancer, it doesn’t completely leave your mind.

I said no to going to see my Breast Surgeon. Instead, I called the imaging center, and asked them to send the films to my Oncologist. If I had to choose who to go see, it would be him. His office called and he agreed with the Radiologist. He’s not concerned, but wants to see me in six months.

6months

When I left the imaging center, those words were playing on a loop in my mind. “See you in six months.” How would I live my life the next six months? What have I been putting off doing? I listened to my heart the whole way home.

As soon as I walked through the door, I bought concert tickets to see Noah Gundersen.

My daughter has seen him in concert, and he is one of our favorite artists. He’s not very well-known, so the tickets are cheap. She wants me to see him in concert, and she asked for these tickets as part of her birthday in August.

She had a priority list of things she’d like for her birthday, and we did everything on her little list, except the tickets. He’s playing in Houston, so that meant spending the night. I called my co-worker, and asked if I could work her hours. She said yes, so I made the extra money to enjoy the upcoming concert, and we will spend the night in Houston.

My daughter thought maybe I cancelled my appointment because of money. I said, “No darling. We have the money, but we are going to see Noah, and cherish the moment.”

 

I’m Not Going

I’m not going to my appointment today.

There are two ways God knows He can get my attention. Money, and physical pain. God also knows I’m continually on the lookout for the next right thing being done. What happened yesterday, was not the next right thing for me.

My health insurance ran out in March of this year.

When I made the appointment with my breast surgeon a couple of weeks ago, the lady on the phone assured me that the cost of the appointment could be broken down into payments afterwards. A lady from the surgeons office called yesterday to tell me that the appointment would need to be paid in full at the time of service. Sorry, but no.

That is not what I was told when I agreed to come in.

That decision has placed me on a new path this morning.

Thank you for your love and prayers. Forgive me for not going.

godsway