Retire the Mask

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“You can’t judge a book by it’s cover”, is how the saying goes. I wonder if society will ever stop judging people by what they wear, or how they look? Fortunately, I’m at the age where that no longer matters to me.

This week, I went to a dental appointment, and was dressed casually, but nice. Afterwards I drove to the market which sits in a shopping center beside one of my favorite gift shops. As the seasons change, I like to stop in that shop to see the newest Voluspa candles on display. Walking through the door, I see two women near the back chatting, but they didn’t say anything to me, so I made my way toward the candle display to look. The supply was limited, but something I noticed during my time there was neither woman acknowledged my presence, not even a ‘Hello.’ I left and went next door to the market.

This was the second time this week this happened at businesses I frequently shop at. It was odd, especially since I know the owner of the gift shop and she would be mortified to know her clients didn’t feel welcomed. I had found a candle while there and would have purchased it under friendlier circumstances, but instead, I went home and made the purchase online from the actual candle company. My friend’s shop missed a sale.

I wasn’t upset because I knew how to let it go, but what bothered me was how my friend’s shop was being represented in an unfriendly manner. People push, ‘buy local’, but if we’re going to comply, it needs to be a gratifying experience. Will I get dressed up to go shopping like I did in my 20’s and 30’s? Nope, but I will be freshly showered so when I give someone a hug, I smell good. Sometimes I’ll spray my shirt with perfumed glitter spray, so after we hug, the glitter transfers onto them to find later in the day when needed. Whoever said, ‘Leave a little sparkle wherever you go’, I took that literally.

Just be you, my darling and retire the mask. Your people will see past the outer shell, straight to your heart. A good practice is to treat everyone you meet, the way you want to be treated and be kind, always. ~ Barb.

Farewell to Who I Thought I Was

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It’s Saturday morning in the first week of October and my home is so still and quiet, one could hear my stomach grumble.

I’m supposed to be attending a Jack Canfield, Breakthrough to Success weekend workshop. I was invited by someone who doesn’t know me very well, but sees me as motivated. Friday was the first day I attended, but it reminded me of a Richard Simmons workout, as the spokesman was trying to get the audience pumped up and motivated before Jack appeared.

It was a revelation that my nervous system couldn’t handle the energy of the environment created by the motivational speaker, but 20 years ago I thought I wanted to be him. Now I realize you can make an impact quietly.

Friday, I met a friend for coffee and on the drive over I asked myself if there were any problems in my life that needed to be resolved. The only thing that came to mind was that morning catching the dog with his head in the litter box, eating cat poop. He knew that was not acceptable as soon as he was caught, so that problem had passed. I shared this with my friend and we had a hearty laugh.

Finding people to love and to be loved is connecting with the chosen few who align with your kind of crazy.

I’m making shifts, creating space, and purchased a book of blank pages to write the next chapter. I’m officially letting go of Letitgocoach, but continue to write. Letitgocoach became a name that others knew me by, but there’s no desire to fill those shoes. It was something I had to prove to myself that I could get certified and did, only to place another check mark on the ‘did that’ list.

When I talk with people in my life today, they say, “Tell me about Barb’s world”, and that makes me smile. I’ve been writing on that WordPress site, but want to share with you…I’m letting go of who I thought I was, to become who I was made to be. Thank you for your love and kind words of support through the years. I’d love for you to join me Inbarbsworld. 💖

The Next Chapter

Hope For It

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I slid on my first long sleeve shirt of the season for my morning walk. Made a pour over cup of coffee and let it sit to enjoy upon my return. Grabbed the letter laying by the front door and once my feet hit the payment, into the mailbox it went.

Brian made a comment about Hallmark cards, but I rarely use them. Writing a letter or jotting a note is an opportunity to search out artists who make them and support their craft. One artist I’ve been hooked on for a while now is David Arms. Some of his cards lean toward Christianity, but not all of them. David’s intention is to convey hope and discovered his artistic gift late in life.

How he delivers your order.

This gives me hope because I’m still trying to figure out what I want to do. Since my daughter left the nest I ponder meaningful ways in which to spend this one, precious life. I’m sharing this 2 minute video in hopes you find it inspiring, because as long as there’s breath in our bodies, we still have a purpose. It surprises David to this day that he’s an artist and he describes it by saying, he didn’t know to hope for it.

Who Is David Arms?

To see the feature photo in all it’s glory, hover your mouse, or finger over it. It’s from David’s website here. To view notecards by David Arms, click here.

Worth the Risk

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Walking to the mailbox, notecards in hand, I slid them into the box. My hand reached over to the side, and pulled the red flag up so it’s standing straight up in the air. The mail lady will lower it when she replaces my mail with hers and I’ll know the mail has run for another day.

I sat at the kitchen table watching through the window as it rains, trying to focus on work but am soothed by the sound. When it was time for a break I snapped a photo of additional items used in letter writing. I’m mildly obsessed with this black tray with gold handles, so it worked well for photo purposes under cloudy skies and low light. Writing a letter goes back to what Dawn so eloquently stated in the first post.

We learn much about another person through a written letter. The penmanship, the color of the ink, type of writing instrument, stationary and even the stamp all are clues to the individuality of the writer.

Dawn from Aging With Grace

Find a piece of paper that feels good to write on, or make your own. One of my letters received was written on a piece of paper my friend turned into stationary using her artistic flair. Whatever type paper that feels good to you, choose it for your letter. Sometimes Dawn uses a fountain pen, but we’ve come to the conclusion I need more control than that offers. She uses a rubber stamp that imprints her address on the front of the envelope in a circle formation. We both write in cursive, but my choice of ink is purple, or teal. The majority of my writing papers, notecards and supplies come from a small, family owned company called Letter Seals.

Stamps for wax seals by Letter Seals.

We each have our own style and the fun part is finding it. Writing a letter is like having a one-sided conversation, but it feeds the heart like no other writing. For this writer it will always be worth the risk.

Previous posts in this little series:

  1. Write a Letter
  2. The Letter Opener
  3. Send Some Love

Send Some Love

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There’s no set schedule who to write to and when. Much like blogging, if something is on my heart to share, the letter is written. I received a call Friday night from a dear friend thanking me for the card. I didn’t know why she’d been so heavy on my heart and mind the last couple of weeks, but I dropped her a note in the mail. Little did I know she’s been recovering from Covid.

I don’t believe I’ve ever thrown a letter away. My sister and I would write to one another and I would keep her letters in a drawer of the console. As the enchantment with letter writing increased they required a space of their own. I remembered having this box that wasn’t being used for anything and saw it fitting for letters. As you can see, we’re going to need a bigger box.

In talking with Brian this week, I discovered he too loves to write letters. The name of his blog Is Writing From the Heart, which as heart writers, that’s what we do. Brian was doubting his penmanship which you can see here, but how you write isn’t the reason behind the letter. It’s in the message of what you wish to convey. It doesn’t matter how well crafted your handwriting is. You have to trust the words you send will be legible. A letter is to be written slowly, with ease and it’s not something to rush through.

Writing a letter is an opportunity to relax the mind and share from the heart. When I purchase a bigger box, it won’t need the word ‘love’ painted on it because from what I can see that’s what it will hold. Every envelope represents a sweet soul who took the time to send some love.

Previous posts in this series:

  1. Write a Letter
  2. The Letter Opener

The Letter Opener

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The coffee bar was loved by my daughter and me. We know a variety of ways to create a cup of the magical brew, so beans and gadgets deserved a dedicated space. When she moved out, I sent half of it with her. She took her favorite parts and left mine with me, so there was a lot of empty space.

Sitting in my corner, I look at the table to my right, and its contents describe me. It’s where I sit most mornings after my walk to enjoy that first cup of the day. I’ve been trying to take a picture of this item lying in place, but it’s so shiny it confuses the camera. My corner is also where I sit to read letters from friends, so that’s where the letter opener resides. I never knew I needed a letter opener until I met Dawn.

Dawn mentioned in one of her letters that she sat down with her letter opener and a nice cup of tea to read mine. “That’s the proper way,” she said. I didn’t have a letter opener, but Google could locate one for purchase. An online search revealed one made by Reed & Barton, and that seemed proper to me. The box it came in was so elegant it was difficult to leave it out of the box. Every time I’d use it, which took time to learn the proper way, I’d put it back in the box. Once I started receiving letters more frequently, the box found its home in a drawer, and the letter opener became a tool of everyday life. My daughter told me not to leave it laying by the front door. “If someone broke in, it would be like handing them the weapon,” she said.

The camera wasn’t sure what to focus on.

My gratitude is overwhelming for the souls who add light to my path with letter’s written and received. The love shines as brightly as the letter opener.

Write a Letter

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There’s a sign hanging in my home that reveals my perspective has changed. It reads, “I am fairly certain given a cape and a nice tiara, I could save the world.” I no longer wish to save the world, but I do want to touch people’s lives and I’m perfectly content with one person at a time.

The day my daughter was loading up her Jeep with some of her belongings, she told me, “I want you to make this house look like your own.” Mostly, it already did, but I took her words to heart. Over the weekend, the coffee bar turned into a letter writing station because a couple of years ago, I published this blogpost and began writing letters. It’s simple, yet nothing compares to the joy it brings. This venture began with one letter to a fellow blogger and has expanded to touching hearts all over the world.

It reminds me of the pen pal relationships of the past. Strangers whose connection is based on their exchange of letters. In this case, we began to know each other through our blogs and now we do exchange letters. I am enjoying what I suppose, is a non-traditional friendship, in today’s world. We learn much about another person through a written letter. The penmanship, the color of the ink, type of writing instrument, stationary and even the stamp all are clues to the individuality of the writer.

Dawn of Aging With Grace

I’d never imagined by writing a letter to Dawn we’d be corresponding through snail mail for almost a year now and I’m grateful. My supplies outgrew their basket, hence the letter writing station. With everything out in view, I’m more apt to pause and ponder who needs some love. Then lean in to write a letter.

Here’s more on letter writing:

2. The Letter Opener

3. Send Some Love

4. Worth the Risk

5. Hope For It